The Two Faces of a JW

by Nosferatu 19 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    It always amazed me how JWs can have almost two different personalities. It's not quite like having a double life, but it's the hypocricy of JWs themselves.

    I remember going to those meetings and seeing everyone with their plastic smiles, as if they were the greatest people in the world. But you lift the curtain of their home lives, and their true personalities come out.

    My mother was an entirely different person at the meetings. She seemed happy, considerate, and enjoyable to be around. But at home, she was mean, nasty, and cursed like a sailor.

    I'd like to hear your stories of the alternate personalities of the JWs you've known. What they were like at the meeting, and what they were like outside the congregation.

  • buriram
    buriram

    Funny that my wife would portray herself as this poor abused wife who's husband had become an apostate, blah blah blah, yet when she came home was bad tempered, violent, moody, and her language was peppered with the F and C word as well.

  • aniron
    aniron

    Yeah come across the same myself.

    Sisters all meek and submissive at meetings etc but gave their unbelieving husbands hell at home, and they wonder why they didn't come into the "truth".

    A brother who was all "spiritual" at meetings, always going on about preaching. Yet when I met one of his work colleagues he was totally surprised that the guy was a JW.

    The son of an Elder who was all "goody-goody" at meetings. But at school was known as a foul-mouthed lout, who smoked and flirted with the girls, as told by one of my sons who went to same school. He is still the same now he is working.

    A JW who works in same place as my son, who plays poker during the lunch hour.

    Brothers who after a meeting would be off to a pub for a drink.

    I stick to the "rules" and I'm the one who gets the stick from Elders/

  • sf
    sf

    Yes, it would be interesting if many of the two-faced ones that have been coming here, for quite some time, would give their experiences of this dynamic, as they attend their meetings, then get home and rush to the nearest apostate online.

    Anyone of you care to share just how you do it? A rough glimpse, if you will.

    I'm serious here. {I'm serious everywhere.}

    It is Halloween everyday in the life of a devoted, loyal jw.

    sKally

  • lovelylil
    lovelylil

    This is a good thread. I can think of many cases but here are a few:

    There was the elder and his wife who were always lovey - dovey at the meetings. And he would give compliments to his wife all the time during the studies. She would always fawn over him and all the other sisters were jealous of their relationship because their husbands did not give them the same attention as this "brother" did to his wife. Anyway, after they were married for 24 years, the whole congregation was shocked when when it was announced that the "brother" was disfelloshipped (adultery) and then the truth came out from the wife about how her husband beat her often at home, was an alchohlic and mentally abusive to her and the three kids.

    Then there was the loving family all the other families wanted to be like. The elder/pioneer hubby. The pioneer/stay at home mom - the perfect children. Too bad it was an illusion. It came out that the father was an abusive drunk, mom was a drunk too, and the kids were smoking, having underage sex and stealing from the homes of their friends.

    I can name about 100 of these stories. The problem with all works oriented religions is that you can look great on the outside (white washed graves) but inside are.... how did Jesus state it? "full of every disgusting and vile thing". True faith which is not based upon outward works and appearance - changes your heart and you become a new better person. The fact that most Witnesses do not change at all but just hide their sins is proof that God's spirit is not really in them. Lilly

  • Warlock
    Warlock
    I stick to the "rules" and I'm the one who gets the stick from Elders

    I never got the stick from the elders, but I tried sooooooooo hard to stick to the "rules". After quite a few years, I found out that many were breaking the "rules" I was trying to stick to.

    Then, they have the nerve to tell others how to act!

    That was very discouraging to me.

    Warlock

  • cyd0099
    cyd0099

    Back in the day, I was guilty of this as well but my last two dub roommates really stretched the limits for me. One was a tall black brother with nipple piercings who had a collection of naked photos women would send to him. He went to goth clubs on Friday nights and would stay up until it was time for FS on Saturday. He also had a dead rat in a tupperware jar until it got so rotten he could boil the flesh from it's bones and keep the skull and other rcognizable bones. The other worked with me. 'Worked' is an overstatement. He slept and drank on the job, he had a porno mag stash. He stole booze from me (my deceased father's last bottle of homemade Elderberry wine, no less). And yet HE was used in the congo. He was popular with the sisters. He was being fast tracked to MS and held up as an example to ME.

  • AnnOMaly
    AnnOMaly

    Yes, it would be interesting if many of the two-faced ones that have been coming here, for quite some time, would give their experiences of this dynamic, as they attend their meetings, then get home and rush to the nearest apostate online.

    Anyone of you care to share just how you do it? A rough glimpse, if you will.

    OK sKally.

    People are multi-faceted anyway, and show only certain sides of themselves for the sake of convention, or to avoid upsetting others, outright hypocrisy or whatever numerous motives there are. But the reasons behind the behavior of going to meetings and living the life of a JW, then 'rushing to the nearest apostate online'?

    In a nutshell, it restores their sanity.

  • still wondering
    still wondering

    My mother exhibited many of the traits of the perfect witness when with others but at home and dealings with the neighbours she was the most devious, underhanded dishonest, arrogant, hateful individual I knew or have ever met since.

    After many decades of pondering this anomaly the only conclusion I can come to is that she had been an abused child. I hope she had been as that is the only way I can see to forgive her for the damage she did me, both physically and mentally as a child.

    The Watchtower religion gave her the perfect cover to hide all her abominable personality traits while giving her the satisfaction of "knowing" she was better than others.

  • done4good
    done4good

    Too many scenarios to list....

    j

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