Dubs who shun those not DFed/DAed who fade

by gumby 46 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • gumby
    gumby

    Lately I have been reading alot about those who cease the dub life, and though they are not officially DFed or DAed, are treated as though they are by dub family and friends. Is this relatively new?

    When I was a dub , I remember viewing those who did not come to meeting's anymore nor field service......as simply "weak" or inactive. Never do I remember shunning or snubbing those who seemed to fade away. Did I miss something that has changed recently?

    It seems there is a new breed of "faders" that didn't exist in the numbers they now do, and it appears instructions were given on how to treat them by the many experiences that are shared here.

    Gumby

  • shamus
    shamus

    I was always told that they were bad assosiation, and they knew what they had to do. Wheras it's not official, it's the unofficial that counts; kind of like hiding sexual abuse of children in the congregations.

  • XQsThaiPoes
    XQsThaiPoes

    According to the watchtower the offical stance is to re-love bomb them like when they first became interested in JWs. I had it happen to me it is eerie. What is worse I wonder being shunned, or having a brand new speacial friend calling you to go out to lunch after feild service EVERY FREAKING SUNDAY when you dont even know their name?

  • candidlynuts
    candidlynuts

    i was invisible when i was active, invisible when i was inactive.. its great how poverty keeps you from being noticed.

  • shamus
    shamus

    XQ,

    You still go out in field service? Jesus! What kind of drugs do you take to do it, LOL!

  • confusedjw
    confusedjw

    Gumbo - It's what the SuperRighteous do.

    Most don't - unless they get a whiff of negativity toward the org.

  • gumby
    gumby

    Candid...(((((((((( ))))))))) so sorry you were treated that way. Sadly, I don't think your case is a rare one.

    XQ,

    According to the watchtower the offical stance is to re-love bomb them like when they first became interested in JWs. I had it happen to me it is eerie. What is worse I wonder being shunned, or having a brand new speacial friend calling you to go out to lunch after feild service EVERY FREAKING SUNDAY when you dont even know their name?

    Yes, there was an effort, and still is, to contact inactive ones and stir them back to action. What is strange, is why many witnesses do the opposite and shun these ones, instead of trying to help them and get them back to meetings. Many times these shunned ones are ones who's ideas about the organisation has become common knowledge among the publishers, yet nothing judicially ever became of it for one reason or the other and so the publishers take it upon themselves to serve as the judicial commitee and DA them in their own hearts and actions towards them. Their "running ahead of Jehovah". Gumby
  • gumby
    gumby
    Gumbo - It's what the SuperRighteous do.

    You have a point there ConfusedThese are the ones who cannot tolerate negativity within, yet these same ones are ones who many times, fail in their obligations as witnesses as far as what exemplary stands for.

    Sometimes I think it is a normal human behavior to simply not be as close to ones who drift from a group that was used to having you around on a regular basis. You drift from them, and they drift from you.

    Multi level marketing was an example. When your a hotshot in the group and prospering, you have many friends, phone calls and invites.If you leave the group, these ones no longer pay you much attention. I realise of course that real close family and friends would not treat you this way.I suppose it's different reasons for different people and their situations.

    Gumby

  • Netty
    Netty

    Gumby, I did my fade between 18 - 15 years ago, I I was VERY shunned by my immediate family and by MOST but not all witnesses who would see me here and there. I dont think its anything new, it happened to me all those years ago. THey flip-flopped throughout the years, to where now I am mostly not shunned (still a little by a few SNOTTY jerks). As a matter of fact, when this happened to me recently, I was snubbed/shunned by someone I grew up with when my mom guilted me into going to a memorial about 3 or 4 years ago. My mother father and brother actually got upset with her for doing this to me, when years ago they did it themselves, go figure.

  • gumby
    gumby

    Hi Netty....nice to hear from you

    THey flip-flopped throughout the years, to where now I am mostly not shunned (still a little by a few SNOTTY jerks). As a matter of fact, when this happened to me recently, I was snubbed/shunned by someone I grew up with when my mom guilted me into going to a memorial about 3 or 4 years ago.

    Netty....do you suppose the reason some snub is ....they don't know what to say and just feel uncomfortable as to what they will say to you? Yes there are MANY who are plain assbites who ride high in the saddle and despise those who leave, but sometimes it's shyness, or ones who just don't want to deal with an uncomfortable situation. Whadya think ?

    As for your childhood friend, was she a snotty jerk, or a friend who couldn't accept her friend turning her back on her god Jehovah ...and it simply hurt her?

    Gumby

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