Posts by Iwasyoungonce

22

Detachment and Experimentation

by joelbear in

jw
friends

i don't know why i keep burdening this group.

no one else in my life can really relate to the intertwined emotions i am going through.

my bear friends are there, including mitch, and they they try to keep my cheered up.

Iwasyoungonce

Joel,

I plan to visit the gun store this weekend. Maybe the reality of holding a gun in my hand and understand the reality of what it could do to me will shock me out of this downward spiral

Been there done that. I know the pain when it seems that no one cares including you.

Don't do that. My Email is open if you want to vent or talk.

Do you find comfort in music? I think that Creed's "Torn" could be a theme album for this forum.

I was once told that when you think that you can not bear one more day then close the door to your house lock it and go accross the tracks and help someone. Joel is there a soup kitchen or any other type of place like that around your town? Maybe a nuring home or hospital? It may sound silly but you would be amazed at the change in your spirit.

A friend,

Jay

30

Upset

by Vivamus in

jw
friends

i am like an emotional screw up.

i am like a 17 year old with no ability to take harsh words in.

they upset me.

Iwasyoungonce

P.S. Viv.

I don't know if your dad is or is not a JW. Either way he is still wrong and owes you a major "I'm sorry."

30

Upset

by Vivamus in

jw
friends

i am like an emotional screw up.

i am like a 17 year old with no ability to take harsh words in.

they upset me.

Iwasyoungonce

V. Maybe I just have become jaded. But. when I hear stories like your that just "ring the bell" with my own experinces<sigh>. I was told that no son who has any respect for his elders would ever say anything bad about what the/his elders believe. I am a bigot for not being willing to go to a/nother bible study because I am scared of the truth. When family died they sent the one and only jw that I truly love and do actually respect to my front door under the false pretenses of "work." I look at them as people who were under me while we were rockclimbing. They could not or would not grab the rock. I had two choices. Keep trying and hoping that they will get a grip. Or, cut them loose and save myself. I chose to cut the rope. Sometimes it's all you can do. It is not about hate. It is about survival.

The Jehovah Witnesses are masters at playing on "others" emotions. I think it was mulan who talked about teaching some mormons a thing or two about grabing attention during prostalatzing. One step away from agitiation.

V. Remember that christian morality is an easy thing to prey on. I do not understand why we do not instill a clear sense of the difference between love, lust, and desire in this culture. They have so much more to do with spirituality than with sexuality.

"If" I were with you when your Dad said those things to you I would have called him a coward to his face. No parent who loves their child would make that child feel like dirt.

16

Who I Am

by yard dog in

i would like to start out by saying how glad i am to find a forum to discuss issues in my life very few people understand.

i hope to learn a few things and possibly make some new friends along the way.

i'm 34 years old and have been disfellowshipped for 17 years.

Iwasyoungonce

Hey dog!

# 1 You are not a criminal for not being a Jehovah Witness, They are criminal (spiritually speaking) for trying to possess your free will (spirit)

Your children like mine are best shielded from the evil that the Jehovah's would try to do to them. They would hurt them to get to you.

And here is something that I will ask you to consider. You say that you love "rightousness." OK being good is a good thing. But, instead of trying to be a rightous man try to be a loving man. All the laws of the land basicly cover the rightous. But to be a loving man, the spirits of your children will grow knowing the love of their father. That is the best gift you can give them. I assume that you are close with your wife, that longing for the love of your parents, give that love to your wife and your kids. They can and will give you 10 times the approval that your parents can not give because they are not allowed to give any love without the permission of the WT, their master. My mother once (often) told me that no religion no government and no act on my part could ever make her not love me. She would come and see me no matter where I am in life. She loves me no matter what. As a man in my 30's I have come to realize just how lucky I am to have her. I know I will be that kind of father to my children and that kind of husband to my wife.

I can say that I know one thing that I have learned from them (WT). I know that I want to be nothing like them.

I say all of this because there is such a lack of love, true love with the witnesses. And I know that they know it even if no one will admit it. It is hard to love when you have lived (grown up with) that kind of life. Legalism is not a way to live spiritually. The legal weasles were the enemy of Christ. The leagle end of relgion "living pure" very well could be the death of the very concept of it. And I think that would be a good thing. No one is going to be shamed into being loving. It does not work that way.

16

Greater Knowledge Begets Greater Responsibility

by IslandWoman in

jw
friends

i know this subject has been covered before but at the time it was i felt differently than i do now.

i used to feel that all of us are responsible for our actions and i should not place greater blame on elders, circuit and district overseers and governing body members.

i no longer feel that way.

Iwasyoungonce

IW,

Thank you. I agree.

"When one man says No I won't. Rome begins to fear." Spartacus

28

Do You Ever Think "The End" Will Happen?

by minimus in

jw
friends

or is it all jw bull?

Iwasyoungonce

Great minimus if the jw's have it right (finally) then I think they will be in deep do do on that day.

And your last comment. (Right on) Every generation.

For me there is some comfort in that.

Ever hear the term "Wait to worry?"

5

Have you ever...?

by Gig in

jw
friends

i just ordered steve hassan's books, combatting cult mind control and releasing the bonds.

have any of you read either of them and have any comment...particularly about his strategic interactive approach?

thanks in advance.. gig

Iwasyoungonce

Yes Gig I have read both books. If you want to understand why the cult mind does what it does they are fantastic. If you want to save the cult mind from itself that is another story. If you want to have your own mind and be able to make desions around the cult mentality it is good too. Just remember that it may quickly come to the point where you are threatened or someone (they the cult members) becomes quite physical. (did with me) Even in the book it says say your peice and get out. You stay in control of what you listen too. Remeber that NO is an acceptable answer or response.

The #1 things that the books did for me was it explained why the cultie became so angry when I like offered to take or send them on vacations. I subscribe to the "Tom Peters" way of operating my business. He says that doing things like mini vactions are a great way to keep your employees happy and they with you. So I offered trips to my jw employee. She acted like I punched her in the gut. Now I know that an SIA will include offering a "vacation." And that trip is a front to try to deprogram the little cultie.

To bad for the little girl though. I had no idea what a SIA was. I was just offering a trip to keep my employee happy. Even though she was family she would have never been worth all the money it would cost to do a SIA by professionals. And, without the book I did an SIA type interaction with my family. The result was being threatened with my car being blown up. (for real) I have no contact with them now. And I am quite happy. I have no desire to have relations again. It is the best way for all of us to have the best relations; To not have any. I recommend the books for you. To prepare you for the world that you live in. Don't read the books to "free" others. Make sure that you are free in mind, soul, and body. One of the best ways that we can fight is to have a life that others wish they could have. Then tell them that they can if they want to, support them and believe in them. Ultimatly we are all responsible for ourselves and our own happiness. No matter how hard we try we can not please others if they choose to be unhappy in all circumstances.

Happy day,

Jay

P.S. "If you belive that you exist in the one true religion and dismiss all others then you are 99% athiest and only have one more religion to go."

15

Snitchers?

by Brumm in

jw
friends

i read a few apostate books during my research as a jw...after confessing in private to a best friend that i'd read them i got snitched on and they ran and told the elders....prats!

this led to a judicial and a 6 month probation, wasnt allowed to do carpark duty (sobs) or michrophone duty (baawl) for 6 months nor could i answer up at meetings which led to tongue wagging, could go on doors though... a bit strict huh.. also know of a 6 year old who handed in her dad for speaking to apostates!

was you snitched on?

Iwasyoungonce

Brumm,

I'm not a witness and I don't snitch period. It is sad how hungry the jw's in my little circle were for someone they could trust. Someone who would listen to them and give free advice without having to wonder if they should kill them after telling them their thoughts. It was amazing how after doing that they were so quick to turn on other people who are just starving like they were. But I know this is just a part of the cult cycle of abuse. And it goes round and round until someone on it decides to break it.

Otherwise, wack!!! THANK YOU MADAM MAY I HAVE ANOTHER wack!!! THANK YOU MADAM MAY I HAVE ANOTHER wack!!!......

20

Need Help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

by Bendrr in

jw
friends

yes your old pal bendrr has gone and done it this time!

i've committed myself to hosting christmas day at my place and that includes cooking a christmas dinner for at least 11 people.. i already planned on my "adopted" family coming over which would be no big deal, just snacks and a few beers.

but this year i spent thanksgiving with my older brother and his family.

Iwasyoungonce

Here is a link.

http://www.angiesrealm.com/christmas/recipes/xmas-dinners.html (Looks good to me) And there are more cooking mags out there for ideas than wts. (Well, maybe not)

One thing that we do at my house is a gift exchange that is a lot of fun.

The rules can vary but this year my rules are the gift has to be "Hot" "Spicey"
and "soft." Other times it has been open but under $10.00. Once it was anything goes accept popcorn and free movie rentals.

I plan to have a secret prize for the best gift given and a boobie prize for the worst. The gift exchange has become the highlight of Xmas for us. Everyone is involved and having fun for about 1/2 the night with it.

Final tip. Don't stress. Use booze if nessesary. Don't stress.

11

"Meaning" (for donkey's never-ending ...

by Blueblades in

jw
friends

donkey,"meaning" is the most stirring of all spiritual impulses.

(helmut thielicke.

)what is "meaning"?why do we want it?.how do we get it?is it an actual quality in reality to be discerned or something we project upon that realty from within,or only a never-to-be-fulfilled longing of the human heart?whatever it is, it offers one of the most powerful reasons for continuing the human experiment.its possibility is, simply,a reason to live---its absence,a reason to give up living.our appetite for meaning is insatiable, our anxiety over its elusiveness never ending.

Iwasyoungonce

The problem is that people like the Muslems find this cause and it is to kill all the wicked people like us who don't subcribe to their god. This living for some other power and giving our life and others for this purpose is not good. There is no answer that will suit everyone's need for a future life, at least it hasn't been found by me.

Ken P.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________

Islam, Judaism, Christianity all share more than the story of Abraham. They all see everything from their perceptions of what is right and what is wrong, what is good and what is bad. Only the hurt that was inflicted upon them by others matters. They all believe that they are oppressed while ignoring the oppression that they themselves are doing.

I like to walk amongst the religions. My faith is mine. I can share with you my faith but I will never submit to a man who wishes to take my faith which flows freely from me and make me submit to an earthly license that permits him to sell me back my faith like a bottle of water. I really do see dogma as synthetic faith. Faith in a bottle. I would rather be around a pagan with real faith any day or an atheist who has existential faith than any religious zealot who is incapable of thinking or dreaming for themselves.