It's a religion not a bank. If it made some changes would you re-affiliate?
appeasing'friends and family'
isn't that part of the human condition?
after my last post where i asked for advice on how to handle whether i should tell an elder that we've been going to church, i decided to tell a local elder who's related to me through marriage.
this was to save my dad having to 'report' me (i'd told my dad we go to church).
anyway, i had an interesting chat with him and he said some very personally revealing things re.
It's a religion not a bank. If it made some changes would you re-affiliate?
appeasing'friends and family'
isn't that part of the human condition?
after my last post where i asked for advice on how to handle whether i should tell an elder that we've been going to church, i decided to tell a local elder who's related to me through marriage.
this was to save my dad having to 'report' me (i'd told my dad we go to church).
anyway, i had an interesting chat with him and he said some very personally revealing things re.
It's great that you and Gail feel so empowered by what's happened, long may it continue.
It's also fascinating reading the responses and the whole fade versus DA/DF conundrum. There isn't one really, it's what fits best for you. I'm not DA or DF but nor can I say I faded. Resigned as an elder one week and halted meetings a fortnight later and I'm sure I'm not the only one. My departure apparently damaged the congregation too, much tears etc and predictably some I was friends with left later. Life post JW is also a personal thing, no matter what your departure. I've come across DA and DF and faded individuals who are still defined by the JW experience, and those that aren't at all. Horses for courses.
Isn't a battle with the WT a little like the war on terror or raging against Western hegemony?
after my last post where i asked for advice on how to handle whether i should tell an elder that we've been going to church, i decided to tell a local elder who's related to me through marriage.
this was to save my dad having to 'report' me (i'd told my dad we go to church).
anyway, i had an interesting chat with him and he said some very personally revealing things re.
Hope it leaves you and Gail feeling good Mark.
so i have been having problems with the renters that moved in next door.
the last 3 months have been a living hell.
i have an ongoing complaint with the slumlord that owns the property and the city is taking him to court for derelict vehicles next week (which i anonymously complained about, but i am sure i am being blamed for).
grim indeed.
so i have been having problems with the renters that moved in next door.
the last 3 months have been a living hell.
i have an ongoing complaint with the slumlord that owns the property and the city is taking him to court for derelict vehicles next week (which i anonymously complained about, but i am sure i am being blamed for).
If you cannot do this right now because it is too difficult, or if you will not do this because you are a man and will stand your ground, then arm yourself. Get a gun and learn to shoot it. You can get a good used 38SPL revolver for under $250.00. You don't need anything fancy. Learn to shoot it, trust it, love it. Have good quality hollowpoint bullets in it.
No one should be physically intimidated or violated--even those that are not physically strong--and the gun is the great equalizer. You don't need advanced martial arts skills to use a gun, and only basic aiming skills to use it to devastating effect at short ranges. It puts even a woman on equal footing with a man. If this man comes across onto your property to harm you again, shoot him. Possibly the mere sight of the weapon will make him fall back.
Am I the only lily livered wimp that feels ill reading this advice?
i have been wrestling with the idea of da'ing myself for close to a year now.
but there is a small area in my subconscious that whispers "this is not a good idea.
i haven't been to a meeting in over six months, no service in seven years.
The elders in my congregation "respected" people who DAed themselves and thought that those that faded were weak. So if the opinion of JWs matters to you, go ahead. They're opinion didn't matter to me, I respected myself.
for those who haven't read 'my story' thus far, here are the links;.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/159554/1.ashx.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/159683/1.ashx.
Do we want any of this hanging over us, or is a clean break the solution?
It's all about how you percieve it. Ignore it I'd say, and keep away from the people that feed you all the JW nonsense about witch hunts/dirt digging etc. it's now got nowt to do with you. Or rather it has much to do with you as you want. Might mean being coolish with your parents but the alternative is probably no contact at all.
I'm not suggesting that the Alpha concept is a cult, just that you're not hasty. I've had 2 friends (nonJW) join then leave because of pressure to conform, but that was a couple of years ago and the group you attend might be quite different.
"normal human behaviour" includes JW behaviour in my experience. "normal" runs the gamut of human behaviour.
for those who haven't read 'my story' thus far, here are the links;.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/159554/1.ashx.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/159683/1.ashx.
I'm sure Alpha are different from JWs but they still had the same feel to me. Initial visits to a KH are often warm and friendly etc etc...
With regard to DAing, I'm not sure how you see yourself currently being connected to the name Jehovah if you've already left. You know that your hardcore family will read your DA in whatever way they wish - evidence of pride/arrogance or whatever that they've always seen in you and I never heard of any witness that DAed or was DFed that made me "think" while I was a JW. It was my old pals that had left, avoided being cut off and got back in touch with me after some time that aided my departure. Not through de-culting me, but through being normal, having moved on and being supportive and non-judgemental. If they had been DAed I would not have let them back in to my life when I did
It's early days for you and I'm hoping that I don't sound patronising but I'm suggesting that you think ahead. It's nigh on impossible to send a clear message by DAing, they see what they're told to see.
By letting your kids see that you can change your mind about something and still be a lving dad is more important than letting them know where they stand. Life, the world, is wonderfully messy and complicated and making a stand is sometimes not the best move.
"Shut up and eff off Euan" yeah, i hear you!
for those who haven't read 'my story' thus far, here are the links;.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/159554/1.ashx.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/159683/1.ashx.
Sam and I have opened a book on how long before you are an atheist. I say within 6 months as you are a bright guy who moves fast and isn't scared of change :-)
I'm with Paul
And I''d therefore forget about DAing yourself. I'm not DAed, definitely involved in "wrong doing", and never look over my shoulder. One benefit is that other flakey JWs can still contact you before they've made the final break which would be harder for them if you DA.
Intrigued by the Alpha choice. I've visited them and it had the feel of the JWs all over it - but then I'm a non believer and so my perspective is quite different from yours. We've got a newish church here called Destiny that's real happy clappy and expansionist but I haven't manged to visit them yet.
Good luck!
well, what is your scottish experience and if you like, where are you from?
currently hiding from the elders here in this caveany spiders in that cave.......sounds a bit like robert the bruce :)
Hope his heart isn't buried in a wee lead box....