Posts by BNG-713

25

Involved(ish) with a JW Man.

by BNG-713 in

i know there are several posts about witnesses and non-witnesses in regards to relationships.

i couldn’t find anything specifically that spoke to me, so i would love some third-party advice and thoughts.. i have never been someone to pursue a stranger from the internet.

earlier this year, i became friends with someone on a video game.

Sorry, I have been MIA. Lot’s of valuable stuff here. I nipped everything in the bud last night and cancelled my trip itinerary today. I couldn’t shake the feeling that no matter how happy we make each other now that so much could go wrong should we enter a relationship. I know we care for each other deeply at this point in time, but the chances of making each other happy after all the new wears off was slim to none. I am hurting like a MF’er, drowning in what if’s, and really hope I made the right decision. We have chosen to remain friends. Does that seem risky?

25

Involved(ish) with a JW Man.

by BNG-713 in

i know there are several posts about witnesses and non-witnesses in regards to relationships.

i couldn’t find anything specifically that spoke to me, so i would love some third-party advice and thoughts.. i have never been someone to pursue a stranger from the internet.

earlier this year, i became friends with someone on a video game.

BNG-713

Neither of us want kids. We both unfortunately cane from backgrounds where we had to help our family with raising them so it was nice that he was as burnt out on children as I was. He is also aware I’m getting my tubes tied.

Emotional maturity has definitely been a concern. While he seems mature and communicates very effectively; I feel like I wont really know til I’m around him.

I have addressed the head of household thing and explained I’m interested in a partner, not a leader. He was receptive to that and claims he has no intention on being my boss.

I was very surprised his parents didn’t tell him to stop entertaining the idea of this, and haven’t tried to forbid him from our meet up. Are open minded parents common? They are both witnesses as well, as are 3 of their kids. Their oldest son left and claims he’s an atheist but they still communicate with him and involve him in family activities.

25

Involved(ish) with a JW Man.

by BNG-713 in

i know there are several posts about witnesses and non-witnesses in regards to relationships.

i couldn’t find anything specifically that spoke to me, so i would love some third-party advice and thoughts.. i have never been someone to pursue a stranger from the internet.

earlier this year, i became friends with someone on a video game.

BNG-713

So, here goes nothing. I know there are several posts about witnesses and non-witnesses in regards to relationships. I couldn’t find anything specifically that spoke to me, so I would love some third-party advice and thoughts.

I have never been someone to pursue a stranger from the Internet. Earlier this year, I became friends with someone on a video game. Always a good time, and we just chatted as Friends would. Fast forward six months, we exchanged phone numbers and started talking outside of the video game. We have talked everyday for the past 7 weeks. Things progressed rather quickly, and we are not in a relationship, but there has been a ton of flirting and talking about the future. I found out a week in that he was a baptized witness. I am in Florida, and he is in California. I am actually going to meet him on September 6. We both agreed that we should not make a decision on what this could or could not be without meeting, and his parents do know he’s talking to me. I am not a secret by any means. His parents are leaving this up to him. As we get closer to my visit, the nervousness and second thoughts are creeping in for both of us. A couple weeks ago he did have a bit Of an internal conflict. He felt as though pursuing this may hurt his God, or compromise his relationship down the line with his religion. He studied, sought counsel, and prayed about it… And said that it does come with a risk, but something is telling him not to just let this go. So he wants to meet before we make a final decision. I will be staying at a hotel for a few days, where we will spend the days together, but of course not the nights. We have both confirmed feelings for each other, and we both know what we like about the other person. That was something that was important to me, because if you don’t have legitimate reasons for liking someone… It’s just a crush and not something that needs to be pursued and invested in, IMO. We have talked about how his faith would affect our relationship Should one come about, and have similar views on expectations of how it would work while we are apart and what kind of end goal we would want should we be successful. We want similar things out of life. It feels crazy to me that in less than two weeks I will finally be meeting him, and I’m terrified. Long distance paired with differences in faith is going to be hard. I sometimes feel like if I go there and it doesn’t work out, I would be getting off easy in a way. The closer we get to the date, the further apart I feel like we are growing. We talked today And sort of came clean to each other about how nervous we both are. We both still like each other and still want to meet, but have chosen to draw back on the flirting to prepare for what texting in a relationship may be like because I told him talking 24/7 and flirting a majority of the time is not sustainable and is a recipe for failure. I know this is a little jumbled and a lot of information, but I want to know what others experienced in jw/ non jw relationships may have to say. Like I said, we aren’t deciding on anything until we meet and confirm that the feelings are still there in person, but I still want advice and information on this matter in case it does work. Oh, And we have shared a tons of pictures as well as had many video chats confirming no one is getting catfished lol. I am also moving to Colorado in February so we won’t be a whole country apart.

If we have the same chemistry in person, I honestly feel like he is someone I could fall in love with, and he has agreed with me on that. I do want to be reasonable though and consider things I may not be able to think of on my own.

Thank you all for reading.

Side note, I am freshly 27 and he is 22. Also, financially speaking we could see each other every month.