Posts by ShadesofGrey

45

Unconditional love?

by Snoozy in

whatever happened to "unconditional love"?.

why is it today so many are willing to shun a friend or relative because they are just too much trouble or they do something that irritates them.... they claim that the other person is "not healty for them" or "harmful to their mental health" be it a relative or a goof friend.

too ready to write them off so to speak.. what happened to the kind of unconditional love that loves in good and bad times..... i don't get it... i guess "unconditional love" doesn't exist anymore.

ShadesofGrey

If someone is so abusive and toxic that it ruins your life to deal with them... then I don't think that changes anything Snoozy.

:(

260

Are you sure leaving the JW religion has made your life better?. Lurkers think twice

by mankkeli in

on this forum, i have carefully read most of the experiences of those who left the jw religion, i have even read experiences that have dated back to 2001, i have read the different circumstances surrounding their exits and what ensued upon leaving.

for the majority, i observed they are better remainning in the religion than leaving.

what benefit is there to strain family relationship because you want to be free?, please tell me, of what value is that freedom?,.

ShadesofGrey

Being a JW has taught my daughter to be afraid of death, afraid of the "Great Tribulation" and Armageddon, and afraid that her classmates will all die. If I stay in I am doing that to her. I hope I am a better parent than that. I hope that I love her enough to do better.

This post below is excellent, thank you size.

Being JW takes away all of them . . . honesty, reality, love and freedom.

It takes away honesty by forcing children to lie to avoid a beating, to say they love something they don't believe or enjoy. It forces people to lie to remain in a united family, or have any family contact at all. It teaches a lie. And then teaches us to tell it to others. We get to live a lie.

It takes away reality by creating a false world for us to live in where everyone else is evil. We can't do this, we can't do that, we can't wear this, we can't watch that, we can't go here, but we must do this. All the time the "real" world is out there somewhere else. False hopes, false dreams, false friends are all this false world of theirs has to offer. What else can come from it but disappointment? Because it's just not fuckin' real!

It takes away love by having us say goodbye to "worldly" friends and relatives. Good honest people who we should be loving. It replaces it with lovers who have different reasons than the former for loving us. After waking up we see it as a very poor quality of love. Why? . . . because love we find outside is real love . . . yes, love out there in the world is a far better quality love. It's real love.

Being JW takes away our freedom. They take away our freedom to choose, to think, to say, to do, to go . . . it's all laid out by someone else. It all has consequences, ugly consequences. It's psychological, intellectual and arguably physical slavery . . . how much more freedom can you lose?

Freedom is truly known . . . by the captive who has flown. Honesty, reality, love and freedom. Do you really understand the value of these things?

55

sincere question .....What could make you believe in God ?

by caliber in

please discuss why you don't believe in god and that which could convince you to believe in god ??

?.

ShadesofGrey

How do you know? The bible is unreliable by your own admission. So how do you know what he said?

It isn't that I think the Bible is unreliable. It is that someone who is not Born of God does not have the Spirit to direct them to understand it or use it correctly. (and no, unlike the JW belief, I am not part of some small group of Christians who are the only ones to correctly interpret things, see 1 John 5:1)

There are many true words of God and Christ in the Bible. Then there are things that David said, or things that Lot did, etc. that God doesn't necessarily approve of. Just because God wanted something written down is not the same as Him saying it. I just think that there are also words of people and recorded history that God does not necessarily approve of, and there are also things that are misunderstood. The problem is when someone without the Spirit takes them the wrong way or out of context. "the dead know nothing at all" is way out of context. It wasn't meant to be a true statement! Jehu tricking people and slaughtering them? That is just history, not something we should copy. Paul saying that women should be quiet? Numerous explanations. Many Christians do research on these things because they know God. They know that these things aren't to be taken at face value. And it isn't difficult to figure out really... Christ himself told us what to think of the Mosaic Law, and in the OT when God said something, then the Bible says that He did. HTH!

41

Inactive, yet shunned!

by TimothyT in

my dad (49) (who was an elder for 10 year and hasnt been to the meetings now since april when i stopped going) sent a message to a younger unbaptised brother (19) in my congregation to see if they would like to get together and jam on their guitars.

the younger brother responded that he would like to but since my dad hasnt been to the meetings in a long time he feels its innapropriate.. needless to say my dad was a little pi**ed but at the same time he cant understand how he is also now being shunned despite the fact that he isnt even disfellowshipped.

why do these people show such conditional love when jesus taught the absolute opposite?.

ShadesofGrey

"Inactive" means "weak" - some may want to help you get stronger, others may avoid you so the ilk doesn't get on their nice clothes. Now, as long as a person keeps his mouth shut and takes whatever bones are thrown to him, a few will acknowledge the existence of a "weak" one from time to time.

Then there are those that really like to talk about truth - that's when you cross the line and become an apostate..... someone very, very dangerous and not weak at all.

Most people are very easily manipulated into doing just about anything, that's just the sad reality of the human condition.

Yeah, when I was not yet aware of the TATT someone the same age as us invited me to a movie and kept calling me frequently, saying that it was wrong for the other congregation members to ignore me. My husband warned me that I was her pet project. Well, a few weeks later Christ brought me completely mentally out of the Org. As soon as I told her I was happy with my relationship with God, she said that I had a superior attitude and cut me off. :( Stupid mind-control.

41

Inactive, yet shunned!

by TimothyT in

my dad (49) (who was an elder for 10 year and hasnt been to the meetings now since april when i stopped going) sent a message to a younger unbaptised brother (19) in my congregation to see if they would like to get together and jam on their guitars.

the younger brother responded that he would like to but since my dad hasnt been to the meetings in a long time he feels its innapropriate.. needless to say my dad was a little pi**ed but at the same time he cant understand how he is also now being shunned despite the fact that he isnt even disfellowshipped.

why do these people show such conditional love when jesus taught the absolute opposite?.

ShadesofGrey

It is so good to see you Timmy!

Oh wow, I will have to save this one Blondie, thank you. Ridiculous, but I did see it being played out.

a Christian personally chooses to limit association with another whose ways or attitudes are not good—for example, one who seems excessively focused on recreation

260

Are you sure leaving the JW religion has made your life better?. Lurkers think twice

by mankkeli in

on this forum, i have carefully read most of the experiences of those who left the jw religion, i have even read experiences that have dated back to 2001, i have read the different circumstances surrounding their exits and what ensued upon leaving.

for the majority, i observed they are better remainning in the religion than leaving.

what benefit is there to strain family relationship because you want to be free?, please tell me, of what value is that freedom?,.

ShadesofGrey

If my house is on fire I don't wait for a better one to come along before I run....and I'll do my best to rescue my family too!

I love this point. It is worth repeating!

283

Are you sure leaving is a wise decision ?- Lurkers think twice- Part 2

by mankkeli in

in the previous thread of this series, i called lurkers attention to the need of being discreet when contemplating an exit from the jw religion.

i mentioned that the thread was borne as a result of the general observations i made reading old posts here and discussing with many ex-jws and their lives have gradually turned out.

that thread alone was visited more than 2,980 times and graced with 204 contributions.

ShadesofGrey

I wouldnt want anyone to walk down that hideous path because of an aggresive need for ”freedom”. I repeat again, of what value is that freedom if it comes along with loneliness, depression, sleepness night and many horrible circumstances?. Please tell me what is the big deal about that freedom?. You may think there is light at the end of the tunnel, but you may not even survive the journey to see that light.

Well quite a few of us were fighting severe depression as a result of or exaserbated by that religion. The JW organization emphasizes fear and shame. We had no friends until we started allowing ourselves outside association, and then the active JWs attacked us for that.

Two active JWs that I was close to committed suicide, one of them a young pioneer, the other active in the congregation, and my active JW mother threatens suicide and complains of depression often.

Many, many JWs fight depression and many, many exJWs report that it is gone.

Whatever view any individual may claim to present, the reality is that leaving the organization is not a suggestion that should be offered to anyone who has become dissapointed or disillusioned one way or the other.

I am pretty good with telling anyone to get out of a destructive cult.

Consider your steps carefully before taking it.

Yes, most definitely, especially open steps.

I really don't care what Ray Franz did. Jesus rescued me from the cult before I read one page of apostate material. And besides that, I think I know better than to follow any man ever again.

45

Unconditional love?

by Snoozy in

whatever happened to "unconditional love"?.

why is it today so many are willing to shun a friend or relative because they are just too much trouble or they do something that irritates them.... they claim that the other person is "not healty for them" or "harmful to their mental health" be it a relative or a goof friend.

too ready to write them off so to speak.. what happened to the kind of unconditional love that loves in good and bad times..... i don't get it... i guess "unconditional love" doesn't exist anymore.

ShadesofGrey

Thanks. That was actually me, not Mrs. J. My mom is abusive to everyone, most of all my Dad. She is mentally ill and not being treated for it. She has consistently caused problems. Talking to her is not an option as it does no good. I wish I could help her... perhaps if she would believe that she is forgiven she could stop controlling everyone so fiercely. But every time I go over there, personally, even without the kids, I break down, for like, a week. She abuses my Dad and no one will stop it, least of all him. She has managed to cut him off from almost all of his friends and family. I have tried and am helpless to do anything more about it. Many well-meaning people think that I can show her the love that I have found outside of the cult. I have tried, but it is just too damaging to even deal with her at all right now.

I apologize for the hi-jack.

260

Are you sure leaving the JW religion has made your life better?. Lurkers think twice

by mankkeli in

on this forum, i have carefully read most of the experiences of those who left the jw religion, i have even read experiences that have dated back to 2001, i have read the different circumstances surrounding their exits and what ensued upon leaving.

for the majority, i observed they are better remainning in the religion than leaving.

what benefit is there to strain family relationship because you want to be free?, please tell me, of what value is that freedom?,.

ShadesofGrey

Negative view of life

From its inception the Watchtower Society consistently has been preaching doom and how unliveable life is.

Watchtower 1894 July 15 p.227 "… Our readers are writing to know if there may not be a mistake in the 1914 date. They say that they do not see how present conditions can hold out so long under the strain."

260

Are you sure leaving the JW religion has made your life better?. Lurkers think twice

by mankkeli in

on this forum, i have carefully read most of the experiences of those who left the jw religion, i have even read experiences that have dated back to 2001, i have read the different circumstances surrounding their exits and what ensued upon leaving.

for the majority, i observed they are better remainning in the religion than leaving.

what benefit is there to strain family relationship because you want to be free?, please tell me, of what value is that freedom?,.

ShadesofGrey

None of you have found greener pastures of spiritual nourishment in any other organization since leaving Jehovah's Witnesses. You delude yourselves into thinking that you're happy by participating in pagan holidays and selfish days of celebration such as birthday parties. True, no one gets their head chopped off during modern birthday parties, but what gets lost during these celebrations is what Jesus highlighted about giving freely, particulary to God. We recieve freely, and hence we should give freely. That being said, we should not celebrate the life that we recieved during a birthday party, but rather we should show how much we value our physical vessels by joining other True Christians in the full time ministry. Only that will bring us real joy, and give us sustenance.

In a sense, by leaving JWs and the direction of the Faithful & Discreet Slave, those who have done so have turned their lives into a 24/7 birthday party full of selfish desires and soon will recieve the full recompense for their error.

I have to respond to this. Spiritual nourishment does not come from an organization. It comes from Christ my Lord, THE LORD. Accepting Him as my only mediator as the scripture says has changed my life. My heart sings with gladness and light.

I have gone to a church about 4 times because it is hard to come out of a cult and have your family to deal with, but Christ led me to that church after I was born again. When I have gone I am very encouraged and strengthened. For years while I was in the JW org I would have to strengthen myself to withstand the negative onslaught from the meetings.

Many many people have reached out to me in love and self-sacrifice and I have also reached out to others, including JWs who are thrown about without their shepherd. JWs are the selfish ones. Never showing up at the hospital or helping friends move because they have to get their hours in, well I don't have hours to get in. I will be there for my friends because I love them.