JBean

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Posts by JBean

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  7

  Holiday Advice

  by Kay Francis in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm new to this forum and badly in need of advice.

  my husband and i left the organization over four years ago, but unfortunately have left many family members behind.

  in fact, my mother is still an active jw but pretty much follows her own agenda.

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  JBean

  I say let her and all of them visit. Hey... she was the one who was asking about social activities, right? Plan something fun! She may not want to admit it but she is probably DYING to let loose and have a good time. If she asks to have fun... let her have fun. She probably got all upset with you 'cos you "ruined" her plans when you brought up her religion. : ) You never know, if your husband and you show her a good time... house being decorated for the holidays, holiday music on the stereo, etc. (hey, it's your house, right?) she may soften to it all. I'd give it a shot if I were you! If she starts bringing up the JW faith, you can just politely tell her the holidays are not the time for such discussions. Seriously, it sounds as if she wants to have a bit of fun away from the organization. : ) Jbean
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  28

  Divorce? Help please.

  by Mulan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  we have a close relative who has left her jw husband.

  he is extremely controlling, and emotionally abusive.

  their children are grown.

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  JBean

  I'm very, very sorry that your relative is going through what is actually two divorces in one. Leaving a marriage is hard, then having it compounded by leaving an organization and possibly losing association with your kids (their choice obviously) must be especially difficult. My only thought here, while she works through this herself, is to be her support. Try to keep her busy mentally, emotionally and socially if you can (hopefully she lives close by). I don't know how or what the abuse she's suffered is, but if she had a choice, I would say to not return to either situation! I know this isn't direct assistance, but in time she will feel better about her choices.
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  42

  Did Crisis of Conscience damage you?

  by Mulan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it has been suggested, by a man we know, that those who read crisis of conscience, are left with a feeling of despair and are "cast adrift" after reading it.

  it is his opinion that the book shouldn't have been written, because it does harm to people.

  i do not agree, and would like to hear from anyone who has an opinion to share, so i can print all this out and show it to him.. comments, everyone, please????

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  JBean

  Thank you Joy2! I just may do that! : )
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  36

  ANYONE IN SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP WITH JW

  by Serena in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  has anyone had any interfaith relationship with a jw that actually worked?

  or are they all doomed from day one?

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  JBean

  The answer is yes... but only if the JW is the type to be layed-back about things and both individuals are good at compromise. Seeker's life seems to be working well now and I agree with a lot of his points. I spent YEARS trying to convert my hubby (I was born & raised in the faith)... we eventually divorced but not because of religion... lots of other crazy stuff. SInce then I have had 3 long-term boyfriends (all non-JW)...friends/family know about this but don't give me toooo many problems... don't ask me how I manage this! : ) Maybe because I went through a messy divorce and they're afraid I'll crack! hee! Also maybe because they forced the issue of not dating my ex and I married him... now they may think that if they let me do what I want, I won't marry these guys. I dunno. Anyway... all are completely unaware that I've had it with the organization and wouldn't spend a moment of my time in trying to convert the guy I'm with now. So for those of you who are in a relationship (or considering one) with a JW, I guess it depends on how strict they are. You can only tell by having open communication... and remember my example... years and years of trying to force the other person to change... and now look! : )
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  42

  Did Crisis of Conscience damage you?

  by Mulan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it has been suggested, by a man we know, that those who read crisis of conscience, are left with a feeling of despair and are "cast adrift" after reading it.

  it is his opinion that the book shouldn't have been written, because it does harm to people.

  i do not agree, and would like to hear from anyone who has an opinion to share, so i can print all this out and show it to him.. comments, everyone, please????

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  JBean

  Hi! Great thread! I am about 1/2 way through CoC and absolutely LOVE it. I haven't been to a "regularly scheduled meeting" for about a year now... but all family is "in" and constantly encouraging me to get regular. (I'm not too lonely as I have a large circle of non-JW friends whom I adore!) ANyhow... I so want to share this book with my mom and dad, who were "in" since their childhood in the 40's & 50's... so they have (at least my dad, who was an elder almost his entire life!) read some of the older publications like the Finished Mystery, etc. I cannot understand why these two intelligent individuals haven't caught on yet about the "truth" of the Troof!!!! After getting through just a bit of Ray's book, I want to have my folks read it... but they are up in years and I can tell by the look on their faces (and the slightly panicked look about the eyes) when I voice my disagreements with the "society" lately, that they just MAY be afraid to face the facts at this late stage in the game. It is just sooooo very sad. My parents both could've had wonderful careers if it weren't for the society telling them that the "end" was due any moment!!!! They are still having to work.. yup, you guessed it... cleaning jobs!!! In fact, my mom remembers thinking that I wouldn't even make grade school... um...not only have I graduated but I'm now 40! So sad. They passed a comment the other day relating to "will we be "ready" when the end comes...are they doing enough!!!?? I said absolutely not... if it comes no one will be actually ready and that I felt that they were missing the point of the entire thing. That no one really knows what God has in store and how he'll read hearts. I told them that I think they are going to get a big surprise. They were not very happy with my thoughts. : ) But I digress... I think Ray was one of the most honest and couragest of men back then in Brooklyn. I would love to thank him in person... it's slow going, but his book is helping. Does anyone know if he ever visits these boards? Jbean
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  13

  What is the most important thing to know?

  by sleepy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  if there was just one piece of information you could pass on to another what is the most important thing you can think of that a person should know?.

  i would say "never stop learning".. also what subject gives the most enlightenment on life ?.

  i would say physics as everything branches from there.

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  JBean

  This may sound harsh, but I would pass on: Just because you love someone, doesn't mean you can (or were meant to) be with them. Love without anything else doesn't necessarily make everything ok. Jbean
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  24

  What do you think?

  by BobsGirl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am needing a catchy name for a niche catering business.. i thought of "the home cookery" .... but i'm not sure if that is quite right.

  any suggestions oh creative ones?.

  bobsgirl.

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  JBean

  How about something that they'll "feel" when ordering your dinners? A name along the lines of : Comfort 1st Catering? Just a thought! (I also love the "We Cook, You Eat Catering Co. idea!)
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  9

  A Blast From My Past!

  by Farkel in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  freepeace sent me some photos of our old neighborhood.

  i haven't yet asked him when they were taken, but from the clothing and hair styles, i would guess early-mid 1960's.. .

  this is a picture of the kh i attended as a lad.

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  JBean

  Farkel: Awesome pics! Thanks! I LOVE your comment "There I was, you sent me, now I'm screwed".... priceless! : )
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  16

  Do you still think like a witness.

  by sleepy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  one of my customers asked me today whether i celebrate christmas and birthdays almost automaticly i was about to say no.. then i realised i'm not a witness anymore.. i didn't really want to go into a conversaion so i just said those things didn't bother me.. so what things are here stuck in our minds like that ,that are hard to get rid of?.

  do you sill have a feeling arrmagddon might come , even though you don't mentally bleive it ,does it still effect you?.

  have you realised yet that you are not going to live forever and in fact you will die?.

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  JBean

  I love festivities of any kind so holidays, etc. never bothered me. The one thing that does bother me is the thought of dying. I really, really think living forever on a paradise earth is a great idea! I lived my entire life believing and hoping in that, so I'm really sad to think that it may or may not ever happen, in any sense, for anyone, no matter what they are doing with their lives. Jbean
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  78

  Watchtower Propaganda

  by JosephAlward in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  many have argued that articles in awake!

  in recent years show that watchtower was letting itself be told what do by the purple beast, namely, promote the united nations in its writings.

  i can understand how many might quickly find support for this claim, for there are, indeed, many articles in awake!

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  JBean

  As a current JW (abeit inactive one), let me just say this to Joe Alward: The simple fact that this is an issue AT ALL just sickens me and has pretty much nailed the coffin shut on my faith is what is SUPPOSEDLY God's earthly organization. Rem was absolutely correct in his comments that most JW's are absolutely IGNORANT! I know I was. And I know ALL of my current JW friends and family would NEVER believe that the WBTS would have ANY TYPE of link to the UN. ID card, entry pass, library card... call it what you will. It just is so hypocritical it's frightening. Well, 'nuff said.