I just remembered that you said you work 2nd shift w/ no family nearby. Oh, that is a problem too. So, if the kids are at school all day, then you are leaving for work when they get home. That is not in your favor. I hope you can talk to the boss about your situation and change shifts. Otherwise, I guess that you'd get week-end visitation unless you hired a nanny. You wouldn't see your kids much though. This is a tough one. I failed to ask you if you want custody of the children. I don't think that you brought it up, are we just assuming?? Where is your family located?? Have you considered moving closer to them with your kids? dj
Posts by DJ
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26It's been awhile, PLEASE HELP
by apostate man init's been about 6 months since my last post.
what a world of shit i am in now.. some of you may recall a thread i started on my problems with my wife found here at http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.aspx?id=24462&site=3 .
a little update first.
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26
It's been awhile, PLEASE HELP
by apostate man init's been about 6 months since my last post.
what a world of shit i am in now.. some of you may recall a thread i started on my problems with my wife found here at http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.aspx?id=24462&site=3 .
a little update first.
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DJ
Thi Chi......hi, I'm sorry but i disagree about the custody issue. The mother is an alcoholic, that will definately play a big role in deciding who is best to care for the kids. Don't you think?
Apostate man,
So sorry to hear about his. I am a Christian xjw and I understand your question about the 'satanic demeanor'. I would also urge you NOT to bring those words into court. You will be the one who is thought of as crazy by the judge. I understand your emotions and I honestly have to say that, I agree with you on some level. The pyramidology, and the Johannes Greber and John1:1 issues, ETC.....are nothing to make light of or dismiss. I agree with you if you are saying that some of their doctrine is based on spirit mediums and new light from who knows who?? I think it is a dangerous cult too. I just would not say that to your family because it will only cause them to hate you and they will almost enjoy the 'persecution'. If you are sure that divorce is what you want, then my advice is to go with the facts. She is an alcoholic and her religion does endanger your children and I think that the judge will see that.
I would also like to remind you that your kids probably love their mommy and please don't bad-mouth her to them. They will end up hating you for it. Your wife was raised a JW.......that explains most of her troubles, I feel sad for her too. She is probably drinking as a result of her upbringing and the pressure to stay with them. Poor thing. You seem to me to be a little out of control with anger and emotions right now and I guess that's only natural. Have you considered counseling yourself? It may be just what you need right now to release some of the pressure. When your kids are old enough, you can show them what you've learned and hopefully they will come to the same conclusion. I think that maybe ?? it would be a good idea to apologize to the family because of your allegation. They will hate you a little less, maybe. They are misled and telling them that they are in a satanic cult never does anything to help, unfortunately.
My heart goes out to you. I'm sorry that I don't have the answers......keep us informed?
love, dj
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64
Are Born Agains qualified to help JW's?
by sleepy in.
are born agains qualified to help jw's?.
i don't think so.sorry if you are one i have nothing against you personnally, nor jw's come to think of it, but offering your version of truth to jw's is for them to jump out of the frying pan into the fire.. the bible is the root of jw problems , and following that book in which ever way you wish will always be in error..
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DJ
Hi jnat,
We've spoken before. I hope you're doing well! I am glad that you have never been a JW. That is a real blessing. Although I think that that is the reason why you don't understand the mentality here. XJW's learn the hard way that only XJW's understand them. Many, many loving Christians who were not JW's before, have tried to help me. I love them for that! Unfortunately, noone on this earth replaces the understanding that comes from a Christian who once was a JW. Take care and I hope all is well w/ the BF. dj
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21
I'm Upset and Annoyed
by Scully inmy brother (raised a jw, never baptized, not a jw at all) and i were talking this morning, and he informed me that our grandmother - our last living grandparent - is very ill. it sounds as though she will die soon, because she stopped taking her insulin and all other medications.
my mother informed my brother after receiving a phone call from her brother/my uncle.. i'm the only one of my siblings who was not informed directly by our mother.
out of all my siblings, i'm the only one who was baptized as a jw and then left, so i'm thinking this is par for the course with being shunned, although my grandmother was never a jw herself.
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DJ
Hi Scully,
I've been in your situation a few times with various relatives. My parents failed to inform too. My siblings knew of course but they are jw's too. From where I stand, I think you should be glad that your have a brother who was considerate enough to tell you! You got some great advice here! Do what you know in your heart is right and forget about how you find out. It is just par for the course...........let it go....You will probably get some stupid excuse from your mom anyway. I did. Go see your Grandmom and tell her you love her. (((((((((((((((((((SCULLY))))))))))))))))))))) love, dj
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Can a Christian and a JW be happily married?
by janiemh inmy husband and i are currently separated (since 6/02) we have not ruled out the possibility of reconciliation and are working on some issues.
about 2 years before this separation, we both started studying with jw's.
we went to sunday meetings and had weekly in-home bible studies.
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DJ
Welcome Janie,
In my opinion from experience with my family......it seems to be that when the husband is the jw and the wife is not, it is more difficult than the reverse. Mulan is right about the subjection issues. He is the 'head of the house' and it does make a difference.
Have you tried to get your husband to do the research. You did not say whether he was baptized or not. Hopefully, he isn't yet. If he isn't, then that's great and he should be willing to Make Sure of All Things. If I were you, I would have a good long discussion about why he should research. The WT teaches that we should carefully consider what we believe. If he does that, he will leave!!!! There is so much info on the net to provide him with reliable documented facts.
As for your kids, that's tough to figure out. I agree with LB about not speaking ill against their daddy. They are old enough to see the WT hypocrisy. That is in your favor. I would engage them in the research! They will see it for what it is. You mentioned the 2 different beliefs systems.....may I ask what your beliefs are? Are you a Christian, do your kids have any prior knowledge of the gospel? I hope you don't mind me asking.
For the sake of your kids and your husband I cannot stress the dire need for the research! They are wrong as wrong can be. I am so happy that you saw that without being indocrinated first! That is a really wonderful blessing you have been given. The WT ruins lives and they are touching your life as well, but not your soul! I think that the people on this board all wish that we were as smart as you! love, dj
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Well here is quite the contrast.
by JeffT inthursday night my wife attended a class for the children's ministry at our church.
debbie directs the weekday preschool and also teaches kindergarten, as such she works very closely with the children's pastor.
he was in charge of that particular class.
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DJ
I recall an incident that my bro-in law told me. He's married to my sister (jw) He is a Christian. He sadly told me about her confusion one night during a mealtime prayer. He said she kept taking the napkin off of her head and putting it back on and taking it off again. Poor thing. She got too mixed up with all of the rules, I guess. AND they teach that their God is not a God of confusion. Poor little sis. dj
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Thank you all so much!
by Golden Girl ini couldn't have made it through these last few days without you all!
thanks for the great links and suggestions in my e mail!
hubby went to have the porta-cath put in for chemo today and his blood had something elevated that keeps it from clotting.
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DJ
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SNOOZY and HUBBY)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) You will be in my prayers. I know that you are suffering and I wanted you to know that I care. I know it that doesn't help much right now but it's all I have. The whole blood issue is extremely touchy for me because I had to face it personally when my husband was in an accident.The WT could not be more wrong. Love, dj
Hi UnDisfellowshipped:
I just wanted to say Hi and I'm glad you are here. Always thrilled to have another Christian around! I enjoy your posts. I agree, there is NO logic in the wt's blood hypocrisy! There is no love, no mercy, not even any humanity! I have to say that when I was involved with them I was not aware of the 'fraction' thing. I think if I had been aware, I probably would have left much sooner. They don't teach the fraction thing at studies....wonder why? Makes me so mad! For me, the entire issue is summed up in the teachings of Jesus when he rebuked the pharicees because they condemned the disciples for plucking the wheat on the Sabaath. Mercy comes before Sacrifice!!!!! They do not know the Father or the Son or they would see this! Sad......
I am going to the convention, "Witnesses Now for Jesus" in October. Are you going? It would be great to meet! XJW's now Christians come from all over the world........! I live in PA, about a 2 1/2 hr. drive away. It's the 18-20th. Hope you can come? You can read about it at www.pfo.org
Snoozy, It would be very healing for you to come too! I hope you can make it! You can stay with me and my husband....and kids, ok?
Love, DJ
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8
Thank you all so much!
by Golden Girl ini couldn't have made it through these last few days without you all!
thanks for the great links and suggestions in my e mail!
hubby went to have the porta-cath put in for chemo today and his blood had something elevated that keeps it from clotting.
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DJ
Hiya Snoozy,
I am glad that you are sounding a bit better! It's been a little over a year now since my dad was diagnosed with brain tumors. He, like your hubby was always healthy and strong. It is still shocking to me that he can look so good and be so sick. My dad went thru 6 chemo sessions and he did not have any blood needs. It depends on the specific chemo being administered. Some are more likely to cause the need for blood fractions....and the majority of the time it is the fractions that the org does not permit. There is a drug called Procrit now that can help the amemia associated with chemo. As far as the clotting factor in your husbands blood...boy I hope the vitamin K works..because Platelets are forbidden by the WT. You know these fractions that are allowed and fractions that aren't allowed really make me angry!
I am not sure if I know what the surgery is for? Is it to insert the porta-cath? Is this chemo systemic or directly to tumors? If it is systemic then I would absolutely question the Doctors about choosing the safest chemo for a jw. It may not be the most effective but it will be the safest for his beliefs. What a mess!
I was shunned by my entire family.....parents and 4 siblings for a few years but when my Father became ill, I didn't let anyone stop me from being with him. He was happy to see me! The rest of the family was awful to me at first. When I started to weep after talking with my dad..my sister (jw) asked me why I was crying , why was I so weak, where is my God? I took it w/ a grain of salt coming from a dub. I guess that my point is after a year now I have mastered the art of being the only non-jw in a room. It takes some tongue holding and a lot of smiling. Snoozy, just take care of your hubby because you love him and remember that they are misled and you are not.
Remember when I asked you about stereotactic radiosurgery aka Gamma Knife aka IMRT? One reason was because radiation does not cause any of the need for blood fractions issues. I would really press for answers to the radiation question. Talk with a Radiation Oncologist. There is a Doctor Jeffrey Williams from Johns Hopkins Hospital who used to answer my e-mails to him about my father's treatment. You can even send your hubby's MRI's to him for a free 2nd opinion! My dad's chemo was unsuccessful and the radiosurgery has kept him stable for a year now. I know that this is a lot of stuff for you at a time when you are feeling totally stressed but You have to ask these questions of the doctors. They are all in their own specialty and they sometimes don't communicate. Sort of like the FBI and the CIA before 9/11. I think you should ask one of your children to do the research and talk to the doc's. I did it for my dad because my mom just rank and file listened to every word by the doctors. If I did not intercept my Dad would have had 3x the radiation to his brain and would be rendered demented and would most likely be gone now a result. I learned all of this thru the internet and e-mailing and calling doctor's. His doctor was the HEAD of the Radiation Dept with a PHD and he would have given my dad 3x the radiation required if I was not informed.
Ask your daughter to learn all that she can about your hubby's illness and you will all be better for it. The whole jw thing just adds 1 more unnecessary problem when we are encountered with life and death. I have you in my thoughts plenty of days and I wish you all the best, darlin. Please e-mail me if you need anything at all! LOVE, DONNA
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Elder LIES to Downey, California Reporter
by Brymichmom indungbeetle and brymichmom delivered a stuffed lamb to the downey, ca kingdom hall at 12116 woodruff avenue today.
present were a reporter and a photographer from the downey patriot newspaper.
while we were placing the lamb at the front door, an elder approached us and asked us why we were there.
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DJ
Hi Cynthia,
High 5's! Hopefully we can meet in October @ Blue Mountain. I want to get this stuff on the news here in PA. Hmmmmmmmm.....I'm thinking....can't you smell the wood burnin'? DJ
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First and the Last of Rev 1:17 - why in caps?
by Trotafox inreferring to the excellent "kitchen" witness scene in gregbetre's thread regarding jw's denying the deity of the christ, i do have one question..... .
rev 1:8; 17-18; 22:13 states that jesus christ is the alpha and the omega, the first and the last, and the beginning and the end.
i don't think it is true that all jw's will say that rev 1:17 refers to jehovah.
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DJ
Hmmmm Cyg and Alfie,
I thought that the topic of the thread was the First and the Last? I guess that it really doesn't matter much anyway because the First = Alpha and the Last = Omega in the Greek ALPHA-bet. Now I guess I just need you to prove to me that Jesus isn't the First and the Last in the Bible and I'll squirm like a piglet and join all the Atheists. lol dj