In fact - you could refuse for your son to appear at a JC at all! Since you are the head of the household and your son is a minor - by their own teaching he is under your headship and MUST obey you.
Posts by Dawn
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52All hell has broke loose
by Yesterdays Child inwhen i got home from work last night my son was there and i was suprise to see him because it was meeting night and everyone else was gone.
then his mother comes in hmmmmmm "did your son tell you what he has done?
" nope well he has been having sex with his girlfriend the baptized pioneer elders daughter yikes my son (not baptized) and her were girlfriend and boyfriend untill her daddy stop them from seeing each other.
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85
How Screwed Up Are You Because You Were A Jehovah's Witness???
by minimus inafter reading so many experiences about how being a jw affected a person's life, i wonder how your life has turned out because you were at one time a witness.
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Dawn
Like a number of other posters here - my problems are a mixture of growing up a JW in addition to an alcoholic and abusive father. The fact that my father held an esteemed position in the kingdom hall and was seen as a "wonderful and supportive brother" didn't help - it just made me view religion and God as a total hypocrite.
I have my share of problems now - but not any more than the average Jo. In fact, most people tell me I am their "mentor" - they admire me for putting myself through college as a single parent, being successful in a career, and breaking free from a cult. Hey - come to think of it - I'm pretty damn good!
The biggest hurdle for me has been trying to open my heart up to God again and gain a relationship with him - it's hard to overcome those old feelings even though I now realize that the God of the 'dubs is NOT the the true picture of God.
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Dawn
This religion separates people from God and puts them under a heavy legalistic burden - one they can never fully carry and one that eventually breaks them. What aggravtes me the most is how the "sheep" are treated.
Jesus said he came to give life to the fullest. The JW's take life away.
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Are ALL JW families like this??
by Dawn ini am the only df'd person in my family of brothers and parents.
my father was an elder, my brothers are all elders or ms and pioneers (........yea for me........... anyways.....seems that when some crisis occurs like a death in the family everyone rushes to help - but only during the crisis.
when the crisis is over and we're just left with the day to day maintenance of things (like taking care of our elderly parents) they're no where to be found.
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Dawn
Wow Blondie - that's amazing! Thanks so much - I'm going to do some more research on this - you're right - it's eerie how much my family (and I ) match this list!
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67
A Common Mistake
by DJ inas a jw, i was taught the wrong idea of what the trinity is.
the concept of the trinity does not teach that the father is the son.
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Dawn
Hamas,
You must be muslim - am I correct? I believe that they teach that Jesus is not God's son but was a prophet of God and that the bible has been mistranslated over the last few thousand years - so much so that it can not be relied on any further.
I'm only asking out of curiosity - it seems to me that many JW's when they leave either decide (1) to be athiest, (2) go to a different non-christian religion, or (3) stagnate at the "what if they're right" phase and never move on at all. I wonder how many are able to suffer the disillusionment of the JW awakening and yet remain a Christian.
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Are ALL JW families like this??
by Dawn ini am the only df'd person in my family of brothers and parents.
my father was an elder, my brothers are all elders or ms and pioneers (........yea for me........... anyways.....seems that when some crisis occurs like a death in the family everyone rushes to help - but only during the crisis.
when the crisis is over and we're just left with the day to day maintenance of things (like taking care of our elderly parents) they're no where to be found.
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Dawn
Thanks for the response Prisca. I also wonder how much of my family's problems are a result of my father's alcoholism.
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Replacing what was stolen
by Dawn ini have been heartbroken for many years because of the way my family treated me (brothers and parents) - not only because of my df'ing but even before that.
i come across as a pretty strong person to most everyone - but my closest friends and my husband know the truth because i can't really talk about it without starting to cry.. i had a revelation this week.
my old family was stolen from me.
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Dawn
I have been heartbroken for many years because of the way my family treated me (brothers and parents) - not only because of my DF'ing but even before that. I come across as a pretty strong person to most everyone - but my closest friends and my husband know the truth because I can't really talk about it without starting to cry.
I had a revelation this week. My old family was stolen from me. But God has replaced them, he replaced them a long time ago and it took me a while to open my eyes and realize it. When I met my husband years ago his family welcomed me in with open arms - I lost a relationship with five individuals - but I gained 11 new family members - plus my husband, son, and daughter making my new family of 14 almost three times the size of my old one.
Pretty cool hu!
PS - and they won't shun me unless I do something to deserve it...like forgetting their birthday
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Are ALL JW families like this??
by Dawn ini am the only df'd person in my family of brothers and parents.
my father was an elder, my brothers are all elders or ms and pioneers (........yea for me........... anyways.....seems that when some crisis occurs like a death in the family everyone rushes to help - but only during the crisis.
when the crisis is over and we're just left with the day to day maintenance of things (like taking care of our elderly parents) they're no where to be found.
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Dawn
I am the only DF'd person in my family of brothers and parents. My father was an elder, my brothers are all elders or MS and pioneers (........yea for me..........)
Anyways.....seems that when some crisis occurs like a death in the family everyone rushes to help - but only during the crisis. When the crisis is over and we're just left with the day to day maintenance of things (like taking care of our elderly parents) they're no where to be found. My father passed away and my mom needs a lot of help keeping up with the house and other things - seems that my husband and I (the non-JW's) are the only ones in the family that take care of this. One of my elder brothers lives only 2 hours drive away and has not even come to see her in almost 2 years.
I have another brother who died recently outside of the States - he was a pioneer and MS. Everyone gathered around during the crisis - but then within a month it was forgotten and again my husband and I are left to finish dealing with the gravesite in this foreign country where he died.
My father was an alcoholic and we are not a very close knit family. So I wonder....is it because of the way my family is (being dysfunctional) or is this a JW thing?
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LETTER FROM MY DAUGHTER.... NEED YOUR OPINIONS
by calamityjane inokay guys, i need your opinion.
my 13 year old daughter was pretty close to my jw parents when we left.
i cut off ties last year because of my mom's intrusive behaviour with my daughter.
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Dawn
((((((((calamityjane))))))))))))))
Tough one! I know what you're going through - my son was very close to my parents and trying to break those ties was more painful to him than anyone. So I let my parents see him - but I told him the truth about the religion - what grandma and grandpa would say and why. I told him they would say those things not to be mean, but because they really believed it and they loved him - but that they were mislead. I showed him the proof (false prophecies, twisted doctrine, etc) - and then I made a deal with him that he occassionally come with me to my new church so he could see other religions also.
When he came home from grandma & grandpa's we had a little "decompression" time - I'd ask him how it went - and I'd ask him point blank questions about what they talked about. I tried not to put him ont he defensive by saying they were bad - but by explaining that they were really good people who were just mislead and how we hope that some day they can be free from that mind control.
It takes A LOT of talking with your kids to undo anything they may have said - and there are times when I was so angry because my parents would say some stupid thing like "you'll die at Armageddon if you don't go to meetings". But in the end - my son realized the truth about it all. My dad passed away a little over a year ago, my son still goes to see my mom almost every week. But he's 17 now and he tells mer on his own that he doesn't want to go to meetings, doesn't want to study, and will never be a 'dub. My mom loves him and accepts that because she wants a relationship with him.
The truth is - it could go either way - it's a tough call but you will have to go with your what your heart tells you to do - you know your daughter the best. Can you undo whatever your parents say by a "decompression time"? Or is she easily swayed?
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Ozzie's Weekend Poll #53
by ozziepost inwhat a glorious weekend!
hope yours is too.
weather down here is just perfect.
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Dawn
And my thought.........where are all the counselors to help the survivors who now suffer from fears and nightmares over the horrible sights they witnessed.
I didn't want to see Armageddon - I didn't want to see people die.