The mean-spiritedness that many of you have endured makes me sad.
This one seemed ridiculous to the extreme:
the elders refused to assign my grade-school age brothers
any parts unless they wore a suit.(Up to that point my little brothers had given all their talks in a tie and sweater vest.)
I'm really sorry your family had to endure such callous abuse. (What's wrong with a grade-school age brother giving a student talk in a tie and sweeter vest?) This is one of many examples that show how arrogant they can be.
Razorblade, I'm sure the elders marked me by agreeing among themselves not to socialize with me in the last congreagation I was in. This was significant becasue it was a small congregation. One time I was out harassing the neighbors with an elder and his wife. She suggested they have me over for lunch, but he'd have nothing to do with the idea. I never was invited to any parties or nothing. I felt very alone and that helped me make the decision to leave. What a blessing!