Posts by Markfromcali

The question is, do people do that to themselves? Although the way people see themselves may be different from how others see them, there is the tendency to do so in both cases.

It may be right, but only in a particular context at a particular time. I remember when I went out in service occasionally a householder would ask "but what do YOU think?" It'd give me pause for a second and then I'd rationalize things in terms of the JW beliefs in some way, a part of me would be thinking though and of course now I appreciate that. So I don't think it's wrong, it's just superficial in nature. And there is truth to the thought that people are often superficial, and they may even like it that way, but while I don't need to have much to do with them I'm not interested in affirming that kind of self image.

10

How do we gain the knowledge that leads to everlasting life?

by wannabe in

page #1. .

many today, more notebly, the religious leaders of this world, and their followers, feel that they can do a mere cursory, superficial reading of the bible, and from that, set forth their hard and fast interpretations of the holy writings.

but is it really all that easy, to understand the holy scriptures, to get 'the breadth, length, heigth, and depth,' of everything written; in order to be 'rooted and established on the foundation, to 'grasp mentally,' with all the holy ones?

Markfromcali

Wow, so good the topic had to post four times?

It's part of how to gain everlasting life.

8

How many EX JW therapists are there? Hae you been treated by one?

by hamsterbait in

i am thinking of getting some more therapy.. i spent a lot on it - ta - in the mid 90s and it made a huge differenct to me.

i have a few issues to with the dubbies i want to sort - and thought it is prolly a huge saving to see an ex jw therapist as i dont have to waste valuable time explaining the beliefs.. i am concerned there may be a downside to this - transference problems, assuming a level of understanding that is not actually there.. hb.

.

Markfromcali

I am concerned there may be a downside to this - transference problems, assuming a level of understanding that is NOT actually there.

Also keep in mind the ability to relate is not "understanding" in this sense, it's important but it's just having a feel for where you've been and where you're coming from. Most people here have that, they just may not necessarily have the psychological understanding. The JW history has more to do with the content rather than the psychological dynamics. There are other high-control groups that have similar issues, and if there are competent therapists who can deal with the issues but just don't know the JW stuff, it would be a good idea to take advantage of that. Realistically there are not going to be many with the background anyways.

Many people are not very analytically oriented, but it seems it only makes sense to understand the therapists theoretical orientation and how they frame things. Why not ask them, and at least do a quick google search and compare how these approaches work? It's really kind of amazing how people talk about being in therapy and say absolutely nothing about what kind of therapy it is, as if it's all the same. Being savvy about our health care includes our mental health.

BTW the Best Of thread is not loading right now..

4

Who or what is their Nemesis?

by sooner7nc in

nemesis (nm-ss).

n.pl.nemeses(-sz)1. a source of harm or ruin.2.

retributive justice in its execution or outcome.3.

Markfromcali

I don't think it's particularly useful to frame the situation that way. Check out The Yes Men if you haven't seen it already, it's just one example of a kind of lateral thinking approach rather than dealing with things in the usual way:

Trailer link

From Wikipedia:

The Yes Men are a culture jamming activist duo consisting of Andy Bichlbaum and Mike Bonanno. [ 1 ] Through actions of tactical media, The Yes Men primarily aim to raise awareness about what they consider problematic social issues.
To date, the duo has produced two films:The Yes Men (2003) and The Yes Men Fix the World (2009). [ 1 ] In these films, they impersonate entities that they dislike, a practice that they call "identity correction".

40

I wish I could just not give a Sh!t about being an XJW!

by cyberjesus in

jw
friends

my whole freaking family is still in.

i am 5th generation and i use to have tons and tons of "friends" that are still in.

when i was little my dad was co substitute for years so we got to travel alot and meet even more jws.

Markfromcali

It is possible, but of course everyone is different and maybe because of that one persons experience is not going to be perceived as relevant - but then again if people never try they'll never know. What I can tell you is I've tried psychology, meditation, qigong and even mind tech including frequency specific mild cranial electro-stim (The BT-6 Brain Tuner has a very nice immediate effect btw, it's a consumer device) and other things, and who knows what specifically did what in the process but I do know I didn't think about JW stuff for years before I started checking stuff out again recently. I suppose a cynic may think the reason for coming back is I have more to process, but I'm simply interested in collective social dynamics now rather than the individual level.

Whatever you do, just be sure you research it. There are different types of therapy, and of course different meds, and if you want to do something like meditation or qigong there are different forms of that too, which does not require any religious belief - someone who knows what they're doing will be able to explain it in terms of the principles involved, even if you do need to be patient and practice to get a sense yourself. (and traditional teachers are not going to be inclined to get into the whole system to start with because there are foundational stuff to do first)

Mind tech is interesting, what I've noticed is people are obsessed with the content rather than the state of mind, and since even something as simple as a binaural beat CD can alter your mental state it covers an area that you will not be able to touch directly with most other things, even with qigong and meditation it takes some times to develop the ability to shift your mental state, (but then you'd be able to do it yourself rather than rely on external tech) although there is biofeedback too. Another way of looking at it is with enough state changes there is actually a change in your consciousness structure, which is NOT going to happen directly by just reading a lot of stuff, although it can if you're contemplative enough.

Unfortunately you're going to be hard pressed to find a professional that is familiar with all that so it does involve self experimentation, you'd need to monitor yourself and interaction with meds is a concern since some of this can stimulate certain endogenous chemicals. Unfortunately I never did meds so I can't tell you the kind of stuff you might need to be aware of, but there should be enough resources out there to get some helpful info if you're interested.

And meditation is about as simple as it gets, most people are not going to think it does anything so they'd probably never take the time, but it reminds me of that Blaise Pascal quote: "All mens miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone ."

Second Life?

by Markfromcali in

is there a exjw and/or jw community on there that anybody knows of?

just curious about interacting in that environment... also if anyone is aware of links as far as general research like that one anthropologist i'd be interested, thanks..

Markfromcali

Is there a exJW and/or JW community on there that anybody knows of? Just curious about interacting in that environment..

Also if anyone is aware of links as far as general research like that one anthropologist I'd be interested, thanks.

8

THINKING is a matter of BALANCING extremes

by Terry in

our consciousness is like the economy.. if a flow and a balance between extremes is maintained we profit emotionally and materially with well-being and satisfaction.. after all, if you earn more than you spend you have a profit to invest.. if you spend more than you earn you choke in debt and spiral downward.. .

change is constant.

it is the one feature of life you can count on without fail.. .

Markfromcali

This theme also dovetails nicely with the subject of art or creativity. Even if it is not our own thought patterns, for the most part we find ourselves in an environment that stimulates us in a particular way and that inevitably reinforces certain habitual patterns. And if we do find ourselves busy balancing different thoughts on-the-fly rather than referencing a pattern we've identified from the past, it can become a bit tiring.

So the trick seems to be to not frame things in the way we are used to, and reframe things completely rather than just dealing with individual variables, but perhaps using the same overall structure to make sense of it. Or practice not framing things at all, and just be with things without any kind of perceptual filters. Even when it's there just see it for what it is, rather than immediately reacting to the presence of that structure by altering it.

31

Psychic feelings anyone?

by 1Robinella in

i'm not sure what kind of response i will get from everyone, but i have to ask.

is their someone out their that was also raised a jw but grew up with "psychic feelings?

" from the youngest age i can remember having feelings of things or just knowing.

Markfromcali

And that subjective awareness is certainly valuable and not to be discounted. The issue is when we're communicating about it, especially online we necessarily deal with the objective view.

Also it's important to distinguish between subjective and personal views. Subjectivity does not necessarily have to do with the influence of personal factors, but if it is viewed personally then there's a lot of baggage that comes with it, and that's just going to obscure our view. That's why I have no interest in relating this kind of experience anymore, it seems to inevitably become another sensationalistic story.

I don't see why we can't view things both subjectively and objectively, including this kind of experience. Both may have biases but being aware of them is a part of seeing things clearly. We are obviously capable of both perspectives, but we don't seem to make it a habit of having an awareness of both all the time, and perhaps categorize some things as belonging to one view or the other.