Posts by confuzzlediam

53

questions

by DanielC in

i've been dating a jw girl for about 4 years and we've recently had a lot of issues with the fact that her family doesn't like that i'm not a jw.

i've been looking into the religion and am interested in it.

but is it wrong to join just so i don't lose her?

i've been dating a JW girl for about 4 years and we've recently had a lot of issues with the fact that her family doesn't like that i'm not a JW. I've been looking into the religion and am interested in it. But is it wrong to join just so I don't lose her?

I am finding it hard to write down my thoughts on this. Part of me wants to tell you to run! The other part of me wants to tell you to look into it and make an informed decision based on what is right for YOU, not what is right for you and your girlfriend. If you are doing it based ONLY on not wanting to lose her, then you need to think long and hard about that. Essentially you would be putting on a false facade, which would not be fair to her.

If you are doing it because you genuinely are interested in what the religion teaches, then you also need to think long and hard on that as well!! lol Becoming one of Jehovah's Witnesses is a lifelong commitment. It is a lifestyle that revolves around a religion telling you exactly how to behave. Once you are baptized, your every move will be under scrutiny by the entire congregation, your girlfriend and her family. You are not allowed to question beliefs once you are "in". One false move and you will lose everything. I know that from personal experience.

I try not to judge others by the way they believe. If you think that this is the religion for you, then who am I to tell you what to do. Again, this is a decision that only YOU can make. Just make sure that you don't rush into it. Research and question EVERYTHING that you are told. Don't believe it just because they said so.

My kids are 17 and 21 and were raised as Jehovah's Witnesses. After I was disfellowshipped, 5 years ago, we pretty much stopped going as a family. I left and divorced their dad a year ago, but he does not go either. My daughter (21) recently broke up with her boyfriend/fiancee of 5 1/2 years (who was NOT a witness) and she has her cousins trying to set her up with JW's that they know. I teased my daughter and told her she was forbidden from dating a witness! LOL She is good with it!!

I wish you the best with your decision. Again, ultimately you have to do what is right for YOU, and only YOU know what that is. The worst thing you can do is not be true to yourself just so you won't lose someone else. I did that for 25 years in my marriage. Tried to be what my husband wanted me to be. Now I am dating someone who loves me for me...no false facade now!! It is a GREAT feeling!!

25

Witnesses Preach to Dog

by snugglebunny in

jw
friends

"in el salvador, one man tied his vicious dog in front of the door whenever he saw jehovahs witnesses nearby.

the man would wait for the witnesses to move on, and then he would bring the dog back into the house.

the brothers were never able to speak to the man.

confuzzlediam

WingCommander LOVE the Smurf comment!! I was not allowed to watch the show after all that stuff came out about how Papa smurf was a sorcerer and what not! lol The tales that were spun were scary to me at the time because of how they were presented to me...now I look back and laugh at how out of control it all got! After reading the first part of Crisis of Conscience, I now see that all the "experiences" that are told are just made up to fit their agenda.

14

JW Personality used as an excuse....

by Anon_SA1 in

jw
friends

i had a discussion with a current jw member of +- 30 years, we got chatting about how you can be sure your faith is right and what checks can be done.

i then suggested looking at ex members view points and literature.

her response was her "i am not someone who takes initiative to look online at stuff, i doesn't feel my personality needs me look at outside view points" in summary she was saying her personality type is not interested in looking at other views.

confuzzlediam

I agree to a certain degree that it can be based on personality. Some personalities are just ok with going along with the crowd. If they are told it is the truth, they will not question, they really don't care either way. If they are happy with what they know to be the truth, then why research it?

On the other hand, there are those whose personalities question everything in existence and don't just do as they are told. They have an innate sense of what they feel is not right and will research the crap out of it to find out whether or not what they are being told is the truth or not. From politics to religion to buying a new car!

Agreed as well though that it is a mindset on what has been spoken over and over again, not to question something they are told to be the truth, only to believe that it is the truth. As a born in, this was driven into my mind for 39 years of the 44 that I have been alive. It is only when you break free from this mindset, that your instincts really start kicking in. Breaking free for me came from being wrongfully disfellowshipped. I started to question the unloving way the elders treated my situation, then began questioning if they could treat someone like that, then was God really with them. That lead me down the path to learning for myself whether or not I believed in a God...still questioning, still researching, still learning.

I heard the same things from my x-husband when I would tell him certain things that I had read or saw here on this site. For example, one time I told him I had a copy of the elder's book. He told me that just because it was posted, didn't mean that someone didn't go in and change it to fit their "agenda" against the watchtower. Again, that comes from many years of being told that apostates have an agenda and are willing to go to any lengths to get you to turn away from the organization, lying to you about "truths" just to get you to turn away from Jah.

46

WT addresses the "rapture" teaching.

by wifibandit in

look at paragraph 15 of the 2015 july 15th study edition pg 18-19.. http://imgur.com/3wparys.

.

basically they admit to teaching the rapture (for the anointed remnant), just don't call it that!.

confuzzlediam

OH yeah!! I was at the meeting 2 years ago when they went over it from the WT study mag. At the time, I was going back to meetings just to get reinstated. My husband (now x) was not there with me, so called him IMMEDIATELY after meeting to tell him what I had just heard. I read to him from the study article and told him this is the rapture!! I left that meeting with such a headache...that was when it became crystal clear that I no longer wanted any part of the religion.

To say that they do not believe in a "rapture" but sit there and say that whom ever is left on earth out of the 144,000 at armageddon would be taken into the heavens is so deceiving to me! Either call it what it is, or don't teach it at all.

This was mentioned in the memorial talk last week. I just rolled my eyes as I was listening to it. However, it once again confirmed why I won't ever go back.

51

NEW 2012 Elders book with 2015 Amendments

by Newly Enlightened in

thanks to jw archive wiki we have a pdf of the new elders book.. https://www.dropbox.com/s/mz9z38909t3fh7c/2012-shepherd-the-flock-of-god-ks10_e.pdf?dl=0.

confuzzlediam

Oubliette Whew thanks!! Glad to have that cleared up! I need to go now...will be back in 5! lol

Oh yes...I am SO VERY glad that homosexuality is now cleared up for me as well. I wasn't quite sure how that all worked...

51

NEW 2012 Elders book with 2015 Amendments

by Newly Enlightened in

thanks to jw archive wiki we have a pdf of the new elders book.. https://www.dropbox.com/s/mz9z38909t3fh7c/2012-shepherd-the-flock-of-god-ks10_e.pdf?dl=0.

confuzzlediam

Reading through the book, I found this: An entrenched practice of viewing, perhaps over a considerable period of time, abhorrent forms of pornography that is sexually degrading. Such pornography may include homosexuality (sex between those of the same gender), group sex, bestiality, sadistic torture, bondage, gang rape, the brutalizing of women, or child pornography. Brazen conduct would be involved if the offender was promoting such material, such as by inviting others to view it, thus giving evidence of a brazen attitude.—w12 3/15 pp. 30-31; w06 7/15 p. 31.

SO does this mean that one can watch porn with only a man and a woman and that is ok? Just wondering...

51

NEW 2012 Elders book with 2015 Amendments

by Newly Enlightened in

thanks to jw archive wiki we have a pdf of the new elders book.. https://www.dropbox.com/s/mz9z38909t3fh7c/2012-shepherd-the-flock-of-god-ks10_e.pdf?dl=0.

confuzzlediam

Splash "6. If members of the congregation are known to have undue association with disfellowshipped or disassociated relatives who are not in the household, elders should counsel and reason with those members of the congregation from the Scriptures.

If it is clear that a Christian is violating the spirit of the disfellowshipping decree in this regard and does not respond to counsel, it may be that he would not qualify for congregation privileges, which require one to be exemplary. He would not be dealt with judicially unless there is persistent spiritual association or he openly criticizes the disfellowshipping decision."

This is very interesting to me as both of my parents were and have been VERY vocal about my wrongful disfellowshipping. They even wrote several letters to the body of elders and to the watchtower branch. Which of course were not well received. My mom stopped talking to her BFF of over 40 years for a while because she was agreeing with the WT society in regards to my disfellowshipping. Apparently they should have been in a judicial meeting over it. WOW!

76

Active posters: What education have you had, what degrees do you possess?

by EndofMysteries in

jw
friends

from so many posts and conversations on here, you'd think over 1/2 the posters here possess doctorates in theology, physics, biology, etc.

i'm curious aside from the books and research people have done here, what degrees they have.

to start, i just got an aa and going straight through full time to an mba.

confuzzlediam

Oubliette Thank you!! It has been an enlightening year for sure!!

76

Active posters: What education have you had, what degrees do you possess?

by EndofMysteries in

jw
friends

from so many posts and conversations on here, you'd think over 1/2 the posters here possess doctorates in theology, physics, biology, etc.

i'm curious aside from the books and research people have done here, what degrees they have.

to start, i just got an aa and going straight through full time to an mba.

confuzzlediam

Just went back to school after being disfellowshipped 5 years ago and filing for divorce from a 25 year marriage last June. Went back to school at the ripe old age of 43. First to get my GED last summer, now attending a community college to get my associate's degree then on to the university for a bachelor's degree...perhaps a master's and while I am at it...maybe PhD!! lol I LOVE being in school and am soaking it all in as I go!

14

Questions about Non JWs attending a JW baptism

by TTWSYF in

i attended my brother and sister in laws' baptism at a kingdom hall a number of years ago.

i was [am] not a jw so when i arrived i was bombarded with attention from the flock to which i politely stated that i was there to see my brother and his wife.

it seemed like the distraction was intentional.

confuzzlediam

Not from my experience. I was a born-in. Baptism is a time of excitement for all who are involved. It is hard to take pics because everyone is standing around trying to see the event. I would imagine they were even more excited to see you there witnessing his baptism and was done without malicious intent. Just my thoughts...