Posts by Corvin
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13Welcome "Puppy" To The Forum!
by Corvin ini had to go to radio shack today to buy some wire for a project.
i was helping a friend with his electronic devices and was running late to meet him.
as i stood near the check out line, a woman softly spoke my name.
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19
mother called!!
by boy@crossroads inmy mother knows i haven't been going to the meetings lately.
we haven't officially had a 'heart to heart' yet.
well she calls up today (sunday after about lunchtime) and immediately begins asking 'where were you yesterday, i tried to call you 5 times?
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Corvin
I am sort of glad that my mother is not here to carry the burden of worrying about all five of her sons and their standing in the organization. I think, however, that I could have reached her with the truth about "the truth" and helped her to recover. At least, I tell myself that.
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13
Welcome "Puppy" To The Forum!
by Corvin ini had to go to radio shack today to buy some wire for a project.
i was helping a friend with his electronic devices and was running late to meet him.
as i stood near the check out line, a woman softly spoke my name.
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Corvin
I had to go to Radio Shack today to buy some wire for a project. I was helping a friend with his electronic devices and was running late to meet him. As I stood near the check out line, a woman softly spoke my name. I turned to her, not recognizing her I asked, "who are you?"
Her reply sounded like, "you're a pedophile".
I said, "what?"
She said her name again, then everything clicked. She was not only NOT calling me a pedophile, but she was a long lost sweetheart from when were young teens growing up in the org.
We use to stay up all night talking on the phone. She was so sweet and smart and was the only one of her family in the organization at the time. Her mother and sister later came in.
We stood in the parking lot of Radio Shack for two hours talking and catching up. She told me her story, which I will leave it to her to share with all of you. She will be along shortly to check out the board. I don't know if she will post right away, however, I think a warm welcome would be good for her after all she has been through.
WELCOME PUPPY! I MISSED YOU LIKE A FAT BOY MISSES CAKE!
Corvin
Edited to say: "Puppy" was the nickname I gave her when we were kids.
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19
mother called!!
by boy@crossroads inmy mother knows i haven't been going to the meetings lately.
we haven't officially had a 'heart to heart' yet.
well she calls up today (sunday after about lunchtime) and immediately begins asking 'where were you yesterday, i tried to call you 5 times?
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Corvin
Shes just infected with this disease called Jehovahs witnesses.
tell me about it. My exwife thinks that more meetings and more service is the answer to everything.
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79
Many people do not show affection- why is this?
by gumby inwe all know people who will not show affection to those they love or care deeply about.
why cannot a father who loves his daughter deeply...........ever hug her and tell her how much he loves her?.
why cannot some spouses tell their mate they love them?.
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Corvin
Cuz we're Norweigan! haha!
That can't be true since I had a Norweigan neighbor, Robert, who became good friends with my wife and I, and he was always trying to show me affection.
I think it could be that fear of rejection is great among us. I think that pride comes into play and we never ever want to be seen as weak. I was just sent a wonderful pm from a member who feared expressing what they felt openly in public, and they gushed warmly to me and it felt good. I did not even check to see if they were a guy or a girl, because the words and gesture were so genuine and sweet that it did not matter. I accepted it without question, because it just felt good, and thanks to that member.
I don't know what it would be like if I could not hold my wife at least 10 times a day and tell her emphatically how much I love her. I can't stand the thought that one of my daughters are in the same room or the next room and they haven't been assured of my love. (We have a 10 hug a day policy in this house) I know that when we are watching a movie or something and my son comes over and sits next to me and leans on my shoulder, that he loves me, that is what he is comfortable with, although he hugs and says "I love you" less than anybody in the house.
Hugs and I love yous, when genuine, break down barriers.
Corvin
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Corvin
Corvin... I think there are genetics there, for sure. But also, our environment is a heck of a lot more than just who are parents are and where we grow up. Our environment is every single thing that touches us: our teachers, our friends, what we read, what we see. No two people have the exact same environment, unless they are literally joined at the hip.
Excellent point! I use to know that . . . I just forgot is all
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16
I Talked My Daughter's Boyfriend's . . .
by Corvin in.jw mother last night.
to recap, i have been posting about how my 17 yo daughter is dating an 18 yo unbaptized jw, carl.
they are madly in love (or whatever) and i support and approve of their dating since he has proven to be a good respectful kid with brains and the ability to think for himself.
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Corvin
. . .JW mother last night.
To recap, I have been posting about how my 17 yo daughter is dating an 18 yo unbaptized JW, Carl. They are madly in love (or whatever) and I support and approve of their dating since he has proven to be a good respectful kid with brains and the ability to think for himself. I disclosed to him that I was apostate when he came to pick her up for their first date some weeks ago, and I told him if he felt like running he should do so. He seems to be fine with the situation and is intent on seeing my daughter against the admonition of the Society to shun disfellowshipped and apostate persons. Hmmm . . .
Well, his mother called me last night. It is my understanding that Carl told his mom that I am apostate. (I also told my EXwife a couple weeks ago, therefore, I am sure there isn't anyone who does not know by now) She was confident, kind, warm and genuine when speaking to me on the telephone . . . sort of like her boy, Carl. She expressed a concerne that the two kids needed chaparoning. I offerred that the two of them were raised with the same principles and know right from wrong; if they were going to have sex, they would do it and behind our backs. Whatever they decided to do, they must take responsibility for. I let her know that I am not offerring them a license to fool around, but to be safe, I have made an appointment with the doc to put my daughter on birth control. She didn't even flinch.
Getting more to the point, she said that she was also concerned that Carl is 18 while my kid is still 17 until November, and yes, she used the term "jail bait", but in a way that was in no way disrespectful. I was impressed. She further related to me how she ran into my exwife at Walmart the other day, and how my exwife made a very pleasant valed threat with regard to Carl making a move on our daughter. The gist was jail for the boy if he did anything. What a good JW my exwife is. I assured her that if the two of them cross the line, I would not even think of busting Carl's ass. They are too close to the same age for me to even consider it. She was pleased breathed easier. I told her that no matter what, my daughter's mother could never know what is really going on with the kids dating or how serious it might become, or she will use it against me, her, and the kids. I said, "believe it".
Next, we talked about how fond we were of eachother's kids, and how welcome they were in each one's respective homes. She mentioned how it was her desire to see Carl baptized and to see my daughter follow suit. She talked about how hard it is to be a JW and have an unbelieving mate like herself. Then she said how it would be so nice if I would "come back and love Jehovah". I put the breaks on right then and there, and spoke kindly but firmly.
I said, "I was raised in the organization and have seen some pretty discouraging stuff. We have always been warned about the persecution that comes from the nations, other religions, worldly people, etc., but what really alarms me, what I really must take exception to, is how every bit of persecution me and my kids have experienced has come, not from the world, but right directly from those in the organization. All their pain and suffering has been a direct result of growing up in the organization. Their mother and stepfather along with some of the elders nearly caused the death of your son's girlfriend, my daughter, through abuse, hypocrisy, anger, lack of self-control, apathy and ignorance. They were working on destroying the younger two when I intervened with the help of the worldly authorities . . . " I told her how the PO and the elders in their mother's congregation ignored the abuse and failed to report it, while disregarding my position as their father because I was df'd. How the PO told one of my kids that coming to live with me, because I was df'd, would put her in spiritual danger. I told her how my youngest daughter, only 12 yo, is suffering and being treated for severe depression and Post Tramatic Stress Disorder. Finally I said, "with all do respect to you and your son, I will never, ever, come back to the org and I am strongly encouraging my kids not to get baptized into it as well. I will not allow them get baptize as long as they are minors and I will really become unpleasant, say if someone like you or Carl, began pressuring my daughter to serve in the organization when she is only 17 and shouldn't be dealing with such matters until she figures out what she wants and who she is. Then it has to be for her to decide without pressure, guilt or shame, and without the condition of their love and relationshio being dependent on being a JW. That would be coercion, and we cando without it. I was told way back when, that, I would never see adulthood in this system of things, that I would never have children in this world. Well here I am, 37 just like you, I have my kids and I am responsible for them and to them when it comes to protecting them. Right now, as I see it, the organization and their mother is biggest threat to them today. They will never say to me, ' Dad, where were you when things were so terrible?'"
She spoke of some of her challenges in times past with some in the org, but a change of congregations did the trick for her. Edited to add: She hates that so many JW parents think that it is only the other kids in the congregation that do bad things and get into trouble. She hates that some parents, especially elder parents are so hard on their kids over any little infraction. I agreed and knew what kid in particular she was talking about. Casey. He is 17 and has a crush on my middle daughter. They talk on the phone alot and sometimes hang out, but she does not like him the same. I feel so sorry for that kid and know that when he turns 18 he will be long gone for sure.
I said, "The rules of the org are the same in every congregation. I cannot come back because it would bother my conscience to be carrying on a lie. Most of all, I could not be the advocate for my children that I have become if I had to play by their rules. They (the kids) are alive and getting better, in my estimation, because I have stood up on there behalf, which means taking a stand against the WTBTS. Besides, I could not walk into the Kingdom Hall or go out in service after having called my exwife "a nuerotic bitch" or after telling the PO he is "an ignorant prick". Atleast one of my kids would be dead if I had to play by the organization's rules and go along with everything they say without question. That is insanity."
She was just a bit shaken after hearing my position. She was not that shaken, however. We hung up the phone expressing our desire to ensure the best interests of our kids. She was so cool and delightful, after all. This is weird because she does not shutter at my apostasy or my words spoken against the organization, almost as if she knows exactly what I am talking about. She does not forbid her son to come over here either, but even gives her OK for him to spend the night since he has become a part of the family, provided the sleeping arrangements are appropriate. She says that my daughter is welcome to spend the night at her home as well, with all propriety and such (which she actually did last night).
What the hell is happening here? LOL. This is not the reaction of your average JW, that's for sure.
Corvin
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34
There's a good chance I will never have children
by logansrun inyou know, i have the lingering suspicion i will never have children.
that's right, no little bradley's or bradettes to worry about.
here's my logic: i left the dub's two years ago (almost) and am still a couple years away from a degree.
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Corvin
Parenting is not for everyone. Good that you can recognize that
It is funny; I never thought about whether or not I was meant to have kids. I never wondered if I would be a good dad. I never thought about failure when the kids did come. I just looked at them and loved them at first glance. I dunno why it is I am not worried for their future.
If you have doubts, Logan, you may be one of those who parenting is not meant for. Enjoy somebody else's chilluns. Be a good uncle or godfather to someone's kids. There are rewards for making a difference in a kids life no matter if they belong to you or not. Cheers!
Corvin
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Scary pictures
by Surfacing ini remember as a kid being freaked out by two pictures.
one was of the demons floating away leaving their screaming wives and babies during the flood, and the other was the collage with the gas mask guy and the kid holding his hands over his ears and the dead guy with the chopsticks.... .
oh yes, did i mention that i wasn't allowed to watch the care bears movie as a kid because of the "frightening and demonic" scenes?
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Corvin
if you have a Revelation book (1988) turn to the picture of the crowd of "evil" people surrounding the JWs at the end of the millennium, you know, the ones that return to Satan.
It is interesting to note in that illustration, those on Satan's side are either wearing headbands or hanging with those wearing headbands. We must let the JW's know that Satan's secret weapon for turning people against Jehovah and his faithful will be headbands. Speaking of the "faithful", notice that there are only like . . . 11 righteous people hanging out petting animals, looking at the pretty stream, picnicking . . . waiting to get clubbed. Why so little? Damn, that is not encouraging for any of us is it?
Corvin
Edited to say, might as well jump.
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69
How many were raised as a JW during their teenage years?
by codeblue in.
and how many of you feel because of that, you never really got to be a "teenager"?
codeblue
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Corvin
This is a pic from 1968 of me and my four brothers. I am the baby.
Back right: James. Baptized at age 12, df'd and shunned by all friends and family, completely cut off and made a pariah at age 13. He never recovered from the shame and became an alcoholic.
Back left: Ronnie. Baptized at age 11, df'd and shunned by all friends and family, completely cut off and made a pariah at age 12. He never recovered from the shame and anger and became addicted to pot at age 13. He is now nearly 50 and cannot go a single day without a joint. He still vents his anger and rage on all of us brothers.
Center: Donald. Never baptized. Became addicted to food and still has tremendous social inadequacies.
Front left: Jeffrey. Was baptized at age 16. Moved out of the house and became a pioneer at 16. Was always gay and when all of his prayers for Jehovah to make him straight failed, he began smoking and drifted. Was MIA for nearly ten years after the death of our mother and has recently resurfaced with a meth addiction. Currently in treatment.
Front right: Me, Corvin. Baptized at age 17 after answering three of the baptism questions correctly. Was df'd at age 18. While out, Satan sent me his daughter to marry. Was reinstated at 19 bringing my new bride along with me. Was df'd again at 23 for smoking. I then began doing teen things . . . and I am not done yet.