Are you a "here I am" or a "there you are"?

by Mulan 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • poppers


    What I am getting at is that the "you" who you THINK you are sets you apart from everything else - this "idea of you" is what I refer to as ego. There may be "shyness" arising but that shyness is no part of what you ACTUALLY are. If there is some claim being made, some "ownership" of shyness , no matter what the cause, then that ownership indicates that there is some identification going on. Flowing from the ownership of shyness social interaction becomes affected. If the shyness can be allowed to arise and not become viewed as "mine" there will be less liklihood of it exerting the control that it seems to now.

    The question which was posed in the thread is based upon an unexamined assumption: that there is "someone" who either views things primarily from a "here I am" viewpoint, or from a "there you are" viewpoint. Either way, the basic assumption of "I" and "you" has not been investigated. In my own life I was very shy and socially withdrawn. When I stumbled upon the idea of searching out the existence of the "me" that I THOUGHT I was I couldn't find it. With the collapse of the "me identification" the tendency I had to be shy faded away.

  • Simon

    I remember an interview with Brian Clough, a football manager who was a little, erm ... 'eccentric'. He was the best England manager we never had.

    Anyway, he had a curious way of putting things and would say:

    "You know Elvis? He's met me, you know !", not "I've met him".

    I am the opposite - a natural introvert and would much prefer not to enter the room at all.

  • onacruse


    I am the opposite - a natural introvert and would much prefer not to enter the room at all.

    Which begs, imho, the question:

    Do we have a choice in this matter?

    After all, with all the positives and negatives, the thrills and disappointments, of our coexistence with other human beings (be they JW or not), do we really have a choice in whether we'd rather just be by ourselves, happy to be alone, totally alone? I don't think so; we're stuck with what we have, and tough shyte.

    Trust me, mate, I can relate to what you just posted in more ways than you might imagine...

    But, in any case, whether we have a choice or not, for myself, it's definitely "there you are."

  • Gretchen956

    Hmmmmm poppers, sounds suspisciously like Scientology. You a member?

    For me it really depends on the situation. I'm never a "there you are" unless I'm specifically looking for a person for a reason. I'm also not a "here I am" because I don't like to be the center of attention. But I do tend to make my way around to everyone in my own fashion, so I'm not sure how I would be catagorized.


  • ozziepost

    What I really hate is the expression "here you go" when i'm being handed something. Do you have that where you are or is it just a downunder thing?

    Whenever I hear it, I respond "But I'm not going anywhere!"

  • Sirona

    ****looks around****

    "Here I am!"

  • skinnyboy

    I would say I am a "i'm here, now wheres the bar?" kind of dude.

    I feel comfortable with myself finally, and when i enter a room, i usually scan teh room for people i gravitate towards and go there, via the bar of course!

  • Mulan
    I am the opposite - a natural introvert and would much prefer not to enter the room at all.

    Simon, anyone who has met you, knows that. Introverts are people too. I'm married to one.

    Sherry, you are a "there you are". I found you to be very sociable and fun.

    For everyone else: This isn't a judgment situation, so please don't get offended by the question. Being one or the other, doesn't make you better or worse than others. It's just a type.

    Some people walk into a gathering, and feel like "well, I made I am". While others, feel "great, a party, oh, there you are" and go in search of people to interract with.

    I keep thinking that many of you don't understand the question. No biggie. I just thought it would be fun.

  • bikerchic

    gee I just don't fit in.....I'm a "I hope you're there" type of person, which may be a "there you are" type. Seems that I'm looking forward to seeing a certain person and if they aren't there I usually leave. I'm not keen on gatherings they over stimulate me and tire me out for days afterward.

  • poppers

    From Gretchen956:

    "Hmmmmm poppers, sounds suspisciously like Scientology. You a member?"

    Nope. I am not a member of anything. What I express is a result of my direct experience, not some idea borrowed from some ideology, philosophy, or religion. After being challenged to find "me" and actually looking for it, "I" was nowhere to be found. Not finding a "me" I realized there cannot be a "you" either. Look for yourself and see if this is true or not. See if you can actually find the specific entity "me' apart from ideas held about "me" - let me know if you can find anything other than ideas. If "you" are not an idea, then what are "you"? Hint: what do all ideas, emotions, sensations, objects, and events unfold within? Discover/remember/reconnect consciously with THAT. When you find it you will know directly what I am talking about for "yourself."

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