friend of mine with dilemma

by burnthepig 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    She could ask her what it is. Tell her that she will not consider the lunch or home visit until she has an idea of what it is about. If she won't give a breif rundown, then no chancee, chawlie.

    As well, if the person will not divulge ahead of time what it is about, she could level the charge against her that it sounds unethical, like possibly being a scam, or some other unsavory thing. That turns the tables on the other person.

    S

  • Legolas
    Legolas

    If I was her I would ask what is is about and that if it was about religion, that I wasn't interested that I have my own views and would like to be respected for them as I respect that she has her own views!!

  • NeonMadman
    NeonMadman

    Have her get some Amway literature and, when they meet for lunch, she can try to recruit the JW.

  • Buhdee
    Buhdee

    It may not be religion related at all...it could be work related, the reason not to discuss it on the work site. I mean, I don't discuss work problems at work, we talk about that kind of issues off site. It could be anything or she could ask for advise on another topic.

    Like I mentioned in an earlier post, I'd be upfront with her about religion. I have people at work the same way who are very relgious. I tell them up fron I don't discuss religion..(had years of that) I change the subject. If they bring it up again, I state it again. I don't lose the control.

    She is probably a very nice person. I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and make sure she knows the peramiters up front. If they go out to lunch, I'd also take two cars...in the event I (gasp) could be wrong. Then she is not dependent on her and can leave when she pleases. If she offeres literature she should turn them down, not accept them. If she suggests just take them, she should hold her ground and say no thank you, reiterating she is not interested in her relgion.

    Independent and in control

  • karen96
    karen96

    Knowing that Dubs don't socialize with people outside the cong, this is a big red flag! She wants to witness. If she doesn't want to jeopardize her work relationship with this person, then politely tell her she has no interest in discussing religious matters with co-workers so there is no friciton on the job.

    karen

  • jaffacake
    jaffacake

    I would LOVE to receive such an invitation because of what I know.

    But if your friend is not fully briefed on the truth about JWs, this could do her great harm.

  • burnieschick
    burnieschick
    Have her get some Amway literature.....

    Are they still around? Blimey! I knew a biker once who had a JW knock at his door. He got out his bikers magazine and bored them to tears with it. They were trying to back out of the house to escape! lol

  • ebby
    ebby

    Hi everyone...it's me, the friend with the dilemma. I appreciate all of your advice and comments.

    Not only is this coworker of mine a JW, but one of my supervisors is as well! They are everywhere I turn, lol...(In his defense, however, he has never said a word to me about his faith, other than short answers such as "I don't vote for religious reasons".)

    I think that the suggestion of asking whether this meeting is intended to discuss religion is a good one. I am a Lutheran, and my ex-husband (with whom I maintain a good friendship) is in the Lutheran seminary, so I am quite familiar with Lutheran theology and am very comfortable in my own faith, although I don't really attend church regularly. If she makes any attempts to witness to me, I could turn the tables on her and begin telling her how wonderful the Lutheran faith is. I am told that most JW's close up shop quickly when someone starts trying to sell religion on them...they apparently can dish it out but can't take it.

    Someone else recommended that I just explain that I respect her religious views and ask that she show me the same respect in turn. Any ideas on whether that might work?

    Again, I appreciate all of your responses!

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz

    Hi, Ebby. Welcome to the forum!

    With this being a supervisor it is especially important to set a clear, respectful boundary with her. Buhdee had a great response, but since this is a supervisor, maybe just tweek it a bit into the form of a question.

    Maybe, "I'd love to have lunch with you. I'm wondering though if this has anything to do with discussing religion or the Bible? You should know that I make a point of never, under any circumstances, discussing religious beliefs with people that I work with."

    If that is what this is about, she may drop it. If she doesn't, and if she really likes you she may push it in an effort to 'save' you, you can simply say, "I understand that you are trying to help me. However, it is just inappropriate to our working relationship that we discuss religion." Then let it drop.

    If her attitude toward you cools, and it may, she should come back around eventually.

    At any rate, that's my two cents...

    J

  • Satanus
    Satanus
    I could turn the tables on her and begin telling her how wonderful the Lutheran faith is. I am told that most JW's close up shop quickly when someone starts trying to sell religion on them...they apparently can dish it out but can't take it.

    Not necesarily, unless you really know your religion, your bible, history and the watchtower beliefs. A knowledgeable jw can give as well as take.

    S

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit