confusion

by inarock&ahardplace 12 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • inarock&ahardplace
    inarock&ahardplace

    I am going through a difficult time with my feelings on things. I have a really good friend that helps me with research she has done in regards to "is this the true religion", but has anyone else out there been so torn that even with evidence one way or another in front of you, you still feel empty when you think of not having the 'truth' in your life? I have 3 children and was raised in the 'truth' so was my husband. I miss some aspects of it, esp for my children, but can't do it whole souled, so I don't do it at all and there is so much that I just don't agree with. What are your experiences?

  • misanthropic
    misanthropic

    I felt the same way for a long, long time. I was also raised in the truth and I think that makes a difference as well, since you have nothing else to compare to. I think spending time here on this board will help you alot, just to see there are alot of people who have been through the same thing. When you realize you are not alone, it makes things easier. You need to see what you personally believe instead of being around people who are telling you what you have to believe. It gets easier over time, once you get a chance to let yourself feel whatever is right for you.

  • kls
    kls

    Welcome to the forum, here you will hear many stories with the emotional termoil the wt has caused so many, and you will learn that the wt is not what it pretends to be.

  • undercover
    undercover

    Welcome....

    I have been exactly where you are at...

    Because of being programmed for so long to rely on the "truth", the prospect that it isn't true is a shock to the system. You will struggle back and forth until you can prove to yourself that it's not the "truth".

    What you have to try to do is take it one step at a time. Tons of feelings and questions are bombarding your brain right now..First thing is you have to determine for yourself, "Is this the truth or not?" Don't dwell on the ramifications of the answer so much as make sure you know the correct answer first. Once you have decided what is truth or not(and only you can decide, don't take our word, don't take an elders word..decide for yourself from the evidence) then you go to the next step.

    The next question most JWs have once they realize that things aren't right is, "what is right? where will I go?" Scary prospect at first, but that answer can only be answered again by yourself as you decide what is right for you and your family.

    It goes on from there with multitudes of other questions and worries. The answers don't come overnight. It takes time to recover from the conditioning. It takes time to formulate opinions and make decisions.

    It's kind of like three steps forward, two steps back for a while. But even then it is progress.

    Stick around and read the experiences and the things learned.

    Good luck on your new journey to freedom.

  • wanderlustguy
    wanderlustguy

    It's a hard thing to learn that everything you believed is wrong. What you are feeling isn't new, many of us have gone through the same emotions. Your identity isn't one and the same as the organization.

    The void you feel is absence of truth...real truth. Since you know what you beleived was a lie, there is a void to be filled, something goes away, there has to be something else to fill the vacuum. Keep digging, learn more, the truth is out there and much easier to get than it once was. One of the big truths, however, is you are complete, you have everything you need to make your own choices and decisions...you don't need a guide as much as you think.

    Good luck and welcome.

    WLG

  • EvilForce
    EvilForce

    Welcome....please spend some time here digging thru all the posts. What you will find will probably astound you. (At least it did for me.)
    Remember it takes bravery to trade a "certainty" even though it's a fantasy and trade it for soul searching, questioning, and the unknown but I promise you the journey will be worth it at the end of the day.
    Sometimes, life doesn't have simple answers. You must find "your way". Challenge your assertions. Rethink your reflexes. Develop your spirituality outside of JW programming.
    Most of all WELCOME!

  • FairMind
    FairMind

    Yes, it is a difficult situation to be in when you realize your religion is not what you’ve been taught it is. Personally I have come to terms with this “truth” through the realization that none of religions teach all of the truth as relates to the Bible. Every religion I look at has good points and bad points. When I look at the WTBTS I see an organization that doctrinally is closest to what I believe the Bible teaches, so I choose to stay there rather than leave. In my opinion worshipping God with what one believes to be the truth and with the proper spirit is what counts, not the organization to which you belong.

  • Joyzabel
    Joyzabel

    welcome to the board.

    yes, I was litterally dizzy for days after reading Crisis of Conscience when the house of cards came tumbling down. It like takes the breath away from you, wind out of your sails, etc, etc, etc. But it is better to work through the mental process of "deprogramming" than to live lies.

    Be patient with yourself and family. Remember the basic, love yourself and love your family. There is nothing to hurry for anymore, so take the time to allow yourself to grieve over your loss (it's real to you, even thought it was built on a fairtale) and allow at least 2 years to figure out who you are and what to do with the rest of your life.

    I call it a right of passage. Anyone who has been in a "high congrol" group needs time to get over the blow to your psychie.

    Hugs,

    Joy

  • Faith
    Faith

    Hi welcome to the board!

    I too have three children who have three children now. They are grown. Trust yourself and relax. I do wish I knew then what I know now. Just relax and enjoy your life, enjoy your children. Continue to research and learn. I spent about three years just studying in between taking care of the kids. I am very happy where I am now, content, joyful, at peace. The journey was tough at times but you will get there.

    Love,

    Faith

  • Hellrider
    Hellrider
    I miss some aspects of it, esp for my children,

    ?? I was raised in the JWs too, and believe me, you don`t have to miss any part of it on behalf of your children! Growing up without the JW-insanity is the best gift you can give them! That way, they might grow up to be normal persons, socially well-adapted, not neurotic wrecks (like I am) dealing with a childhood of fear of Jehovah, Armageddon and demons, way up into their adult "lives". You are doing the right thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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