Like I say, I went about getting out all wrong. Not the nice lady like way to leave. But out is what I wanted.
I called the elders myself!
Oh yeah..... you'll fit in just right on this board. WELCOME !!
Welcome ANEWME
by Crumpet 24 Replies latest jw friends
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Double Edge
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anewme
Hi again, its me. I had to go to town. While driving I was thinking about my confession to you all. You dont really believe it do you??? The Babylon the Great comparison? I was just kidding! Just pretend I never said it. But to add to my story I would like to say I wish I could have just stayed home more from the many meetings. I needed a break. I wanted some relaxing weekends. I wanted my husband's attention. I was ashamed to ask for this. I cant believe I didnt put my foot down more and have the life I wanted in the truth. When I was single I had more control over my attendance and field service. In my 20s I pretty much attended when I wanted to. I was the only JW in my family. But after I married and after my husband became an elder and all my in laws were elders and our nieces and nephews pioneers our lives became more and more a part of the theocratic activities. I begged my husband to let up a bit. We had book study at our home for 12 years and weekend field service. Few would sign up for the hospitality for the visiting speakers, so my husband would always offer our home on a Sunday afternoon. We were poor and our rental home a shambles I thought. I was ashamed of our poor offerings. I felt the bros and sis who attended the meetings and hospitalities at our home were bored with it too. I didnt feel like I was a friend of any of them. I grew tired of the routine week after week. We never took a vacation. Every weekend was for the congregation. Every evening if the phone rang for my husband from a cong. member, there went the evening......And of course there is so much more. Complaining about things like this does little good now. Like I say, perhaps I could have done things differently. I hate to put down the witnesses. There are so many people I love in that organization. They are sweet and good people. I'm sorry I hurt them. I miss them very much...especially the children and the sister from Holland. But, I could not continue in the same routine I was going. I felt sure I would get cancer or something from the mindnumbing routine and boredom. My husband conducted the Bookstudy, Field Service, The Sunday talk and the Bible Studies we shared!!!!! Anyway, I hope you all will not shun me too. I sinned royal scarlet. But I have asked God's forgiveness and in my heart I feel he forgives me. Isnt that enough? What do you think?
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Es
welcome to the board enjoy your stay :) es
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horrible life
I remember as a child, all of the things you described. My father an elder, was always getting calls. With 1 phone in the kitchen, we would be banished to our rooms. Clean for the bookstudy, at our house. Service every weekend. I was a teenager who wanted to sleep in!!!!! I hated it!!!!! I can't imagine being married to the organization.
I might have turned right, instead of left on the way home, myself. welcome again HL
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homesteader
welcome anewme
Yep He forgives. It's called Grace, Amazing Grace.
Now forgive yourself