Challenge for Atheists: Proof of creation!

by googlemagoogle 15 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    here is the proof!

    i don't think you can explain that away! not even you, funkyderek!

    repent and read the gospels

  • DannyBloem
    DannyBloem

    I just rupped my hands warm to type some extra spicy messages, then we get this

    He he

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    The Shrine of the IPU is the Laundry Room.

    It is proved because, if you notice in your socks - you often find holes in them when you pull them out of the dryer - pierced by her horn during a visitation to your shrine - doubt it not!

    Sometimes the whole wash comes out pink - a proof of Her Pinkness if there ever was one. It is said that She cavorts with one of her chosen Stallions in the midst of the spinning laundry. It is the afterglow of their lovemaking that imbues clothes with Her pinkness.

    Also ye may know that ye have been especially blessed if you find that one of your socks has gone missing. Surely a sign from Her Horniness. If anyone questions why ye are missing a sock, simply reply "My Mistress had need of it." No one is certain what She does with the socks, but rejoice for ye were chosen to make this sacrifice. peace be upon her

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    accept IPU into thy hearts heathens!

    Summary of the Major Articles of Faith

    • Our Lady Unicorn is Pink and Invisible.
    • She prefers Pineapple and Ham Pizza to Pepperoni and Mushroom. The latter is said to be eaten only by followers of the despicable Purple Oyster (of Doom). [cf]
    • The Followers of the IPU have more Holy Days than those of all other faiths put together, as any Holy Day of any faith is automatically an IPU Holy Day. Holy Days are used by the Faithful to sow seeds of doubt and uncertainty in the minds of addicts of other religions. The Holiest Day of the Year is April 1 st . It is the day on which the She suggests we find a religious nut and say "There is as much evidence for the existence of your god/gods as there is for the Invisible Pink Unicorn, why don't you check out her web-site, maybe you'll learn something?"
    • A significant number to followers of the IPU is 42. It is the answer to the question, "What is the meaning of life, the universe, and everything?" Importantly, if you add together the digits of the year in which she was revealed, (1+9+9+4) you get 23. If you add 4 (for Her hooves), add 2 (Her ears) add 2 (Her eyes) add 1 (Her Horn), add 1 (Her tail) then add 9 the result is also 42. This proves the significance of Two Score and Two.
    • Certain chosen followers of the IPU are blessed with visitations, shown with signs in their laundry. See the Revelation of The Lost Prophetess of AOL for more details.

  • RunningMan
    RunningMan

    I would like to testify that I have personally witnessed the prodigal sock. After being lost unto me, it returneth, and I welcomed it back into by drawer.

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    I would like to testify that I have personally witnessed the prodigal sock. After being lost unto me, it returneth, and I welcomed it back into by drawer.

    i appreciate that you share your personal experience publicly, although many skeptics may dismiss it without a thought. true believers however know in their heart the ways of our LADY IPU (peace be onto HER).

  • Robdar
    Robdar

    LMAO!

    This thread is hysterical!

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    just a note about the iconography in tetrapod.sapiens post:

    that image is merely a representation of Her Pinkness and should not in any way be taken as a True Likeness. As the Grand High Llama Rich Daniel has proclaimed "Dear Heretic, Only the faithful can see Her. 'Nuff said"

    however, true believers are always struggling with sectarians (and i start to think tetrapod.sapien is one of those), who use icons of the IPU, but this only shows their lack of faith. the TRUE follower of our LADY IPU (peace be upon HER) does not need any icons. our Lady IPU reveals Herself on whom she liketh, and she shure as the blue oyster (of doom) does not like icons.

    tetrapod also quotes from apostate material stating our Lady IPU (peace be upon Her) prefers ham to mushrooms and mushrooms are from the blue oyster (of doom). every logically thinking human knows, that unicorns (whether our Lady IPU [peace be upon Her] or the common unicorn) do NOT enjoy meat, but are vegetarians. thus we can safely say that obviously our Lady IPU (peace be upon Her) prefers mushrooms to ham.

    i suspect the blue oyster (of doom) influenced tetrapod in posting such apostate material.

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien


    apostate??!!

    google,

    you're the apostate from the faith of her holiness! in the original inspired scrolls, it was clearly revealed that ham and pineapple pizza were the route to salvation!

    and if that is not her true likeness, then i don't know what is. i wear her on a lapel badge, and do obesity-ance to her great image.

    do not be swayed by this apostate google dear followers. bow now to the image above so that she may not striketh us down! do not fear her wrath, but love her wrath! tremble with love before her pinkness!

    amenty

    i suspect the blue oyster (of doom) influenced tetrapod in posting such apostate material.
    the blue oyster was the ORIGINAL inspiration reciever/prophet, but has been silenced by conspiracy! woe!

    edit: please also note that googlemagoogle has 14 letters in his heathen name!! ... that's 13 + 1!!!!

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    like oh so many, tetrapod chose to twist exegesis of the inspired scrolls in order to justify his immoral, selfish lifestyle, eating ham instead of mushrooms.

    don't fool yourself, tetrapod! i suggest, everyone reading this thread to further ignore tetrapod's untrue and false word, for they are nice to the ear, as many people like ham or even eggs, so you may be lead astray by his influence. keep reading the inspired scrolls, eat mushrooms, not ham, and wait for the information i'll soon release so you will be saved.

    HE IS A BLUE OYSTER FOLLOWER!

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit