treat you as they use to ? Still get together with you, when possible? Im df'd and I have a family member who will still go to the bar with me, come to my house and hang out with me, but in certain situations, he wont because the witnesses may may see. Places like restaurants where the witnesses frequently go, it wont happen. But where ever he can he will. Some find that terrible, but in my case, I love him for it, cause he doesnt shun me. He just avoids the places where he may get caught! The way I look at it is he could be a good little jw, and not associate with me at all!!! Cheers to the fence riders that still love their family!
Do you have family members or friends in the "truth" who still.............
by ButtLight 10 Replies latest jw friends
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JH
I had an uncle and aunt in the JW's years ago. They both passed away. But when my uncle was alive, he was disfellowshipped. I spoke to him anyways. I didn't care about the rules of the Watchtower. I talk to family no matter what. Often we ate together at Burger King, and he paid...lol
I'm glad that your brother still talks to you.
Could it be that he thinks you'll come back, and that's why he talks to you?
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ButtLight
no jh, I dont think thats it, I personally think he doesnt believe in shunning his own family members. He never asks me to go back or even attend a meeting
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JH
But he is riding the fence, right? If he was a devout JW, would he still believe that shunning the family is wrong?
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delilah
I guess I was the fence rider, while I was still an active member, as I never turned my back on anyone who was DF'd or DA"d....Family is family, to me, and without them, we have nothing.... same with friends. Years ago, as a teenager, there were about 10 kids I knew, that were all DA'd, and I refused to stop talking to them. I told my mom, "they were never baptised, so we can't treat them as if they were." I believed then, the society was wrong on that, and what? 10 years later, they recanted it, apologised and welcomed them to come back???/ What a crock! They ruined how many lives at that point with that stupid rule.....
Delilah
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HadEnuf
My husband's brother and mother are still somewhat "active" JW's (though not pioneer material), and have never shunned us or treated us poorly. In fact, I think my brother-in-law is closer to my husband now more than ever before. They go to concerts together and I don't think he cares if they're seen by JW's or not. (But...we aren't DF'd or DA'd either...so this could make a big difference, but even then I think they both would treat us the same). But they are the only ones left in our respective families who still treat us like human beings.
cathy l.
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ButtLight
This is the major, and most important thing I have that I just do not agree with in this religion. Jehaovah is a loving god! So, would he really expect families to shun one another? Others, maybe for bad association I can agree with. But not family! After being df'd, a funeral can bring all of my family members to talk to me, but never after?????? WTF? Why is it ok then? And not now? I dont understand their whole thinking process.
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Fatfreek
Years ago, as a teenager, there were about 10 kids I knew, that were all DA'd, and I refused to stop talking to them. I told my mom, "they were never baptised, so we can't treat them as if they were." I believed then, the society was wrong on that, and what? 10 years later, they recanted it, apologised and welcomed them to come back???/
Hey, Delilah, I've never heard of such. Then, again, I've been gone some 28 years. Please fill in some of the details on this one. Plus, the society APOLOGIZED for something? I've gotta see that one.
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Netty
I was trying (like a dummy) there for a while to get my family together, (parents are in the truth, some siblings are, some are not, my sister is df'd). It worked a couple of times, when I had them over to my house. But when my parents anniversary came up recently, I really wanted to go to a restaurant instead. I was tired and just didnt want to do the cooking or cleaning. Then I had the whole thing explained to me by my mother ad brother. What it boiled down to was, "somebody may see them associating with a df'd person" Although on the one hand, I am glad at this point in time, they have bent a little on the associating with my sis behind closed doors, but on the other hand, it is just a little hypocritical to me that the only reason they wont do it in public is because someone may see them.
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Aude_Sapere
** it is just a little hypocritical to me that the only reason they wont do it in public is because someone may see them.**
Sorry, It's a LOT hypocriical.
Cults Suck.
-Aude.