How to tell a close friend...

sinis

Well, after much prayerful thought and earnest research I have come to the conclusion that the WTS/ JW 's are just another religion. For me it was not only the UN but also all of the doctrine surrounding 1914. Thus if 1914 is wrong than there is no "Faithful and Discrete Slave", no "class" distinctions, etc. I'm not going to turn into a JW basher as some do when they leave - to each his own. My main motive was that I seek the truth and will continue to do so through research and Bible reading.

The funny thing is I truely feel liberated and realize that I am no longer under compulsion to go to meetings. Meeting here (or elsewhere) or talking with others that appreciate the bible and encourage research and clarity on matters is really all that is important. For by doing such things we are never really forsaking the gathering of ourselves. I would probably take the ultimate step of DA myself but realize that I have friends and family that I would like to keep associating with... which brings me to how I should deal with a good friend of mine.

I have a friend who lives out of state and occasionally visits me. Currently he is a MS and though he may not be a "holy roller" he is very serious about the "truth". Today he called and asked me when the summer assembly was as he wants to come down and visit. I beated around the bush since I have no clue, and told him I would call him in a couple days after I found out. Realistically I don't go to meetings, and probably never will. I had no intention of going to the assembly either. What should I do? Should I go and bite the bullet or tell him how I really feel and risk loosing a life time friend? The funny thing is its not like I am an "apostate" as I'm sure he would label me, but a seeker of truth. Lately, I feel like a heavy load has been lifted off my shoulders - through prayer, research, and study I have chosen the "light load" the Jesus spoke of...

carla

Congrats on getting out of the org! I'm not a jw, never was, the others here can help you better with your question. You should know that not everybody here "bashes" the wt. Many just miss their families and are frustrated. Many have been deeply hurt by the org and are in the process of tying to heal. Some are just plain pissed off at the org. Some have feelings ranging from rage to deep sadness. Stick around and you will find all kinds here. As it should be when people are free to be themselves. carla

cruzanheart

Welcome, sinis! I would be up front with your friend and see how he takes it. You may be very surprised, in a good way!

Nina

kls

Welcome Sinis and am so glad you are finding freedom from the wt but as you said you are not an Apostate but being here you will be considered as one . You will get many answers to your question but mine answer is it is up to you if you feel you will lose your friend and that is something you can live with then tell him and maybe he will see the truth of the wt and also leave. You may also lose him all together so it is up to you to decide.

JamesThomas

Welcome Sinis (is that after the old Greek tree-bender?)

You say that you "seek the truth". A word of warning: the "truth" may be far bigger than the Bible, so prepare for that.

Should I go and bite the bullet or tell him how I really feel and risk loosing a life time friend?

Is someone you can not freely and honestly share your feelings with, a true friend? What have you got to lose?

j

sinis

Thanks! When I look back at the years of service I really don't feel bitter, just a little sad. I believe that the WTS should really look at ststements that have been made or predictions that never happened and apologize to those that have been ship wrecked in there faith. The WTS does have many positives but some of the things that have been done are very serious. In the back of mind I keep wondering if they really are the TRUE religion and I have been duped by Satan but somehow I keep coming back to square one and a little voice that says to test the bible and seek guidance in prayer. I only hope that if I have made the wrong decision that Jehovah will understand and have compassion - something men don't seem to do. I do feel a certain "load" or burden that has been lifted from my shoulders - don't know quite how to explain it.

I sometimes wonder (and perhaps some could give their thoughts on this) if the WTS is being used by Jehovah but they have become corrupt. I wonder if it could be paralled with the Jewish religious system when Jesus walked the earth. The religious system was required by all to follow but they were corrupt and Jehovah was soon to punish them, however Jesus did instruct his followers to do as they say but not as they do. I wonder if there is a similiar parallel today? So many things spinning and so many "what if's" in my mind. Hopefully in time I will be able to 100% reckon for myself the truth in this muddy water...

sinis

Welcome Sinis (is that after the old Greek tree-bender?)
You say that you "seek the truth". A word of warning: the "truth" may be far bigger than the Bible, so prepare for that.
Should I go and bite the bullet or tell him how I really feel and risk loosing a life time friend?
Is someone you can not freely and honestly share your feelings with, a true friend? What have you got to lose?
j

Yes, that would be correct. I'm registered under pityocamptes as well. I loved Greek methology in school and found many of the characters intriguing. What do you mean by the truth may be bigger than the bible? Do you mean the bible is a farce? I know what you mean by what sort of friend would not accept certain views, perhaps I will tell him once he gets here.

GetBusyLiving

Hi sinius, welcome to the board. Damn if you don't sound just like I did this time a year ago!

We evolved from apes.

GBL

JamesThomas

Sinis,

Since you "seek truth", you have kind of opened yourself up to be presented with what may be lies.

This may be a little early for you to contemplate, but what are the chances you think (or better yet, feel in your heart) that a finite anthropomorphic deity of ancient desert tribes (one of many I might add) is the actual and true Source of our wondrous and infinite universe?

j

Sassy

Sinis, when I first left, I told a few I had been in regular contact with via email and phone, that I was taking a break. I thought maybe it would give me an opportunity to keep them in my life longer. A few I didn't say anything to at all, since they lived a distance away. However, like you found out, they expect you to know when assemblies and conventions are, etc.. you can only dodge the real truth so long.

For some, they have been able to hold on to some friends who still 'believe'. So it is possible. I know for me, I pretty much lost everyone that was a witness. I couldn't live a lie and they were uncomfortable with anything that might question their foundation.

How to tell a close friend...

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