Jehovah is keeping my step-daughter from getting a job?

by wordlywife 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • Scully
    Scully

    One thing I've started doing with my girls - as a way of staying close to them as they mature and go through the teenager phase - is to have a fun "spa day" at home where we do manicures and pedicures and facials and watch girlie movies and play with hairdos. They balked at the idea at first, but it was so much fun that I want to keep doing it a couple of times a month. It gives us a special time together that's just for us, and hopefully will be a tradition that we keep on doing. At the same time, I'm teaching my girls that it's important to take care of themselves and do things that foster a healthy self-esteem. We've also got a ground rule "whatever is said during spa day, stays in the spa" for whenever we talk about personal stuff.

    I don't know what your relationship with your step-daughter is like, but would she be open to having a regular "fun" time like that with you?

    Love, Scully

  • wordlywife
    wordlywife

    Hi Scully-

    She does not live close to me right now so a fun day wouldn't be something we could do right now, but maye in the future. I do receive e-mail from her, from time to time (Oh my!!!) and she has been pretty open, but not about how she REALLY feels about WT things. I think she is really struggling, but not sure how much of it is with authority, the WT, or just adolscent angst...........

    I plan on just being here and offering her support, no matter what she does.

    WW

  • datsdethspicable
    datsdethspicable

    Wow Scully! I have spa day with my girls too! We do the mud masks, nails, the whole bit. It is fun. Sometimes we have other girls wanting to join in. I wish my mom had done something like that with my sister and I.

    But back to the subject. My step father(elder), back when I was younger, would tell my mom the same thing. That I was not succeeding in life because I was doing something wrong and Jehovah was not going to bless my efforts. Or I was not progressing in the "truth" because I was up to something. He even told other young people that I was bad association. I was a lot better association than most of them.

  • RunningMan
    RunningMan
    some of my behavior in the past would merit major punishment as far as job opportunities

    Well, that's because Satan wants you to be happy with the world, and is rewarding you to make you happy.

    They have it covered both ways, you know.

  • RedhorseWoman
    RedhorseWoman

    Sigh....another of the things that JWs use to prove that whatever happens in a person's life is somehow directly connected to the manner in which they treat their association with the JW organization.

    If they are trying to advance in the JWs and things go wrong, then Satan is putting roadblocks in their path to hinder them from "serving Jehovah." If they are not trying to advance in the JWs, then Jehovah is punishing them when things go wrong, or Satan is trying to deceive them if things go right. On the other hand, if they are trying to advance in the JWs and things go right, then Jehovah is blessing them.

    If's all mental manipulation and coercion to try to get JWs to conform to what the WTS wants them to do.....carrot and stick.

    I think that a lot of your daughter's problem is that she is buying into the whole punishment thing and is probably preventing herself from giving a good impression to potential employers. Perhaps you could suggest that she do some volunteer work in a clerical capacity at a public library, or animal shelter, or any other type of charitable group that she finds appealing. Simply offering her services a couple of hours a week would not put her in a position of feeling that she is trying to make an impression on a prospective employer, but that she is helping others...and it might help to brighten her outlook.

    By doing this, she could also hone her clerical skills, and have some actual clerical experience to put on her resume. It would also show prospective employers that she is someone who is willing to pitch in and help out where necessary. It would probably also help her to dispel the guilt that her father is now trying to place on her.

    Attitude is everything, and if she goes out looking for a job feeling defeated, then she is lessening her chances of actually getting the job she wants. Another positive about volunteering is that she will probably come in contact with those who could recommend her for a job. Lots of people who do volunteer work also work for companies at a regular job, and they could not only let your daughter know about available opportunities, but they could also serve as a reference for her.

  • ESTEE
    ESTEE
    God punishes people by not rewarding them with a job?

    Ask your daughter what her belief is around this. Her belief makes it her reality.

    If your daughter does not really believe it, then she will find herself a job ... no prob. If she believes it, then she may be sabatoging herself.

    My humble opinion.

    Love

    ESTEE

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