Stories like this slay me.
I think he was not only disrespectful to you but to your daughter, too.
He's viewing her as a possession and was playing 'keep away' with you.
If he really respected her and had regard for the sanctity of the child in his possession, he would recognize and support the appropriate discipline that was supposed to be administered at school and just give you the simple information you requested.
What a jerk. I feel bad for your daughter. And he doesn't seem to be doing such a good (over the past several decades???) of raising responsible, self-sufficient people. I sure would be concerned for my child's well-being while in his care or presence. I'm sure he has attitude with her, his children and his wife.
A side thought... Your opening dialog on the phone. Maybe he's offended that you didn't acknowledge him personally in the greeting. Simply went right to xxx's grandma without greeting him and identifying yourself. Just a thought...
He's still a jerk and probably still we be for a few more years - !!
-Aude.