by booker-t 27 Replies latest jw friends
I was very young but definitely remember feeling that they were straight from Satan, because they had once had the "truth" and now were in opposition to God's organization. LOL.
Now, I view apostates as the WHISTLEBLOWERS who take down corrupt CEO's of corporations, or expose lies in the media.... I truly see each and every apostate as someone that is trying to get the real truth out there.
I see the WTS as a mafia type organization that is trying to silence the whistleblowers.
I hated them. But later I felt sorry for them, because they turned their back to Jehovah. And of course I didn?t want to be near any of them. When my friend gave me the book Crisis of Conscience I was so angry with him and I was scared because Jehovah was going to be sad and mad with him. But, thanks to the ?apostate? and my dearest friend, I learned more that I did when I was a ?devoted JW?.
I think the perspective has a lot to do with it, and whether you were raised a JW's or not.
I became a JW at 20 years old. When witnesses made comments usually negative about worldly people I would pipe up and say hey I use to be a worldly person becareful what you say.
Now I didn't have the years of indoctrination till after I was in for a while. So apostates made me curious, and I wondered why the Society was always warning about how apostates could shipwreck our faith. My thought was how could they if we have the Truth and Jehovah? So I never had a hatred toward them but more curiousity about why they were against the WTS. Well given enough years and the situation I faced with losing a son because of the blood policy, I finally found myself an apostate. But still I think that it just depends on the thinking of the individual, how the ones they assocate with react too.
Balsam
I used to say "I can understand that people can be weak and get DF'd, but APOSTATES!!!! How could anyone that knew the "truth" become an apostate." Guess I found out and am happy just being an apostate.
Leslie
To be perfectly honest, they scared me.
It was as if they had a contagious disease and if I had any direct contact with them I would have the disease too.
I can't believe how gullible I was.
My parents must have done a good job sheilding me from any apostates because I only remember hearing about them in general but never knowing anyone who was or seeing any at the conventions.
They must have really taught me good because I didn't even picture them as human. Just the thought of being in the vicinity with one gave me the shivers, as if they were Satan themselves. I pictured crazy eyes and spittle flying from their mouth as they spewed their poison. Like a dirty, insane, homeless person you see on television.
As an adult, the picture changed to an actual person, who turned away from the "truth" for whatever reason, and is now disillusioned and full of hate toward God's people to justify their own wrong course. Still demonized of course. I still wouldn't ever go NEAR one.
Now, being one myself, I know that any single person you see out on the street could be one. Just like there's no answer to the question, "What does a child abuser look like?", there's also no profile for an "apostate", just that they happen to be part of the 99.9% of the world that knows the WTS isn't the truth.
I feared them. I thought they were the worst of human beings, totally under Satan's control.
This is also the way I see and hear many now devout JWs talk about apostates.
How very wrong they all are!
DY
Like Narkissos said, before about 1980 there was very little said about apostates in the way the Society uses the term today. The term was most often used in phrases like "apostate Christendom". I don't remember even thinking about apostates, as such, before the 1980s. Once, around 1970, I read a small tract published by Armstrong's Worldwide Church of God that criticized JWs for their six-month Bible study program. This program was instituted because of the nearness of Armageddon in 1975. I was only curious, not the least bit apprehensive about reading the tract. I was cut to the quick when I read a comment that JWs were producing "assembly line Christians" with this program, because I knew it was true.
For all practical purposes I dropped out of the JWs when I started my 2nd year of college in 1979, but still attended the occasional meeting and most of the assemblies. I started up again for about a year and a half after finishing college in 1982. After that I attended as few meetings and assemblies as I could manage, given pressures from my JW wife, but ended up at most assemblies up through 1994. During this time I saw people handing out tracts at assemblies about every 3 years. I'd have liked to talk to them but, since I was always conscious of the JWs around me, never did.
I was vaguely aware of the Society's increased ranting against apostates, but not enough to do anything about it until I bought the books Crisis of Conscience and Witnesses of Jehovah at a Christian book store around 1991. I had no idea that such books even existed until I saw them on a shelf in the store. Reading the covers of CoC, I immediately realized that it was probably a bombshell, and even though I hadn't been a JW for years, it still took me several weeks to work up enough nerve to read it. I remember saying to myself, "Yes, yes, that explains a lot!" while reading it. I read Witnesses of Jehovah first, and it was also very instructive, and turned me on to a number of other books such as The Gentile Times Reconsidered. I had no idea until reading this book that old Watchtowers were available through the Watchtower Reprints reproduced by the Chicago Bible Students. Of course, it took me only a short time to overcome all of my misgivings about reading apostate material, and I was soon producing my own.
AlanF
My feelings were mixed. On one hand, like DA'ed people, I felt they had the truth and turned their back on it. I had heard stories about them holding their own meetings, starting their own religions, all of them were of the "annointed", etc. They sounded like a bunch of loons. I remember them putting fear into us at one assembly as if these apostates would try to attack us. I remember thinking I'd beat the crap out of any of them that got in my way.
On the other hand, there was this curiosity. I consider myself analytical. Surely there must be an argument for what they say. Surely there's some flaw in their logic. We've got "the truth". If I we listened to what they had to say, we could analyze it and show them why they're wrong, just like we do with Catholics and other religions.
It was the reaction of most JWs to avoid talking to them and avoid their literature at all costs that made me even more curious. Why did this guy leave the hall? I know he was smart. What did he find out? It all smacked of a cover-up. We were confronted with other religious beliefs all the time in our door-to-door work. Knowing a bit about what they teached helped us. To me, apostacy was just another religious viewpoint. But the way we had to avoid them made me believe that they actually knew something that was really damaging - something the JWs didn't want me to find out.
When I found out where I could order Crisis of Conscience, I sent away so fast and started reading it immediately. I spent all my free time reading until I was finished and decided not to go back to being a JW.
My feelings were very simple. I felt very curious about them. What could take them away from the truth? I was also a little scared I might be seduced by them and my curiosity about them.
Well, my fears have been realized. It's really wonderful, too.
