having fun with Robert

by seven006 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • seven006
    seven006

    In another thread Robert (You Know) and I had a connection. I learned that he use to roll joints with bible pages. I did the same as a JW teen.
    I preferred the pages from the green bible and he used the King James version.
    I'm going to try and talk him into going into business with me. Holy Smoke Rolling papers.
    He already looks a little like the Zig Zag man.

    I figured with the thousands of JW's leaving the religion they might have a lot
    of New World Translations to get rid of (there are misprints all over the thing).
    Our motto will be "Save a tree, smoke your bible"

    I think we could make millions.

  • SlayerLayer
    SlayerLayer

    Dave that was awesome.

    I styed up all night last night and in my delirious state I wrote this little tune to Robert.

    WARNING: THe following may be considered offensive to some.
    To be sung to Song number 15 "Life Without End--At Last"
    Music can be found here:
    > http://www.l-and-a.com.au/comm/addons/midi/song015.mid

    Can you see with your one eye peoples banding together
    The "evil" class will kick your ass
    You Know's a dookie stain

    Sing out with joy of heart
    You Know smells like a fart
    Oh how you blow
    Ole' You Know
    Kiss my apostate ass

    You're a beast living in grease lower than a used rubber
    Full of hot air No one cares to read your mindless posts

    Sing out with joy of heart You Know's a smelly fart
    Oh how you blow
    Ole' You know
    Kiss my apostate ass

  • VeniceIT
    VeniceIT

    OMG HAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHA

    Looks like Davey's pulled out photoshop again ahhah!!!

    Ven

    "It is easier to fight for ones principles the to live up to them"--Alfred Adler

  • Copernicus
    Copernicus

    It took me a few looks before I noticed the joint in"YK's" hand. ROTFL!!!

    You guys cut NO slack, do ya? That song. . . it brought tears to my eyes.

    By the way, will there be a public stock offering soon? I'd like to get in, this thing has got to be worth BIG bucks - especially with YK's financial savvy!

  • seven006
    seven006

    Slayer,

    That had some humor in it, but I need to come to the defense of my newest and bestes buddy Robert. I figure since he is alone in his thoughts and beliefs he needs a friend and I picked myself for that job. I am going to stick to him like glue. Where ever he posts, there I'll be.

    Most people look at him as an arrogant, close minded, pompous, self serving, insensitive,
    mindless, needle dicked, socially retarded, crass, ego maniac. I myself disagree, I don't think his dick is the same size as a needle at all.

    The guy use to smoke dope and must of had a few encounters with being normal. I am going to try and go where no man has gone before and be his buddy. At first he might not want that but like skin cancer I tend to grow on people. I want to teach him what real friendship is all about. I want to show him how to take his perfect spelling ability and turn it into a courier writing application instructions for hemorrhoid suppositories. I figure I can do the illustrations and he can do the writing. I think that kind of writing is right up his ally.

    You never know, the JW's could be right and if they are Robert is going to be gods wife when he goes to heaven and I want an in with the big guys main squeeze.

    So please stop picking on my Pal or I'll have to pound you. Robert's my buddy and if you know what's good for you, you should think about making him you buddy too.

    Dave

  • larc
    larc

    Dave,

    After reading your post, I had an Epiphiny, or was that heart burn? At any rate, perhaps we should start an adopt a zealot program. I adopted MDS several months ago, but alas, he has forsaken us evil doers. MDS's preaching work is ending this fall, when the great trampling begins for three and a half years. I guess MDS went looking for more sheep like evil doers in other places.

    Anyway, Dave, it is nice to see that You Know has a new buddy.

  • DannyBear
    DannyBear

    Dave,

    You don't write near enough stuff here. I have been sittin here laughing MAO, my lady thinks Iam daffy, she's probably right.

    This was just classic ****I want to show him how to take his perfect spelling ability and turn it into a courier writing application instructions for hemorrhoid suppositories. I figure I can do the illustrations and he can do the writing. I think that kind of writing is right up his ally****

    Bobby is good at selecting verbose language, designed to take one's mind off the 'core'(huh) issue...GOD WILL KILL YOU...so Iam quite sure he can select the most apropos words to describe, the agony of hemmorids, providing the reader with explicit, detailed instruction on the proper insertion of suppositories, wherever one may choose to insert them.

    Like larc, I think you have done well in selecting You Know as a new buddy. WHO Knows it may pay off, when you meet the Big SQUIBB in the sky.

    Your a funny guy, Dave. Keep em coming.

    Danny

  • BERNARD
    BERNARD

    APPLAUD,APPLAUD

    THE REAL TRUTH STANDS THE TEST OF TIME IT, WILL NOT CHANGE, IF IT DOES ITS A LIE.The sun will rise, The sun will set,AN EXAMPLE of The real TRUTH nobody can change.

  • seven006
    seven006

    Larc,

    I am fairly new to this board and do not know who MDS is. I guess I missed out on a little fun. I really don't like going after people like this, I have a lot better things to do but Robert just seems to make me want to play a little. I stayed off this board for quite a while for exactly the type of thing I am starting to do. I'm just going to try and have some fun with it. I don't think Robert wants to play with me though, it won't be much fun once he becomes afraid of me and starts to ignore my posts to him.

    I really do like the guy, I think he has some potential. I believe it is an honorable thing to work with the socially handicapped. It's a guilt / community service kind of thing.

    Dave

  • seven006
    seven006

    Danny,

    Thanks for the kind words. I am trying to be a little careful in what I use humor wise because I do not want to offend any Christians on the board. I myself am not a Christian and never will be but I am concerned about stepping on some good peoples toes. What they want to believe is up to them and if it puts a smile on their face then I think that is a very good thing.

    I go after Robert because he's under the delusion that he is superior to everyone in both intellect and spelling prowess. I do admit he has me on the spelling thing. But I have matched wits with guys ten times his self professed intellect. The smarter they think they are the more fun I have with them.

    Bobby is going put in a good word for me with the big guy once he dies. I just want to help him reach his goals a little faster. I was serious about the hemorrhoid thing, I think he would make a good writer for peoples ass problems. As the great writing instructors always say, "Write about what you know."

    Dave

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