I have this laminated and hangs on my office wall:
A simple Friend has never seen you cry.
A real Friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.
A simple Friend doesn't know your parent's first names.
A real Friend has their phone numbers in his phone book.
A simple Friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A real Friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.
A simple Friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed.
A real Friend asks you why you took so long to call.
A simple Friend seeks to talk to you about your problems.
A real Friend seeks to help you with your problems.
A simple Friend wonders about your romantic history.
A real Friend could blackmail you with it.
A simple Friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A real Friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.
A simple Friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real Friend knows that it's not a friendship until after you've had a fight.
A simple Friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real Friend expects to always be there for you!
I've had that on my wall for several years.. ironincally it was a dub who went it to me.. who I no longer talk to.. turns out he was a simple friend.
To me a real friend will drop what they are doing when you are having a crisis, call and check on you and for that moment put their things aside to help you deal with what ever you need to deal with.........even if it is just to be a listening ear. They know that you will do the same for them in their time of crisis..
and confidentiality? that blackmail material they have as noted in the verse above, they have it, but they would never use it. That was why you trusted them with the information in the first place.. (that and the fact you have their trust and info as well)
A real friend, doesn't have the world revolve around them. They think about you too...
and most of all to me a real friend is not a conditional friend.. like Mulan's friend above.. that is a real friend. I wish my dub friends had been that kind of friend. I'm not even dfd and I still got the shun.. those were my simple and temporary friends... fake.. for they were built on a world of untruths.
Now I build friendships with real people and they add beauty to my life in the most wonderful way. I can count on them if I need them, not like a servant, because that isn't it. It is about caring. You can pay for services, but you can't pay for their heart. That comes from things that are real inside.