Were You Affected By The Cliques In The Congregation????

by minimus 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • minimus

    Every hall has their cliques. Elders and their family/friends always seem to have certain ones that they were close to. I knew of only a few that didn't lament they never seemed to fit into the "clique". You knew you were not part of a clique when you heard an announcement and were the only one(s) shocked by it......Were you part of the "in group"?

  • JH

    Yes, I was affected by it, because I really thought that they were God's people and that the were just and fair with everyone.

    Cliques form when people gather around influencial ones, and almost adore them, and rule out those who don't perform as much.

  • rnovello

    The only time I was ever included in a cliques was when it was time to clean the Hall, my mother and I were always called on for this , but left out of the get togethers. We just got the cleanups.lol

  • stillajwexelder

    no not affected - I was in all the cliques I am ashamed to say

  • Undecided

    There are cliques in all social groups, it seems to be part of human nature. A lot of people are unconfortable in the limelight. I guess I was part of those cliques as I can't remember many of the publishers who were considered weak spiritually and just attended the meetings occasionally.

    My grandma was the one who started the JWs in our area and my dad was the leader for many years. I was the one who, with the help of a special pioneer, started the Eden congregation. I don't know if we had a clique or not in our little congregation. I don't remember having any congregation sponsered gatherings, except the meetings.

    Ken P.

  • hillbilly

    I like a good clique myself. They are wonderful tools that help one rapidly ascertain who to dislike as individuals become a tidy little package. I always found effictive packaging of "like minded" people freed up so much of my limited time and always wholeheartedly appreciated the effort those in those cliqes gave to form their little groups.

    --------Hill (the more I know people the better I like my horse class)

  • iiz2cool

    I was surrounded by cliques in the congregation but never in one. No friends at all for 20 years. It was painful at the time, but it made leaving the BORG a hell of a lot easier.


  • blondie

    I made my own clique....we called ourselves the rejects.

    I figure there are 2 kinds of cliques...

    One, the people who have things in common, children, economic status, age, and don't intend to exclude anyone and are genuinely concerned when it is pointed out to them and they try to change.

    Two, the people who know they are deliberately avoiding certain people they don't like personally (personality traits) or don't measure up to their standards (always higher than God's). Those people find all kinds of "scriptural" reasons to justify their unloving actions.

    Even the WTS recognizes this happens. But they rarely address it.

    w88 10/1 p. 11 Appreciation for Our Brothers ***
    On the pretext that the Scriptures allow for our having warmer feelings for some brothers than for others, are we inclined to rationalize our feelings? (John 19:26; 20:2) Do we think we can express a cold, reasoned "love" to some because we have to, while we reserve warm brotherly affection for those to whom we are attracted? If so, we have missed the point of Peter?s exhortation. We have not sufficiently purified our souls by our obedience to the truth, for Peter says: "Now that by obedience to the truth you have purified your souls until you feel sincere affection towards your brother Christians, love one another whole-heartedly with all your strength."?1 Peter 1:22, The New English Bible.
  • minimus

    So if you weren't in a clique, you were either a loser or a reject, huh?

  • undercover

    Growing up, I was an outsider looking in both at school and at the hall. After I graduated school I became friends with other non-clique types from some of the different halls in our area. We were determinded to be "different" in our own way...not part of the world, but not falling into the JW cliques and standards.

    In doing so and without realizing it, we ended up creating our own clique...one that was harder to be part of than the "standard" ones at the hall. To be "in" at the hall, all you had to do was be regular at meetings and service, kiss elder ass and throw parties inviting the "right" people. We wanted no part of that. We did our own thing, but over time grew distrustful of anyone who wanted to be "one" of us. We didn't want attention from elders and the "in" people who could make it hard for us.

    In the long run we were no better than the ones we came to disdain.

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