It's funny, I'm not really searching for the answers "outside" of me at this point. I've read and read and read so much. I have a pretty good working knowledge of philosophies both east and west, social science and politics. The end of it? Nothing! Ha! Sure, I've learned a lot and have my opinions, but in the end it is the the SELF and the little pond you are in which is where all the important stuff happens.
This is a good start, brad. Just remember, with age, time, comes wisdom. This is where all that head knowledge moves into your heart. You'll know it when it happens. You've done some deep thinking, and reading that I didn't do until my 30's, so you're ahead of the game in many respects.
You're "dilema" is "normal" for a person you're age. (Note: Normal is just a setting on a washing machine). Much like a 25 yo just a year or two out of college, and not yet "satisfied" with where they're at.
Someone said "you're right where you're supposed to be". They're right. I know, you wanna know NOW. and Patience My Arse!. It will come.
Someone else said it will start coming together in your 30's. That I've seen, and experienced, is very true.
AND it's ok to lighten up from time to time and have a good time. Take it easy. Don't think for a change. The thinker gets tired!
You're alright there, Bradly.