update on vicki boer

needs_lots

Hello to all my friends,

I havent been around much lately, and I'am almost scared to post. I came on to give everyone a big hello and to tell everyone whats been going on in my life this past year.

Mostly Ive been trying to put together a normal life after the lawsuit. Scott and I have been busy spending time with our girls. I've also enrolled for my degree in interior design and decorating. I'am almost finished my course and my new business is up and running. It has really helped me to refocus.

One big thing. I've finally decided to go through with charges against my dad. It was one of the hardest decisions I've had to make. It has been 10 months since the police have started their investigation, and it should be at trial in spring. Because the police do everything as well as the crown, Iam not involved at all. I never know what goes on until dates are set. My father has waived his right to a pretrial. Not sure why, so it will go straight to S.Court. I have lost all of my family because of this. My brothers and sister refuse to talk to me or have anything to do with my 3 girls. Guess its hard to support someone when it never happened to you. Time hopefully will heal this. I just want my father to understand the damage he has done. He doesnt get it. I want him to get councelling. Not so much jail time, thats so harash and hard for me to deal with.

Anyway.....I know alot of people who questioned me not sueing my dad or pressing charges, well I decided to be strong and do it. Iam hoping this will be the last step in finally closing that chapter in my life. Then It will be done.

Well.......thats all folks

vicki

blondie

Vicki, I was molested by my father as were all my siblings. I am not in a position to go after him legally. Do your siblings believe you were molested? If so, shame on them for treating you this way. If not, perhaps this trial may convince them. As far as getting help, pedophilies are very resistant to taking responsibility for their actions. They have the highest rate of recidivism in the legal system in the US (probably in Canada).

It's nice to see that you are moving on with your life and have more time to spend with hubby and kinds. I keep thinking I would like to go back to school and get into decorating.

Blondie

Special K

Wow, Vicki

You have been busy.

Glad you found something to sink your teeth in that you like. Interior decorating.

Hope that this trial goes good for you and brings a sense of closure to it all.

all the best from

east coast girl..Special K

morty

Let me tell ya....that girl can decorate...

Love ya Vic...

She's moving on...

shotgun

Vicki & Scott

Thanks for the update and big hugs to you and your girls. It will be nice when all of the court stuff is finally all behind you...soon hopefully.

Enjoy the decorating, I'll look for you on Trading Places as a designer...just don't staple plastic flowers all over the walls like that one designer did.

Shotgun

Lady Lee

Oh Lordy Vicki. Yet another bullet to bite on.

No one. I mean no one should be questioning your decision to file charges against your father or not. I think in many ways that is much harder to do then the challenges you have already taken on.

It is so easy for other people to say "Why not?" They have no idea of the emotional toll it takes on the survivor.

You have proved your strength. I presume this is a criminal case and not a civil one. if so that will make it a bit easier.

But my heart goes out to you and your family.

Oh my family too refuses to talk about the abuser. In fact one brother has not spoken to me in over 20 years simply because I dared to confront my father without asking him (my brother) first. Like I had to ask his permission to talk about it with my father and my brother wasn't even there!!!

I think many of them want to live in their delusion that the abuse or whatever went on at home wasn't that bad. They prefer their illusions. With my father the JWs were not involved in the family yet. I can only imagine how much harder it is with all that JW crap on top of the real issues.

(((Vicki and family)))

Xandria

Vicki,

I am glad to hear you are moving forward with your life and made a decision to go ahead to press the charges.

X.

Sassy

Thanks for the update Vickie. I know it can not have been an easy decision and I am so sorry that your family doesn't understand. Like Blondie said, perhaps the trial will help them realize the reality of what has happened. Its all so sad. I hope you can get through this and move on and all the other things fall into place for you..

Even though we dont know each other well, we've got a good friend in common (Morty)..

Farkel

Vicki,

As someone who was working with Barb Anderson from the early days circa 1999 or so, but before Bill Bowen came on the scene, I have been one of many who have been following your oddessy once it was made public.

I applaud your courage and your current decision. It just might bring closure to your life. Perhaps even belated justice. I don't know. I know MANY like you and the stories I know parallel yours. Some are even more morbid and actually, too scary to even relate on this board.

I applaud your courage and wish you and yours the very best.

I will pray that you get your justice, and I don't hardly ever pray.

Farkel

BluesBrother

Thanks for the update. It is good to see that life is working out. I admire your guts and courage and I am sure that that the family fueds will work out eventually.. I take off my hat to one brave lady !

update on vicki boer

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