elder tries to lecture me on parental respect

by unbeliever 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • unbeliever
    unbeliever

    Ever since I attend the DFing announcement of a friend I seem to be on the shit list of every jdub i come across especially mother. I am at Taco Bell getting a bite to eat minding my own business and an elder is there eating his lunch as well. He engages me in conversation about the weather and I was just waiting for him to get to his point. Finally he does and he asks me what I think about respecting your parents. I was like yes we should respect our parents. He asked me if I have been respecting my mother. Now in the past I would lose my cool and cussed him out. Not this time.

    As sweet as could be I asked why are you asking?? He says that my mom had been speaking to him and that she has been very depressed about my attitude. I was what attitude as sickenly sweet as I could be. He went on about how I would not acknowledge phone calls and when we did speak I would roll my eyes at her and not listen. He quoted some scripture about having an obligation to provide for our parents and another to honor and respect them. I asked him if mother was hungary. He said you know what I mean.

    I asked him what business this was of his. I told him it was a family matter and none of his business. What was his answer?????.,,,,,,,,"I am an elder". I was like sooooo. Again what business is this of yours?? He did not have an answer. I just laughed and I said your not use to people telling you to mind your own business are you. Again no answer. I asked him if he tried to fix family problems on a regular basis. The elder said yes I give counsel. I then asked what his educational background was to dispence such "advice". He told me I use the family happiness book and I have no college background. He told me he didn't need it. Prayer and the literature was all he needed. Now I was giving him the . I told him no "untrained volunteer" was going to be giving me any advice. He didn't get that (JR Brown).

    So anyhoo he reminded me that my mother deserves respect and I told him I would gladly set down with him and mom but only after he became a licensed therapist. Until then he needed to mind his own business. I stayed about 10 more minutes. He did not engage me in conversation again. I am very happy with how it went.

  • kls
    kls

    Damn that was great. I can't believe how you kept your cool and you come backs are wonderful.



  • unbeliever
    unbeliever
    Damn that was great. I can't believe how you kept your cool and you come backs are wonderful.

    That was a miracle. I always lose my cool with those people. From now on, calm from me. It's so much more fun to rattle their chain than cuss them out.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Well, unbeliever, he got more time from you than I would have given him.

    But then the turnaround would be if you were DF'd she would be forbidden to have any contact with you.

    I notice that the said that he uses the "family" book and I don't think he meant the Bible....

    Blondie

  • kls
    kls

    Correct Formatting ,,,,,,,your cool.



  • avishai
    avishai
    He told me I use the family happiness book and I have no college background. He told me he didn't need it. Prayer and the literature was all he needed.

    I'd sure like to ask him what that book says about schizophrenia, ADD, emotional disturbances, phobias, autism, emitional problems due to head injury, nymphomania, satyriasis, PTSD, OCD, etc., etc., etc.

  • recoveringjw
    recoveringjw

    See, I always think of cool-headed piercing comebacks AFTER I leave and it's too late! I am so impressed that you told him to mind his own damned business in such a diplomatic way. Some elders are so self-righteous, it makes me ill . And he probably said, "I have no college background" like he was freakin' proud of it!

    Bethany

  • roybatty
    roybatty

    How old are you? Just curious.

  • gdt
    gdt

    I was waiting for someone to encourage this young man/woman to avoid arrogance and smart-alec remarks to anyone, not just those older, and especially a mother, and to suggest that bitterness and resentment are hardly qualities a mature person would display. Alas, no such support for the principle of being 'obedient to parents' (in or out of the 'truth') . I can't help but wonder what this young person would do if their mum died today? Is it not possible to have someone support being decent as a human and not so awful as if that is a goal? How spiteful and horrible can everyone be? gdt an oldie.(and elder ages ago ) gdt.

  • recoveringjw
    recoveringjw

    gdt,

    You know, I bet that unbeliever does actually respect his/her mum. I think though that this is not the point of the thread. The point of the thread is that it's not any of the elder's business and being completely unqualified to do so, should not be giving parenting or any other advice. This elder most like has no clue about the dynamics of this relationship and should just butt out.

    With all due respect,

    Bethany

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