They hired a JW at my job

by dura-luxe 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • dura-luxe

    A new girl was hired at my job, and within 4 days it came out that she was a Jehovah's Witness. Amazing how you could go years without knowing another coworker's religion, but we all had to know about this girl within 4 days. They had an assembly this weekend, and of course, we all knew exactly why she was taking the day off.

    She can't be any more than 21 years old, just graduated from a 2-year college (which, I guess, is more acceptable than an evil 4-year degree), and has already been married for 2 years. One day, she inexplicably started showing us pictures from her wedding, and her Kingdom Hall looked exactly like the one I used to go to. Immediately I started having flashbacks to my wonderous life of being "married at 18," and I had to excuse myself to go into the bathroom and cry. It makes me physically ill.

    I haven't really said anything to her, because she's just brainwashed, like we all were. I told her that my parents had been Jehovah's Witnesses, but I never told her that I was disfellowshipped. The only thing I can hope to do is show her that I'm not evil or a Satan worshipper. That's how I got out. I just slowly began to see that "worldly" people had more christian, loving qualities than the Witnesses.

    What would you do in this situation? Should I just ignore it and figure it's none of my business, or do I have a moral obligation to try and "help" this girl (which means years of hell as she tries to rebuild her life in the real world)?

  • dh
    What would you do in this situation?

    here's what i would do...

    I told her that my parents had been Jehovah's Witnesses, but I never told her that I was disfellowshipped. The only thing I can hope to do is show her that I'm not evil or a Satan worshipper. That's how I got out. I just slowly began to see that "worldly" people had more christian, loving qualities than the Witnesses.

    kill them with kindness.

  • jgnat

    Yeah, what dh said. JW's try and shove the "right" way to live down everybody's throat. The ideal way to help people is when they want it. Say nothing unless she asks for it.

    I carefully watched my honey's JW brother at a little get together with his "worldly" family. This man has barely associated with his siblings his entire adult life. I was curious what kind of man he was, after a lifetime of living "pure". When he talked about work, he was as normal as the rest of us. But then he got in to his conspiracy theories.....yaaaaah. One of the relatives made a transparent reference to the ugly side of the Witnesses, and I found myself intervening. I changed the subject quickly.

    I mean, leave the poor man alone in his delusion. You have barely seen him in over twenty years. Give it a rest already.

    Would you believe it? I felt sorry for him.

    So, I figure, natural compassion will guide you. Knowing the culture she lives in, you can jump to her defence if her ways start to alienate the other staff.

  • Panda

    Just let it happen the way you normaly would make friends. Be your kind self and she will remember that, because when she hits whatever her personal evil situation will be in the borg then she'll remember you.

  • JH

    She was just hired and already took a day off...

  • BluesBrother

    I guess the others are probably right. It would be kind and in the long term beneficial to let it ride and teach by example .. But I do not think I could do it, particularly if she was showing pictures of her K H wedding and evidently looking to brek the ice and lead to witnessing . I would just like to listen to her comments and say something like.." I could never quite understand about ...... " and get her to look it up for me. Perhaps the paucity of their argument might dawn on her .

    Poor girl, she needs the truth (about the truth). She might leave before you can allow a good example to be noticed . BTW I am sorry that you were upset

  • johnny cip
    johnny cip

    how that's the cat's out of the bag, you can straqighten her out any time she's tries to put in a little witness. if you like you can make her work life miserable. only if she starts. i'de ask here about last years convention were the wt was saying that any jw that was married to a non jw was married to a dead person...john

  • The Thinker
    The Thinker

    well if she knows you are DFed, then she'll treat yuo like yuor poison, but she knows that yuor parents are JW's now, what i would do, is say that you didn't go further and got batized because there were things that you didn't understand and agree with, don't go into detail, slowly she will think about you and slowly she will ask you more in the hope of changing your mind, but it can be a oppounity to help her change her mind, allthough this is unlikely, because the JW life is a Lifestyle not just a belief. I would slowly tell her about all the history of the WTS, how 1914 thingy is wrong, and maybe even show her what you've seen on the internet, eg silentlambs. but let her came to you. bit by bit

    have fun !

  • dawn27

    I found out that one of my co-workers is a witness and I have been inactive and living away from my former congregation. I simply said that I had witness family members and that it would be nice to work with someone with the same background (ugh!!). That backfired, though. I didn't say that I had ever been baptized and she assumed that I hadn't. Eventually, a sister from my former congregation ended up at my place of work (a public place) and said that she knew me. My witness co-worker asked how she knew me and she told that I was inactive and had married an unbeliever and that they "missed" me. I think my co-worker was relieved that I am not Df'd, but now it is always, "When are you going back to the meetings? You are a servant of Jehovah." Right in front of my other co-workers!! Talk about embarrassing, now they probably think that we are both nuts. I think my co-worker feels that I should have told her about my baptized/inactive status earlier. I think your best option is to either talk to her privately and share your story or maybe even avoid the topic (as it is a work-place) and maybe transfer departments if that is an option. I found that leaving out details or brushing over things can come back to bite you, it only takes one person who knows you to tell your story and fill in the blanks. Then, you have one stressful work environment. Just my two cents,, Dawn

  • Country Girl
    Country Girl

    You don't have to handle it any way. Just act towards her like your other co-workers act toward her. The work place is not the place for proseletyzing and conversions, so I would remind her that you are in a professional environment and you'd prefer to keep it that way if she ever starts up. You aren't required to reveal your status to her at any cost.

    Country Girl

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