Update on stuff - mum's had a fourth stroke

by acsot 22 Replies latest jw friends

  • acsot

    For those of you who know me and may have wondered if I fell off the planet, this is what?s been happening.

    Since July 4 th mum has suffered two other strokes, so that makes four in total within in a year and a half. Life has been pretty much work - hospital - home. She was paralyzed on her left side, unable to swallow, and being fed through a stomach peg. The neurologists discussed with us the option of removing all treatment and just letting her go, which we agreed to, since she had specified as much in her mandate. It was the worst time of my life. I think every nurse and orderly and doctor on that floor of the hospital saw me in tears at some point in time. Well, wouldn?t you know, she rallied somewhat, so we had to meet again with everyone and have the tubes and all re-inserted. What a freaking rollercoaster ride!

    Obviously, she won?t be coming home again. We?ve filled in the papers for her to be transferred to a long-term care facility, and so now, while she?s on the waiting list, she?s been moved to a ?transition? floor in the hospital, set up like a chronic care institution, with different activities like pet therapy, music therapy, etc. And ? bingo J !

    A couple of weeks ago her left leg started to have a bit of mobility, and as of this past week she's able to swallow a small bit of pudding, so the nurses are going to try and gradually wean her off the tube feeding.

    The dubs have been pretty good, she gets more visitors than most in the hospital, so that gives me a break. Therefore, as long as it benefits me in this way, I?ll pretend to be a good dub. Everyone thought I was attending a different hall because of my crazy schedule (and also because that?s what I told them J ), so I?m making it official and having my publisher card switched over this month. That at least gets me away from the Witchtower radar of the congregation in my area. Then in a few months of sporadic meeting attendance I?ll probably ?move? again. Living in a large urban center and speaking three languages helps.

    I find rather amusing that some of the dubs keep telling me ?you?re handling all of this really well?, ?I don?t know how you do it?, ?I?m surprised at how calm you are in dealing with everything?. Too bad I couldn?t tell them that my crazy schedule in taking care of mum isn?t nearly as bad as trying to keep up with the insane JW schedule of boring meetings, field service and ?personal study?, not to mention the never-ending guilt trips and Big-Brother-induced stress. As well, mum not being at home relieves me of a lot of stress. I can sleep at night now, without sort of half-listening for whether or not she was up during the night, or her calling me in the middle of the night sometimes when she?d get an angina pain.

    I?ve also re-established contact with my (wordlynormal) cousins. They were very happy to learn I?ve ?un-dubbed? myself and we?ve gotten together a few times now to catch up on life and such things.

    So, that?s the long and the short of it. I know others are going through much worse. I see that both in the hospital and for some of you here on the board. Dansk, I think of you often and hope the prayers and positive thoughts help you to heal. I?ve also signed up for an ?Introduction to Buddhism? course in two weeks, thanks to you (and no doubt unbeknownst to you J ). Corvin, I hope things look up for your daughter. She?s lucky to have a dad like you.

    Bye for now.

  • Pleasuredome

    hello ascot. sorry to hear about ur mom. glad to hear your coping ok though.

  • Scully

    (((( acsot ))))

    We'll have to get together again real soon. I've been wondering how you've been doing. My e-mail and phone are always there for you if you need them.

    Love, Scully

  • acsot

    Hey Scully! I haven't been able to log-on at home since I want to switch from dial-up to cable, but am also re-arranging furniture, plastering and painting, so the internet connection at home is on hold until I know where I'm actually going to put things!

    I'll e-mail you from work, hope you can make it into town soon!

  • kls

    Acsot, that has to be so hard to watch . How much can a body take with having four strokes. I hope all ends peacefully .

  • blondie

    acsot, poor mom and you.



  • Valis

    sorry to hear about your mum ascot...hope you are well..


    District Overbeer

  • wannaexit


    Nice to hear from you. Too bad about your mum. Growing old ain't no picnic. Glad that your mum is comfortable and that you are also doing well.

    I had to LOL when I read how you are dodging the meetings and the whole watchtower crap and no one is the wiser.

    Take care



  • Midget-Sasquatch


    I can only barely understand the clash of feelings that must be going on inside you. I've had two close family friends whose father and mother went through multiple strokes.

    Your Mum understood your feelings, needs and moods before you could verbally express them way back when...that didn't diminish the bond between you...I think it would really boost your Mum to know she doesn't have to verbally speak know either...that bond is still just as strong.

  • acsot

    Midget-Sasquatch: thanks for the kind thoughts; and - welcome to the board! Haven't been around enough to see your first posts! BTW, we're (almost) neighbours!

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