We Miss You ----BUT !!!! We haven't caled you.

by christopherrobin 11 Replies latest jw friends

  • christopherrobin
    christopherrobin

    How Often have you heard this--- only to wonder---why didn't you call, come by

  • cruzanheart
    cruzanheart

    Yes, that's a pet peeve of mine: "Oh, so-and-so asks about you ALL the time." "Well, she has my phone number." Yep, that's a stumper.

    It's so nice that I haven't seen anyone from my old congregations in a very long time. Makes me wonder if I'm just lucky or if there's this crowd of people that see me first and then run in the other direction.

    Nina

  • shamus
    shamus

    It would actually be better if they said nothing at all. That is a pet peeve of mine too!

  • SheilaM
    SheilaM

    Cruzan: I do miss you ....ok I AM A SUCKY FRIEND....

  • blondie
    blondie

    Yah, I hated that too. I would ask why they hadn't called then.....did they lose my phone number....I would write it down on my note pad and give it to them...would they call after that...NO

    When 2 elders met with me on one occasion, they said the same thing, I asked them if they had ever called, sent a card, etc. Of course, they could not think of anything. The only reason they were visiting that time was because someone else had nagged the living daylights out of them to visit me. Did they call first? No, just dropped by and I could only give them 5 minutes, since I had to leave for work. When I told the JW who had nagged them that they dropped by unannounced, they called them and reamed them out. It proved to that JW that the elders really didn't care. They stopped trying to have the elders call on me.

    It's like people asking how are you and they keep walking not waiting for an answer.

    Blondie

  • Maverick
    Maverick

    I was one of those dumb-ass JW's that really believed all the WTS BS about showing concern for the flock. When I was a Book Study conductor or even just the assistant to the Book study Conductor I would make a note of missing people in my group and call them after the Sunday Meeting. If I got their answering machine I would just tell them I noticed their absence and was just letting them know they were missed, hoped everything was fine, and if it was not, they were welcome to call me. I even did this for people outside my Book Study. I called one Brother 40 times in the coarse of four years. How do I know this? He told me. When I split for 30 days, as a test of their love, know how many calls I got?....0! When I started to fade, the one brother I called all those times called me once and came right out and said, "I am not going to ask what is up with you." and he had become an Elder! I got his ass off the phone right then. They never called or asked about me until I sent out the Baptism Nullification letter to the 500, and then only cause I was in their face! They do prove false to its power! Maverick

  • dh
    dh

    i hate these stupid little jw sayings, 'we miss you'

    when they ask, i swear it's just like something they feel they have to say, as if they miss you in the slightest, they don't even realise they are lying when they say it. curse curse curse.

  • Greenpalmtreestillmine
    Greenpalmtreestillmine

    My mother used to tell us not to send flowers at her funeral but instead spend time with her while she's alive because the flowers won't mean a thing to her when she's dead. It's the same with these, "We miss you" things, nice token but it means nothing to those of us who were allowed to suffer all alone without a call or a visit from those who claimed to be our friends.

    Sabrina

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    **when they ask, i swear it's just like something they feel they have to say,

    I looked at it another way......it wasn't that they missed you-it was a subtle way of you having to reply to the "why weren't you here" or "I haven't seen you here" remarks.

    Hearing we missed you and never calling or stopping by to see if you were okay, took the burden off their not-so-sensitive shoulders and dumped it right back onto you.

    If someone DOES have a health problem and gets told we missed you, and if you answer why you HAVE been among the missing---you seldom heard that they would be glad to help out if the illness or condition re-occurs, etc. It's ALL lip service and makes THEM feel better---and does nothing for the one that had the problem.

    We had moved to WV for a few years for my hubby's job, and had trouble getting transportation to the meetings (24 miles away) and one time after a "dry spell" of a couple of weeks absence---I actually had a sister come up and tell me that she thought we had moved back to NY!!!! (Obviously no one had bothered to call, and it was just as obvious that we were standing right there and all that "love and concern" was non-existant)

    Even now after being completely out of the org for so long---I still get a knot in my stomach when I hear anyone say we missed you in any situation!!!

    hugs,

    Annie

  • jaredg
    jaredg

    anni don't get a knot in your stomoach....i'm sure that when your non-dub friends say that they miss you they probably mean it more so than the dubs did!

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