This is very scary for me ......Breath in Breath out ....outing the demons

by SheilaM 29 Replies latest social entertainment

  • SheilaM
    SheilaM

    Ok after 17 years I finally was able to express my pain about my sisters actions.....I hope you like it

    Betrayal of Snow

    Jesus lost his life for 30 pieces of silver

    I wonder how many lines of white my sister sold me for?

    Sold me?least that is what I call it.

    All I know is she had it all planned.

    In debt to her dealer.

    Her crowd druggies, the OU football players spiraling no where but down.

    Somehow I was mentioned, a younger pretty sister.

    She began to weave her web.

    Lies, deception, all numbed by powder cut by a razorblade.

    The mirror never reflecting the truth of what she is?

    Her screams of 17 years ago reverberate through my head.

    Shrill, piercing induced by the snow snorted in the bathroom at Zanzibars

    Words are welded into my soul

    Condemnation of me,

    ?Hick kids, husband? ?How un-cool didn?t I know everyone takes drugs? ?DEA? ?Debt? ?Going to this fucking party?

    My body shook, hollow, chilled

    Looking into the muddy brown depths of her eyes,

    I see instead bricks of white powder waiting.

  • Bubbamar
    Bubbamar

    That's AWESOME!! I hope someday you can share it with her.

  • little witch
    little witch

    ((((SheilaM))))

    Gawd sake........I am so sorry that happened to you....How tragic.

    I lub ya honey, please know that.

    Once again you have put untold pain into poetic words for us to benifit from, and once again I am blessed by your work.

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    Ouch. That's a tough read Sheila, but you said it well.

  • SheilaM
    SheilaM

    Thank you Bubb, LW and Big Tex.....this was a very difficult poem for me. I sure needed a big ole hug from Thunder funny I cried like it happened yesterday

  • shamus
    shamus

    That's about what cocaine drives people to do.

    It wasn't her. It was her addiction. People on shit cannot understand reality. Having someone in my family that has done it most they're life, and 'tricked' everyone into thinking that he was clean, I completely understand.

    Recreational fun my ass.

  • SheilaM
    SheilaM

    Thanks for the comments Shamus it helps me to put it into perspective

  • czarofmischief
    czarofmischief

    Yikes... puts it all into perspective.

    hugs

    CZAR

  • Shutterbug
    Shutterbug

    wasn't her. It was her addiction. People on shit cannot understand reality. Having someone in my family that has done it most they're life, and 'tricked' everyone into thinking that he was clean, I completely understand.

    Recreational fun my ass.

    This brings home the need to stay away from drugs. I lived next to a crack house for about 2 or 3 years and those people didn't care about anyone except themselves and the next time they could get some more drugs. Idiots.

  • Special K
    Special K

    Hi Sheila,

    I read alot of pain there, hurt too

    Sorry this all happened to you, girl.

    Seems like no one on earth can hurt ones heart more than a family member.

    I was watching a biography last night on Yasmine Bleeth. (bay watch babe, Nash Bridges drama, Days of our lives, etc.) and her rise to stardom and her fall to cocaine abuse..it was a sad, sad story of what it eventually did to her life, family and friends.

    ((( Hugs to you ))))

    Special K

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