i hate cheaters, thieves and rapists....but i'm not going to judge here
Double standards Re: Disfellowshipping
Jez, your error was that you failed to threaten legal action.
JWs fear the "superior authorities" more than they fear Jehover.
A married friend of mine got romantically involved with a JW in his congregation up to the point of kissing. He was publicly reproved. One of the elders said to him "This would not have happened if you had a close relationship with Jehovah!"
This happened some year ago and he still has restrictions. But the elder quoted above is no elder anymore because he had a mistress for more than a decade - that is when he said above quoted words...
He is still a JW but no elder any more...
It matters not to me why she committed adultry; she was open enough to tell us, who are any of us to judge her. And why would I want to anyhow? the cong has no right to pry into personal matters, and the only person really concerned woud be her husband. they should not be involved in her life.
and yes, i have noticed men "get away with it" more than women, perhaps b/c women often confess where men don't always.
what a pity that they have us so brianwahsed we go and "rat" ourself out.
Double standards all the way when it comes to consequences.
This cong I used to attend had an incident of 2 young girls fornicating and getting pregnant. The daughter of the heavy elder one got a private reprimand; the daughter of the nobody family got disfellowshipped. Go figure!
When I decided to get reinstated because I couldn't take the emotional alienation anymore, it took me 3 months to get reinstated; some other girl from a neighbor cong that committed less stuff and was out of the org a lot less time than I, took her about a year to get reinstated. Reason? My family is a 3rd generation of heavies within the org.
Also, big double standards if your family happens to have money. BIG TIME FAVORITISM!!!
These and many other inconsistencies show this cannot be God's org. NO WAY!
For several years now, it doesn't matter so much how serious the sin is as much as the "attitude" of the sinner. A person could commit some pretty horrible sins and get away with it if they were "truly repentent." I know a guy who went to the elders because he had had a couple of cigarettes. They asked him if he was sure he would never have another cigarette, and he said he wasn't sure it could never happen again. They quickly disfellowshipped him. Yet, I could name numerous people who have done things far, far worse and they are fine--just as long as they are humble enough when they attend the JC meeting.
I was df'ed for adultryAnd serves you right!
That's a great judgemant to make without knowing all the facts. I was disfellowshipped for the same reasons. I comited aduldery only to get rid of my JDUB husband, with the blessings of many family and friends. Sometimes it's the only way to get rid of emotionally abusive JW spouses.
This cong I used to attend had an incident of 2 young girls fornicating and getting pregnant. The daughter of the heavy elder one got a private reprimand; the daughter of the nobody family got disfellowshipped.
At the same time when my friend mentioned above had his "kissing-incident" an elder's grand-daughter was fornicating and got pregnant. Despite there people who told her in when she was kissing in public she got only reproved privately when it was obvious while my friend got a public reproof.
BTW, his wife got shunned by many in the congregation including the wife of the later uncovered adulterous elder. Later, this eledertte tried to apologize to her.
I'm still technically a Jw never got df'd or anything just inactive (actually i'm an athiest i just don't bother them) and i do go to meetings occasionaly to keep the wife happy (mostly just memorial) and i don't really do anything that would get me df'd if anyone knew about it.(although i am registerd to vote)
But the double standerd thing is RAMPANT you'll never get away from it i know of a case where a woman got away with having affairs for YEARS we all thought it was odd until we found out she was sleeping with two of the elders who were always on her judicial committee! hahahahahahaha talk about laugh out loud! I also know of a case where a pioneer was drugged and raped and the "brother" responsible was publicly reproved but not df'd and then... ready for the punch line... so was she because she shouldn't have been out with him alone and put herself in that situation!!! unreal.
My stand on adultury and fornication has changed a lot tho' as an athiest i really think that whatever is good with your mate and you is great if you want to swing do it if you want to be monogomous do that what the hell business is it of anyone elses!?