How can I get my daughter, who's in j.w. Bible study, to look at this forum

by hubert 29 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • hubert
    hubert

    Well.... What a great response! Thank you all for your input. Maybe I should have given you a little background about my situation, before jumping into the forum like I did. So I'll try to keep this as short as possible, so not to bore anyone. LOL !!

    I am married, with two wonderful daughters, and one grandchild, which we all love dearly. My wife and I get along great with our two daughters and the one son-in-law. A few years ago, my wife's sister started working with two j.w.'s, and at the time was questioning the Catholic (which we are) religion. At the time, not knowing anything about Jehovah Witnesses, we figured, well, if she's not happy, then maybe she should change. I myself figured, "At least it's a religion, so what's the harm"? ( MANY people feel this way, at first). I've had people tell me this, too. Ignorance of the W.T. is one of the main problems in this "worldly" world, IMO. So, in time, she became a j.w. As time went on, her husband, and two daughters became j.w.'s, also.

    Getting back to us, My wife is a devote Catholic. I am not as practicing as she is, but I go to church every Sunday with her, and our kids ALWAYS went to church with us, when we were bringing them up. (My wide also teaches ccd, and went to a Catholic boarding school, so you can see she is well entrenched in the Catholic religion. I'm not trying to promote this religion, I just want the "objectors" to see that this was not the problem with our family, so that's not why our daughter got into the J.W. study. We all have a deep love for each other.

    Our daughter and her husband have swell relationships with the rest of the family, which includes us. They even celebrate Easter, Christmas, birthday parties, and more, with us.(so far). However, they would NOT go to the church when her Godchild made her First Communion, so we know it's starting.... They are starting to get unfluenced by what they are hearing at the Biblestudy, and they do go to the hall, too, on Sundays. We feel "what's next? What will they miss next time? That's why I had the two hour talk with them, to try to get them to go, for the sake of our only granddaughter, to which she is the Godmother to. (or was). She did come to the house to help set up the party after the First Communion, but she still wouldn't go to the church to see her Godchild there. She claims that "they are forced to make their F.C., so we don't feel comfortable with it. So, I said, "How can you feel comfortable with "pedophile paradise"? She said "when there's a problem like that in the W.T., the people get thrown out, unlike the Catholics. It all comes down to the J.W.'s bashing all other religions. (Look at me, I'm rambling on). Sorry.

    To end this long story, I believe that my sister-in-law got involved with the j.w.'s because she needed something in her life. She was having family problems, and I think she felt like this could be a second family for her.

    As for my daughter, she says she wants to study "the only true Bible", and also I feel she feels bad for her aunt, that can't get any of the family into the J.W. religion. This is what my daughter has told us. Our family is very close, even though this problem exists. I'm not saying there's no friction, there is at times. So, that's about it. One good thing about it is, my other daughter has been willing to READ all the research I've been compiling, and because of it, I don't ever have to worry about her and our granddaughter getting involved with the W.T.

    So, I read all your posts, and took notes, and plan to use much of this information to help us learn more about the clutches of this cult. I'd like to thank each and every one of you for your help and advice. Thanks for being here for us. I love this forum. Keep up the good work..... Hubert. (I'll stick around).

  • kls
    kls

    Hubert, please do stick around, you will learn new things here ,i still do . Remember there is no magic or easy way to get a loved one out of this cult. It is like beating your head against a wall ,actually you would get more out of that, at least a headache. Many here even with all the knowledge we know of this cult have not gotten our own family's out, but feel free to ask questions and know we are here for moral support.

  • allpoweredup
    allpoweredup

    Send an email to which I can send it and I'll email you some things that are both scriptures and reasoning based which you can hand or mail them. Send to [email protected]

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    Wow, there is some great advice here about your limitations on what you can do, and what you should scrupulously avoid. Unfortunately, we cannot force people out of bad decisions. Sometimes we have to stand on the sidelines and wait until their need becomes strong enough that they break free.

    Any ANGRY outbursts or STRONG resistance to her new lifestyle will drive your daughter ever closer to the cult, because she has been told to expect this. She has been told that such resistance comes from Satan himself.

    Wherever possible, reinforce her ability to make up her own mind on things, and encourage her independence (even if, in the short term, it drives her farther away). One thing I was slow to learn but is very important, is don't bother arguing with the "cult" self. You will learn to recognize this new "personality" as quite distinct. This "cult personality" decided not to attend the communion service. Instead, address your daughter's genuine personality. Reminisce about the activities and memories from her childhood.

    Possibly the most heartbreaking aspect of this religion is how it removes loved ones from family events like communion, weddings, Christmas, Birthdays, and Thanksgiving. It is a terrible thing to be a part of. I dearly hope you manage to keep as much contact as possible with your daughter.

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    Welcome...

    You stated your daughter said she wanted to study "the only true Bible".... well, the JW one she's been studying with is NOT going meet her wants. The JW Bible (NWT) was put together by an "anonymous" committee...what are their credentials? Who knows? Check out this website for more information on the problems with the NWT translation: http://www.jude3.net/JWISDM.HTM

    Another thing that she might consider is the history of the JWs. Originally they were known as Bible Students. Then about 30 years from their beginnings, things started to change...dramatically. A politically renegade group took over the organization and they changed their name to JWs. By the way, the Bible Students are still around with their 'clear' doctrine, they haven't changed....so knowing that, who is right in their understanding of the bible?

    Good Luck .... (can't say that if you're a JW...it's forbidden )

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    u could try telling them all the things that JWS can't do, birthdays, holidays etc, and be sure and really discuss the blood issue. Many new ones don't quite get the idea that they really mean "die for your faith". This could be effective esp. if there are small children involved or they may want to have children.

    welcome to the board. I like the advice about being very loving to them, b/c they are being told u will hate them..In reality they are the hateful ones(jws that is) b/c they are being told to put serious boundries on their relationship with u.

  • hubert
    hubert

    Thanks, everyone. I am taking notes, and sorting out ideas with your advise. I know nothing may work, but I'll keep trying.

  • allpoweredup
    allpoweredup

    Here's a good one with scriptures and information to de-program them about Christmas

    CHRISTMAS' ORIGINS DIFFER FROM WATCHTOWER TEACHINGS TO JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES AND THEIR BIBLE STUDENTS: More recent scholarly studies prove that the Christmas Tree is from the Tree of Eternal Life (Genesis 2:9, 3:22) depicted in church plays of the Middle Ages, not Luther or Druid tree-worshippers, although outdated articles for example in World Book Encyclopedia still repeat the legends and Luther may have originated the use of candles attached to Christmas trees. An interesting point often ignored by those against using trees for Christmas is that some of the giant cedars of Lebanon were used to build the holy temple in Jerusalem .

    In fact Christ himself was wrongly attacked as a "glutton and drunkard" simply for believing in a good time (Mt
    ). He once turned water to wine at a wedding party in (John 2:1-11), told followers to invite needy persons to parties (Lu -14), and accepted gifts including expensive nard oil. Interestingly, Revelation 1:14 even describes the resurrected Christ's hair as like "white wool" or "snow," his cloak was scarlet-colored (red with a bluish tinge--Mt 27:28), and white symbolized purity. True, all that just coincidentally reminds one of Santa Claus, but do note that the earliest Christians enjoyed balanced merriment at "love feasts" (Jude 12), the angels celebrated Christ's birth (Lu 2), and Job's children had enjoyed birthdays (Job 1:3, 3:1, 3).

    Most Christmas trees are topped by a star remindful of the Christ star. According to John Mosley's The Christmas Star (1985) from September 3 BC to June 2 BC Jupiter, known as "the royal planet" passed Regulus "the king star" in the constellation Leo, reversed then passed again, turned and passed a 3 rd time. By June 17 Jupiter and Regulus were so close they seemed a single star when seen by the eye. This then is one intriguing possible source for the Christ star in the Bible.

    Before Christ's birth unspecified men called "magi" in Biblical Greek came from the East first to Jerusalem (Mt 2:1-2) then went on to find the Christ child in Bethlehem. Some translations render the word magi as astrologers because its root like the word "magician" is linked to the idea of being a person of great might but although magi may refer to people who try to predict the future by observing the stars, using omens and consulting spirit beings as forbidden by God at Deuteronomy 18:10-12, it can also refer to people who worked to predict future weather patterns, good times to plant and harvest, buy and sell crops, etc via careful observation of the clouds, stars and other natural phenomena and with very little to absolutely no special focus on the occult at all. So for solid reasons some Bible translations continue to translate magi as simply "wise men" or "stargazers" and this is also supported by the Bible?s positively saying they brought gifts for Christ then also protected him by leaving without telling his location to King Herod who wickedly desired to slay him.

    Persons such as Jehovah's Witnesses who kept their families from celebrating Christmas should not be condemned if they acted out of lack of accurate knowledge in the past, being mistaught by their leaders and magazine articles, but also no Jehovah's Witness or other persons, once informed with this, should keep claiming that those who do celebrate the birth of Christ are out of harmony with the Bible or "immature" (as they have sometimes written and said) even as the preceding information proves. Please also go to, read and meditate on what Paul writes at Colossians 2:16.

  • hubert
    hubert

    Thanks for the info, allpowerdup.

  • somebody
    somebody

    Hubert,

    From what you have told us, it is too late to "talk" to them. ANYTHING you say that in any way even suggests that the JWism even could stand a chance of being wrong about ANYTHING will cause your daughter to cut out all communication with you and your wife very soon. I'm surprised that they even celbrate holidays with you and I'm absolutely sure that nobody in the JW congregation knows that they do becuase they keep that to themselves. And I don't think you understand what the WT teaches it's followers ( JWs) about the Catholic relgion spacifically. PLEASE, and I am begging you to talk to Bob Pardon. Get in touch with him, or send him just what you have posted here so that he understands your situation. believe me, as you said, not many people are educated at all about JWism because they do not know too much about the sect. Even parents of rebellious teens have been grateful for sects such as the JW sect. Only when it is too late did they realize that their children, even when grown have gone from the fire to the frying pan. Only those who have been involved, usually for years INSIDE the walls of the JW sect can tell you how it destroyes the family unite so bad that it is heartbreaking. Some adults have PARENTS who are in it and they miss their parents so badly. They regret even trying to talk to their parents about it, because it caused all contect to cease. You have a granchild too. so that makes it even more heartbreaking. I don't even know where to start but to say that it doesn't matter if young or old or educated, ANYONE can fall victim to cults.

    So PLEASE, either make a phone call to Bob and you can tell him I told you to call, (My name is Gwen Wallace) or write to him. He will correspond to you my mail of phone. He is located in in Lakeville MA and has helped many people who are in cults, or that have family members in cults INCLUDING the JW cult.

    If you wish to contact him by e-mail and forward your post on this board to him, his address is [email protected].

    You can read a little about him and his wife Judy ( who is very sick right now so you might not hear from her) by doing a search on google about Bob and Judy Pardon. They hold group sessions that have helped both harold and I immensely. They have helped him as newly trying to exit JWism mentally, and myself too even though I left JWism over 25 years ago. It's harder to exit cultsmentally, than phsically. That is why so many stay. For they cannot handle it mentally, even if doubts eat away at them. Bob and Judy will help any way they can. the group sessions are only for those who WANT to attend. Their is no ostricsim by any means for those who don't want to. It's just added support for those who think they can benefit by it. And I'm telling you this because at first, I was worried that I was going to be involved in another cult if I atteneded. I was afraid of getting sucked into something! Now I know better. :-)

    http://www.neirr.org/

    http://www.excultworld.com/interviews/Pardons.htm

    peace,

    gwen

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