Hi, I'm new

by danidancer 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • danidancer
    danidancer

    I'm a 30 years old women. I was witness for about 11 years and left them 3 years ago. It's been a very hard time to get used to the reality. I came out being very nave and made a lot of mistakes trusting man and women. Now I watch more people, don't trust them quickly, but I used to protect a lot myself from people and so many times I feel very lonly. I realized that the way I'm it's why I could belonged so good to witness, because I've strong values that I really appreciate. First, I thought I could ignore them and do what I thought I wanted, but the true is that it hurted me when I did things I consider not good, do you understand me? And now I don't like people that consider sex as a toy or an object to use and to get selfish pleasure. But there are a lot of that kind of people. I can't judge them, and the fact is that I talked to them, but try to avoid them, because it's hurts me a lot to hear about their lifes. That's why sometimes I miss the witness and the time I spent there, because I miss the spiritual I used to read and the fact that I could find people that thinks and act like me. I consider the possibility to get back to them, but one of the reason I left is that I've my doubts that there's only one truth and salvation. In fact before I left I asked this question to the elders, told them that I wasn't sure and they gave the answer: "What if this isn't the truth? Don't respond me... this is the best thing we can have." Of course this answer didn't satified me. When I left I read the book Crisis of Consiousness of Raymond Franz and got a sorprized of the witness' history. So this year I wrote a letter to Brooklyn and asked questions about what they hide. I didn't attack them, in fact I respect them anyway, but they forward my letter to my country and the branch office of my country respond me, telling me that I could ask them an appointment with them to respond my questions. I got dissapointment of this. I consider the possibility to write Brooklyn again... I know that my lonlyness won't solve getting back to them, because in fact I really felt lonly there, but there's some spiritual food I like and more chances to know maybe a good man and friends. But to belong them I've to be sure of everything. If not I can't go back. But if there is no one truth I don't know how to find friends, to feel less lonly, to find someone to love... any thought please?

    Thanks,

    danidancer

  • Valis
    Valis

    welcome dani. Always nice to have new faces. BTW, don't worry about "knowing how to make friends" here...Spend some time reading and getting to know us. We're generally a good lot and from your post I gather you will find many here with the same kind of life story. Welcome to the board!

    Sincerely,

    District Overbeer

  • Brummie
    Brummie

    Welcomeaboard dannie

    Sorry you have to go through this, many here will relate to you and I hope you will find good freinds. the 1st 3 years are the hardest but its a time of finding your feet and finding our who you are.

    Be patient with yourself, it gets better with time.

    Brummie

  • Markfromcali
    Markfromcali

    Hi Dani, welcome.

    I will be blunt here - just because someone reads and does stuff the Watchtower says, that doesn't mean they are spiritual - even if some of the things it says kind of reflects these values. The reason I say that is because spirituality goes much deeper than that, it isn't just about getting these ideas in your head, going out in service and such.

    Because that's all many did as JWs, they really don't know their own hearts very well. Since leaving many ex-JWs have gone into a deep soul searching, and because of that they are in a better position to relate to you. When someone hasn't even begun to do that, how can they connect with you on that level? So in this sense a lot of exJWs are more spiritual than JWs. Don't worry, there are better times ahead.

    By the way, which country are you from?

  • Deleted
    Deleted

    Hi Dani, welcome to the next leg of your life's journey. I think we all felt like we went through a divorce when going through the realization you have just begun. It will take you a while to feel good again. Hang in there. You'll always find someone on this forum to help. Soon you will realize that it's not you at fault. Things will get better and better. Glen

  • Celtic
    Celtic

    Awwwwww you darling, hello, how do you do, I'm Mark from West Cornwall in the UK, looking forward to seeing more of you and your posts and sending you my very warmest best wishes and kindest regards, welcome aboard balmpot.

  • proplog2
    proplog2

    Dani:

    You seem to have an East European style of writing. Do you care to say which country you are in?

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere
    the branch office of my country respond me, telling me that I could ask them an appointment with them to respond my questions

    This is because they don't want their responses to be in writing. This would leave an official paper trail. In a personal meeting they can tell you whatever they want, and then later deny everything.

    This is what they did to me.

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    Hi Dani.... WELCOME ! There's a lot of good people on this board to help you figure things out. We look forward to your posts.

  • danidancer
    danidancer

    To everybody:

    Thanks for the welcome! I'm from Chile, Southamerica.

    Elsewhere:

    Could you tell me please what exactly did you ask and what they answered and denied? I asked them 10 questions and they told me that it would be better for me, to ask them in a personal appointment in their branch office and they just answered me only one question about the conexion of the Watchtower and the United Nation.

    I wrote to Brooklyn because I asked some questions here to the elders and their answer didn't satisfied me and also because what the Watchtower did in the past wasn't the decision of my country branch office, it was the central office's decision. I prayed to God for answers if they have the only truth, that's whay I got dissapointet of their respond...

    danidancer

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