Blog in honour of my Stepmom

by jgnat 69 Replies latest jw friends

  • Angharad
    Angharad

    (((((Jgnat))))

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    ?Oh, jgnat, glad you called gasp your Auntie is flying in next week gasp will you be around gasp good, good, will you take her out to tea? gasp yes, I can?t do much here gasp but your sister gasp is coming up to town gasp on gasp Family Day.

    That?s the only day she can make it gasp she is on call that week gasp . I won?t be able gasp to make a big dinner or anything gasp I just don?t have the energy gasp any more.

    But the gasp buffet world gasp has a special on Family Day. Only ten dollars a person. You like the idea, good, good. gasp Oh, me, I am as fine as gasp can be expected gasp . You know. Your son called gasp for the other day for grandpa gasp I told him he was at his gasp bridge game. Does he know? gasp I felt uncomfortable, not wanting gasp to explain what is going on. gasp You have? Good. Good.

    Well, I better not stay long. gasp . If I talk to long the words gasp all start slurring together gasp . We?ll see you on Family Day gasp then? Good good. Love you, too dear. Take care.?

    .....................

    Cancer is too slow. Cancer is too fast. A giant of miniscule scale, He marches in to my life. Uninvited. Inexorable. I shadow box that giant ghost, gripping air. That monster stalks is my mother, my stepmom, my Myrna. The beauty of her soul shines; she needs us, all around, gathering, chattering, surrounding her enveloping her with the inconsequential bits of our daily lives. We kill her, visiting her. But she embraces her own end. She embraces the cancer, inviting it to hurry up and finish its? dirty work. She is calling herself home. Before she leaves, she is embracing us all.

    I love watching the beauty of who she is, reduced to the essentials. I hate watching her go.

    (A note about my Schizophrenic son. Yes, we have explained to him what is happening to his grandma. His own illness, though, means he is completely self-absorbed. I am not sure he even remembers that our Myrna is sick and won?t be with us much longer. He will grieve in his own way, a man who marches to a different drum.)

    Angharad, soon, we can hug in person. It would be lovely if you could meet my Myrna, but I guess it is not to be. I look forward to a blossoming friendship.

  • wordlywife
    wordlywife

    ((jgnat))

    I did not realize you were going through this. I lost a dear aunt to cancer (aggressive malignant melanoma) 5 years ago, who had a huge influence on my life. I miss her.

    I'm so sorry...............can't find the right words at all right now.

    worldly wife

  • Will Power
    Will Power

    (((())))

    You are both in my prayers

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    Thanks, ladies. Today is a teary morning. I haven't cried until I wrote this down.

  • frenchbabyface
    frenchbabyface

    (((JGnat and StepMom))) ...

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    FBF

  • anuva
    anuva
    When in crisis, I am a let's-get-cracking kind of girl. I can't stand to stand by and do nothing. My best friend gave me a great idea. I have decided to let her know how special she is to me by making up small notecards telling her how much she means to me, and delivering them regularly to her mailbox.

    this is the spirit , very few people have in this world jgnat, and you are such a gem in the life of people who are your loved ones, i wish i could be near you and share your heart .....with all time in the world...

    i will pray for your stepmom,and wish her better recovery .

    love always

    anuva

  • Aude_Sapere
    Aude_Sapere

    No words but deep thoughts and strong feelings of sadness for what you are going thru.

    Hug when you can. I'm glad you were able to share and express so much with Myrna during the past year. That in-and-of-itself is such a wonderful gift to treasure always.

    -Aude.

  • Gretchen956
    Gretchen956

    ((((((((jgnat))))))))))) I can't believe I never saw this thread until today! I'm so sorry to hear about your stepmom, what a wonderful woman she is! I know having you there to remind her of all the ways she is special and to remind her of your love for her makes this difficult time more bearable.

    My prayers and healing energy go out to you and your family. Blessings to all of you.

    Sherry

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