Lost,
My now husband of almost 9 years has decided to study with the JW since almost 30 years after leaving them in his teen years ( his parents are/were JW) We have a 8 year old daughter. When we married he said he had no intention of going back. When our daughter was expected he agreeed to raise her in the Catholic Church but he wouldn't attent that church, or any other. ( should have been a huge red flag for me but I was very niave).
He decided to begin studying with them two years ago this coming June.
This loving kind, giving , mild mannerd man turned into a defensive, pushy, ( passive) verbally abusive man who just last month culimated in his anger towards me for not agreeing with him, physically abused me. I was in a total state of shock. I called the polievce and had to get x rays to make sure o bone were broken when he shoved me to the floor and across a table.
I found a therapist that specializes in spiritual abuse as he himself was raised in a cult. I am learning the best way to handle him. There are no promises, and I may have to sead a seperate life from him. Completely opposite of what I expected all these years. If I knew when we were dating, what I know now about the JW, I believe I would have ended the relationship. It is pure hell to watch my loved one walking into the fire of this mind controlled cult, willingly, with eyes blinded to the hypocricy and control, and wanting to believe it is "filled with love". I found my self blaming me for his return. I was dumbfounded. I eventually came to realize it was pressure from his JW mother, and depression caused by illnesses he now has that caused him to go back. The love bombing made him want to go back more. His JW father walked away as an elder in the mid to late 70's and never once returned to the KH.
The WT organization is an evil curse on a marriage with a non JW.
I have to agree with so many others here. I hope you got out.