F&cking elder #2 just called

by acsot 36 Replies latest jw friends

  • acsot
    acsot

    God d&mn I?m mad!

    The ?secretary? of the congregation just called. Apparently we didn?t have any time in for January, and seeing as how the C.O. is in town next week he had to get the report up to date. L Stupid jerk. (so for those of you just tuning in to my story, I haven?t been to a meeting for a year - my mother?s had two strokes and a heart attack and I?m caring for her. She?s been a dub for over 40 years.)

    I ran upstairs on the pretense of getting my report, but I didn?t want mum to know that?s what the idiot was calling for and start feeling guilty. So I invent some time for me, and a half hour for mum, just ?cause it?d break her heart to think she wasn?t being faithful to ?Jehovah?.

    All the while I?m thinking to myself: ?you callous jerk, this is the only time you bother to call, just to fill in your stupid paperwork.?

    So, after he gets our ?report?, I say:

    ?Too bad this is the only reason you call.?

    Silence. Then:

    ?Well, you?re in Elder A?s group (the one who called and had my mother in tears awhile back). And you?re never at the meetings.?

    Me: ?What? The meetings? You know what happened to my mother right??

    The Jerk: ?yeah?

    Me: ?You know don?t know you? A stroke. No, actually two strokes and a heart attack. I?ve been dealing with all this on my own and no help, no calls, no visits. And anyway, we?re not in Elder A?s group.?

    Now, being the gutless wimp that I am, I started to shake, my voice was about to start shaking so I shut up. There was silence. Not that it was due to his feeling guilty, I think by the tone of his voice he was just mad and trying not to lose it. I took a big gulp and said:

    ?You know, the indifference is really something.? That?s all I could manage before my voice started shaking again.

    Silence.

    Me: ?So that?s it, huh??

    The Jerk: ?Yeah?

    Me: ?Bye.?

    I hang up.

    I regret saying ?bye?, but I?m not at the point where I can burn all my bridges just yet so I didn?t want to just slam the phone down on him. I still need the few dubs who have been very helpful to sit with mum once in awhile so that I can get out. I?ve been able to make new friends but mum has only the dubs she knew before her stroke. Otherwise, I don?t know what I would have hurled at him.

    I also kind of regret saying we haven?t received any visits or calls, ?cause that?s the last thing I want! I can just see the dubs running to visit (all except for the elders) in order to take care of the elderly and infirm. The ones that help out are the only ones I want around, and then I?m not around, so it works out very well!

    I had wanted to say how passing the buck onto another elder wasn?t really Christian, and the very least he could have done was to ask how mum was doing, but no, not even that.

    I know mum will want to go to the Memorial but I may take her to our previous congregation. If I see The Jerk again I may say something that will get me DF?d and I don?t want to make it easy for them. One thing he did for me, however, and that was to guarantee I will never set foot in that KH again. I?ll visit another one if mum wants, once in a blue moon, but not this one.

    Freaking idiots.

    I?m glad you guys are here, I just needed to vent.

  • Winston Smith :>D
    Winston Smith :>D

    Wow ascot,

    I could 'feel' the emotions boiling over in just reading your phone conversation.

    Real Chritian folks, aren't they?

    If he was actually concerned or felt regret for not helping, he would of apologized and then offered to listen to how he could assist you and your mum.

    Pass the buck & never pay it forward. Always pay it to me!

    They got a power hungry god ruling over them, so I guess they have no love or compassion to spare, do they?

    (((ascot)))

  • Hyghlandyr
    Hyghlandyr

    Heck... now I kinda wished I had kept keepin time. That would be funny..
    all these years later to turn in time. Maybe I will get back in..then
    "move" someplace rural and send my time in directly to the society.

    So far as the other stuff...heck with that.

  • Bryan
    Bryan

    acsot,

    Sorry to hear. The witnesses always say there is so much love in the borg. I am new here so I haven't heard your whole story, although you did say you haven't to a meeting in a year. I'm suprised the dubs haven't taken on your mother to get her to the KH; at least to get her dollars.

    Hope you have a drink and cool down. Don't give them your energy!

    bryan

  • patio34
    patio34

    It's so hard to deal with stupid people who don't even own up to their stupidity. Isn't that stupid?!?

    It's really butting your head against the wall, isn't it. Gr-r-r-r-r.

    What jerks they are.

    I hope you feel better soon.

    Pat

  • kat2u
    kat2u

    Good for you!!!1Telling them what jerks they are being

    Im sorry your going thru such tough times.My thoughts are with you.

  • Scully
    Scully

    (((( acsot ))))

    I'm proud of you!!

    I just hope this doesn't get you set up for one of those "special" visits from the CO. But even if it does, what you said to Elder #2 can be said to the CO too.

    The stupid jerks. Don't they "get it" that they're ALL supposed to be Shepherds™?

    Love, Scully

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    I am proud of you to my love


    But I agree dont get DF just yet...You will need the help of the loving ones who care for your Mum when needed.

    If you DA/Df yourself they may not helpthinking it is JAHs will. .Count to ten sweetie & KNOW we all understand how you feel- most of us have been there done that ((((((((HUGS))))

  • DIM
    DIM

    good for you...that takes alot of guts....i know when i talk to my mom about stuff i start shaking and stuff too.....but the elders have never called us once in the 2 years since we left...our cards are still sitting in Willow Grove, PA while we are in Auburn, WA.

  • acsot
    acsot

    Thanks all! I know many have been through much worse, so I really can't complain. The way things have worked out so far have really been in my best interests, if you will. Not being harrassed, etc. I think this phone call was a jolt for me to start planning my next move in my fade. I mean "move" quite literally, not houses but congregations. At least to get my publisher card out of this one. Living in a major urban centre and speaking a few languages helps.

    I will say the same thing to the CO if he calls, but I don't think he will. I leave instructions with the health care providers not to let anyone in the house if I'm not there, and if I am home when they want to drop by, they ain't getting in the doorway.

    Shamus gave me a good idea awhile ago, "mum is under doctor's orders not to get stressed. Indifference and callousness are stressful. Good-bye!"

    I'll be complaining a lot about the lack of love to the dubs I still speak to, and most of them have their own horror stories to relate, so they'll be only too happy to hear of someone else's misery. It'll sort of lay the groundwork for my "move" to another congregation. Don't worry, I'm under no delusions that it's any different elsewhere, I'm just thinking six months down the road, where I want to be in my fade.

    You guys are the best! Mouthy and others: I don't know how you guys did it without a support group like this one, dealing with all the crap the Witchtower throws at you when you leave - or try to leave.

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