Dearest 'lang'... may you have peace!
No, this was just a sincere offer of thanks. I receive pretty bad treatment at H20, and the folks here have been quite accomodating. I wanted to speak my appreciation.
Kismet... have we met? Perhaps so. Either way, may you, too, have peace! I need to clarify a few things that you said... well, you AND COMF:
When I first came to H20, I posted under the name "Phoebe" for that is the name I am sometimes called by my Lord (no, it is not the name written on my forehead, for those who care...)
When I came, I did not know what to expect, for I had never been sent before. While many ridiculed me, a poll revealed that in actuality only two people had problems. Several did not. But I was frightened... and confused... over the response. I was not told that it would be that way. I completely understood how Jeremish felt. So, I left. But... I was told to go back, which I protested at first, and then asked leave to hide my identity. I was told to post, I THOUGHT, as 'a guest' and so posted simply under the 'guest' logon. I did not understand what I had heard on this until later.
After some time, OTHERS started referring to ME as 'LifesWaterFree' and other, er, spoofs on that name, and so, to identify myself, I just went with it. It was NOT a name I chose for myself, but one the BOARD chose for me. Since it worked for them, I used it.
After awhile, one of my spiritual brothers said that HE could not take what I was receiving from the Board... and posted that I would no longer be speaking there. In obedience to what he said HE heard... I obeyed. Partly because I had been taught such obedience by the Borg, and partly because more than ANYTHING, I did not want to stumble him. He truly could not take the hatred and animosity shown by some there, for he KNOWS me... and knows that I am not the kind of person many were making me out to be. (Some took it upon theirselves to get to know me personally, and know that what I am sent to speak is a bit different from my OWN personality).
After that, my Lord came to me and said I was to return to H20. I asked him about what my 'brother' had heard and posted. And my Lord reminded me of MY commission and that if there was ONE righteous person in that 'city', I must go back and speak to them. And so I did. I did not return as 'LifesWaterFree', because for SOME reason, folks started lumping other folks under that name. JUSTAMOM, is Kim. FINALCALL, is Donny. They SAY who they are. And yes, I know them... quite well... as I know many OTHERS who post, too. And some who just 'lurk'. Because of the misidentification of others with 'LifesWaterFree', I chose NOT to use that name.
What name would I use? I asked on it and kept hearing 'a guest', 'post as 'a guest'. But I couldn't DO that, as I had been warned by the Board that it would not be acceptable to keep using the 'guest' logon. So, I KEPT asking what was meant until my Lord directed me to Psalm 15:1. It was THEN that I understood that I was approved to be 'a guest' in the 'tent' of my Father... and that my COMMISSION... was to 'invite' OTHERS to be 'guests' as well. And so, I started posting under 'AGuest'.
This caused MORE animosity, false accusations and finally a LIE against me directly (including a vulgar reference to blowjobs by Mr. COMF - hey, I'm 41 and I can say 'blowjob'... I know what one is...), that I returned to my Lord and asked what to do. And I heard my Lord say to me, 'Simply tell them WHO you are. Tell them all about yourself... what have you to hide? Are you ashamed of me and the work I have given you to do?" And I was not. So, on the Board, I told my name, address, age, race, sex, familial status, and even confessed my sins. A couple of folks called Mr. COMF to task on his vulgarity; they were shocked that he went to such depth, and the Board did nothing. But I 'handled' him myself, and it we have been at odds, I guess, ever since. We normally don't even address each other, other than when he has some snide, vulgar, sneaky remark to make, which he COWARDLY does under other logons. This is the FIRST time in some time that he has addressed me as himself.
Now, I sign my posts "SJ", which stands for "Shelby Johnson", my true name and identity. I have nothing to hide, and I don't care anymore about the ridicule. I have asked for and received 'a forehead hard as flint'. Believe me, I USED to cry over these things, but not anymore. There are too many who DO wish to 'hear' the good news of my Lord and the free gift of holy spirit, for me to let the few that don't get to me. And my 'rewards' are GREAT! The things I am permitted to see, simply because I obeyed and went to 'work' in the 'field' of my Lord... I cannot put a price on. Ridicule is too small a consequence for me to worry.
I have not been 'sent' here to JW.com, as I was to H20. I was LITERALLY sent there. I am here because I felt welcomed, if not entirely agreed with, and as my Lord said, "When they persecute in ONE city, flee to another." And so, I did. Of course, I appears that I have the same 'ridiculer' here, as I had at the beginning there.
He seems to be a man who has difficulty speaking truth... or anything of substance... unless it glorifies his 'intelligence'. I am not intelligent per say, so I have to speak what someone else GIVES me. I am, however, as honest as I can be, and speak from my heart. Always. For 'out of the hearts ABUNDANCE, the mouth speaks.' Apparently, there's a LOT of stuff... in my heart. And I cannot contain it there. Sorry, but I simply cannot hold it. My heart would burst.
I find it intriguing, though, that the things I say, even in the way of offering sincere thanks or apology makes that one... and perhaps you, too, SO uncomfortable. Apparently, these are things that he simply CAN'T receive. I wonder who robbed him of his ability to FEEL... and express himself from HIS heart? But, I UNDERSTAND it, for one cannot express from the heart what one does not POSSESS in his heart... and particularly if one does not HAVE a heart.
Most of the people here, and on places like H20, and indeed, in the world, feel discomfort at pure, UNADULTERATED, truth. They consider it corny, mushy, grandstanding, and egoism. They WOULD. For they are the same ones that roll their eyes at any expression of emotion. And no wonder: the WTBTS does not teach such things. So much of what they say is built on LIES and a LACK of love and emotion, they are 'crippled'... and turn out 'cripples'. Some of us 'heal', however, and learn to speak the truth to one another.
So, that is the TRUTH of the matter in a 'nutshell'. If you have a personal problem with me, please, feel free to express it. If you have a problem with what I SAY... express that, too. I will respond, if I can. But I will always bid you peace, as long as you receive such peace. If not, I will ask that my peace return to me.
Which is what occurred with you, right, Mr. COMF? And I am flattered that you have 'condescended' to even ADDRESSING me. What, you're not wearing your asbestos chonies? Perhaps you think your 'status' has changed. It has not; however, love does not keep account of the injury, so any ill-will that you have borne me, has already been forgiven. That which you bore against the Holy Spirit, however... well, do we really NEED to go there again? A 'speedo' will not 'cover' you, Captain.
So, do me a favor... be nice... or be nasty. Don't try to be both. It doesn't 'become' you. Personally, I would rather that you didn't address me at all, so that I would not be forced to even acknowledge you. I know that you don't 'see' things as I do. However, I grant YOU the freedom to say what you wish. I do not wish to do 'battle' with you... but I am certainly not 'above' it. And you know it. For all I need do is patiently wait, and you WILL again... 'sin with your mouth'. My suggestion? You keep it closed before you do.
Peace to you 'lang' and 'Kismet'...
A slave of Christ,
SJ