DON ADAMS BIOGRAPHY

by bj 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • bj
    bj

    What do you know about the new President of the WTS, Don Adams? (All anecdotes needed)

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    Maximus is da man for dat stuff! He knew Don Adams and his brother. He knew everyone! He even met Paul personally and deleted him as an elder for spreading blasphemy.

    You see, Maximus is an avatar (look it up). He was sent by the Divinity to keep an eye out for jerks and in that position gained prominence and special powers. He had to learn Latin because some of those ancient Romans actually SPOKE it. During his long and productive life he also learned music. That kept him sane while being in the company of insane humans.

    In his earlier days as a run-of-the-mill Elder, he told his CO Moses NOT to strike that rock, but Moses was a typical CO and did whateverinthehell he wanted to do. Moses struck the rock and later croaked as a result. Joshua was made DO and Maximus was made CO. That's the way that stuff works in TheocracyLand.

    Maximus was never mentioned in the scriptures because scriptures HATE avatars. Avatars mess up the neat little message that scriptures want to convey to those who read them.

    Fast forward to Jesus, another avatar. Jesus said to Maximus, "I'm the son of the living God." Maximus replied, "Well you certainly cannot be the son of some DEAD God, you big dummy." Jesus was pissed and Maximus was DFd. That's why none of the gospels mentioned him. The writings of Maximus were expurgated long before the Council of Nicea.

    Fast forward to Nate Knorr: Maximus was assigned to work with him and Fred Franz. Knorr was well-known as an especially humble and gracious man who extended kindness to all around him and Maximus knew that that story was the biggest pile of shit ever to emerge from the Watchtower Bethel Compound. Max (may I call you "Max", Maximus?) approached Nate and Fred and said, "this pink book you are about to release at the "Divine Will Assembly" is really awful. Knorr said "well, fix it then. But keep in the part about their eyes melting in their sockets while they are still standing. I like that part." Franz said "Babylon the Grape Has Fallen!" Max sighed and went about his work fixing up that book to make it a littler pile of shit that it was when he took over the job. He would have taken ALL the shit out of that book, but the WTS is run by committee, and avatar or no avatar committee decide everything. Camels were created because a committee was chosen to design a horse. But that's another story.

    Fast forward to 2001. Max is here with us! The avatar who still remembers his Latin from nearly 2,000 years ago! Welcome him. I certainly do.

    Max is da man!

    Farkel
    Non-Avatar Class, but still "shakin' the bush, boss."

  • Prisca
    Prisca

    darn, I thought this thread was about the guy from Get Smart

    [8>]

    (well, SOMEONE had to make that reference! just getting in first!)

  • AcapulcoGold
    AcapulcoGold

    doesn't change the reality that you were dumb enough to become a witness farkel - hence equal to, if not less than those you so "angrily" denounce - your loudmouthing does not impress me though it may have the desired effect on the less discriminating - ie. yourself.

    enjoy your delusion, it's obviously all you've got to hold onto.

    AG

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    Hi Troll,

    : doesn't change the reality that you were dumb enough to become a witness farkel - hence equal to, if not less than those you so "angrily" denounce - your loudmouthing does not impress me though it may have the desired effect on the less discriminating - ie. yourself.

    Yep that was my fatal mistake. I made that fatal mistake at the age of two and was given no other choice as long as I lived under the direction of my parents, who (accidentally) also put food in my belly and a roof over my head.

    I am so sorry I made that mistake, but have a heart. I was only two years old.

    Farkel

  • Flip
    Flip
    …doesn't change the reality that you were dumb enough to become a witness…enjoy your delusion

    It wasn’t my delusion…it was my parents who held all the cards, of which the WTBTS is well aware and uses it to the corporations full advantage.

    Flip

  • bj
    bj

    Can you please stick to the topic and contribute something that we can all learn from instead of a lot of nonesense. Thank you!

  • outnfree
    outnfree

    Lol, Prisca (ME, too!)

    Farkel -- Another brilliant piece of writing. Just the thing to wake up to to remind me why I love coming here.

    bj,
    Sorry that everyone got off-topic here. I know absolutely nothing about Don Adams except what those October press releases said. But I think you are wrong that we haven't learned anything:

    Prisca is old enough to have watched GET SMART!
    And Farkel just gave us posters some insight into Maximus in a very clever way!

    outnfree

  • Francois
    Francois

    You tell 'em bj.

    I'd like to know more about Don Adams, too. If this guy impresses the Big Fark, he must have something on the ball.

    More, more, more.

    F

  • thinkers wife
    thinkers wife

    Gosh,
    Do I feel like a mushroom!!! I didn't even know who the new president was. Is this Don Adams one of the annoited? How old is he.
    The name is familiar, but I know nothing about him.
    TW

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