This is for all JW's out there...

by Divergent 27 Replies latest jw friends

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  tornapart

  Dubstepped:- Couldn't the OP just as easily read:

  To all the battered wives out there, if you allow your weak azz to stay in a marriage with a spouse that beats the crap out of you, you get what you deserve. It's your choice to stay so you deserve the consequences of your pathetic choices.

  Victim blaming is sooooo cool. Compassion is so overrated. Smdh

  
  

  I've just this morning finished reading a book about a woman in an abusive marriage and found it eye opening. The way someone can be totally trapped and be unable to see any way out. The similarities between being trapped in a cult and trapped in an emotionally abusive relationship were so easy to see. Even though we are not physically abused as in this woman's case, the emotional abuse and control, leading to a person's complete domination is all the same. You end up believing everything you are told by the abuser and have no way of escaping. Your post is spot on dubstepped.
• 

  Bonsai

  It's a bit rough, but I understand the message that you are trying to convey. So many times I've wanted to tell friends and family who are trapped and unhappy to wake the **** up, take control of your life and do something about your unhappiness. They complain and complain about all aspects of the organization, the injustice in the congregation and yet do nothing about it.

  I have a friend still in, who only contacts me to complain, because he knows I'm the only one he can fully rant to. After his rant session he goes right back into full cult mode. What the heck! So frustrating.
  
• 

  TTWSYF

  Divergent-Good for you to speak your mind and defend your position. I had come to this board with similar feelings regarding these people who believe that 'lying for the TRUTH' is acceptable. I mean who could think such a thing would be alright? What I found out is that these issues are more complicated than that.

  just saying
• 

  Divergent

  Thanks for all the comments. Instead of getting into a debate, I'm just going to state the objective of this thread in a single sentence:

  The objective is to get people to think: "I DON'T deserve it!" and actually do something about it. That's all
  
• 

  Vidiot
• 

  steve2

  Being blunt works most effectively in the context of understanding the person who feels trapped. We tend to minimize the huge hold that social disapproval has on all of us. Besides, "arguments" against something do not necessarily help trapped people feel able and/or confident enough to make a move. For some, "better the devil you know" is the safer option in the meantime.

  Moreover, in many cases , leaving is a process achieved in self-directed stages, not a one step decision. Leaving for one person may entail something different than it does for another.

  Good old fashioned fear holds people back - fear of trying to make it alone should all of one's most important supports become rejecting of one.

  There is more thsn a grain of truth in the OP but it tends to simplify the monumental difficulties faced by people trying to find solutions to what appear to be complicated situations.

  I think also some of the comments about women remaining in abusive relstionships betray a startling ignorance of "Batttered Woman's Syndrome".
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  Mad Irishman

  You sound like a Jehovah's Witness.
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  Dummheit

  Unfortunately, most people are quite happy and fulfilled in the early stages of their involvement in any cult (otherwise cults wouldn't exist). Cults try to shower newcomers with attention and positive reinforcement which draws people deeper into the organization. By the time alarm bells start ringing for many people, they have invested a great portion of their lives in the cult and acting on that cognitive dissonance now carries a great cost--one's relationships (familial and personal), work situation sometimes and a fear of the unknown. It is understandable that some people just stuff all the doubt back in and try to carry on best as possible. I feel sympathy for those who are going through the struggle to break free from the drudgery of JW slavery.
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  Divergent

  You sound like a Jehovah's Witness

  Would a witness tell others to wake up & leave the cult???
• 

  OrphanCrow

  Divergent: Sorry to be so blunt, but you only have yourself to blame if you realize something is wrong butallow your cognitive dissonance to kick in. If you are confronted with facts which are reported by reliable sources which are hard to dispute and deny, and you choose to dismiss these as "apostate lies" rather than looking at these from an objective point of view, it's your fault and you deserve the consequences of willful ignorance!

  Sorry to be so blunt, Divergent, but YOU are part of the problem.

  Adopting a "blame the victim" attitude is not going to help anybody but yourself. Your post reveals that you have no understanding of the factors that are at play in 1.) a cult and 2.) an abusive relationship.

  If you are interested in expanding your knowledge base, it would be good for you to spend some time researching the power dynamics in both 1.) cults and 2.)abusive relationships. I would suggest that you start with investigating the "Stockholm Syndrome".

  Developing a critical mind is one thing, but being critical from ignorance is quite another, Divergent. You need to apply your own advice to youself. Educate yourself. Ignorance is unattractive.