by dura-luxe 26 Replies latest jw friends
((((((((dura-luxe)))))))
I realize the anger & hurt being brought up a Jw can cause. I don't know the background, so I'm not going to be critical at all. If I were to publish some of the abuse I went through at my family's hands, I would'nt necessarily feel bad, as THEY were the ones who did the abuse. I mwould've merely written about it. Also, I've done alot of theater. I am interested in performance art. PM your blog if you want.
Seems like there is a lot of pain in your mothers response. I don't know your relationship, but if I became aware of negative feelings my daughter had toward me (as well as seeing things I considered personal and private) via an online blog I would be extremely hurt and probably angry too....
I would suggest some intense communication and perhaps a bit of empathy.
Just my 2 cents based on what I read.
You've been on your own since 18, what's the problem? I don't know if your mom is/was demanding as my mom, but I laid it on the line with her, and that was it. She's been very silent about my life since. Your mom needs to recognize that your an adult and you have a life to lead.
Guest 77
What I was getting at was that I knew that I would have to stop talking to my mother at some point as she is getting more and more JW crazy. Now is that point.
But continue to pick on the blog and say that I owe my non-existent family an apology. You're right. We should all hide the past and pretend it never happened, less someone be embarassed of the truth. In fact, this website shouldn't exist and none of us should ever complain about the childhood we lost because, well, our parents MEANT well, didn't they?
I won't be back to read the rest of your responses, but thanks to the couple of people who did understand. I appreciate it.
My "worldly" friends have been a lot more sympathetic than you guys. Frankly, I'm surprised.
best,
dura-luxe
welcome dura-luxe
I became a dub at age 24 and resigned 25 yrs later, so my children were raised in the "borg". I have apologized to them for the abuse theysuffered during those years (not being allowed to celebrate holidays, forced to sit through hours of boring meetings and assemblies, and all that goes with being a dub). However, I would probably be very hurt, as your mother was, to find a blog posted for all the world to see.
As amac said, your parents did what they thought was right, I know I did, thinking it was the way to gain life for my children. It is very freeing to understand that your parents did the best they could, considering their beliefs and circumstances. When I realized that, at about age 19, I was able to forgive my parents for their mistakes. I think that my children have also been able to forgive me for my mistakes. Fortunately for us, we are free from the borg, which is not your situation.
Aunthill
Well put Aunthill....
In fact, this website shouldn't exist and none of us should ever complain about the childhood we lost because, well, our parents MEANT well, didn't they?
Actually you are right, you should bitch and moan about your lost childhood and make your parents feel like shit. You'll feel SOOOO good about yourself too!
If you ever you have children, I hope they blame you for all your mistakes just as much as you blame your parents.
Hey Silent Lambs - when dad was raping you, it's just cuz' he had you're best interests at heart! Keep it quiet and forget about it. And if you've never been a parent you don't understand SMILEY FACE SMILEY FACE !!
I love it when the witness's saids if you dont join us , you wont survive armageddon. I love it cause it does not make any sense. How would they know whos gonna survive or not. That's just one of things that is keeping me away from joining with them. But other then that they are nice people, little confused at times but cool.
And if you've never been a parent you don't understand
It's true. The old saying, don't judge another person until you've walked a mile in his shoes still stands. However, in raising children, I would say, don't judge until you've walked about 25 years in my shoes. That gives you plenty of perspective.
I understand you are angry, you want the perfect mom and dad we all wanted. Unfortunately, they don't exist. Maybe therapy would help you to confront your anger?
Hey Silent Lambs - when dad was raping you, it's just cuz' he had you're best interests at heart! Keep it quiet and forget about it. And if you've never been a parent you don't understand SMILEY FACE SMILEY FACE !!
That was terribly uncalled for not and not what anyone here said. Jackie
