One thing I am now pretty convinced of about religion or mystics is that it is often related to what Freud called Todestrieb (death drive, or drive to death?): it is apparent in Christianity from Paul's "theology of the cross", which implies "dying to one's desire" (an exemplary expression of it could be Galatians 5:24, "those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires"). But it certainly has correspondence elsewhere (such as the "non-being" goal in Taoism or Buddhism).
In the JWs' doctrine, despite all claims to the contrary, death is omnipresent from the penalty of sin in Eden down to Armaggedon (as "tipyfied" by the Flood, the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, etc.), with the necessary "ransom sacrifice" of Jesus at the midst of the picture. Practically, it implies every kind of "sacrifice": what God expects from you is exactly what you don't feel like. The strange thing is that this call to sacrifice is just what appeals to the religious mind.
When you were a JW, did you feel attracted to this kind of "sacrifice", where the most unpleasant thing (such as going from door to door, becoming a pioneer or a Bethel member) just appeared to you what God wanted you to do, especially if you didn't "desire" it? If so, how do you cope now with this kind of feeling? Has it disappeared altogether, does it express itself in other ways (as "sacrifices" to another cause), or do you repress it to lead a "normal" life?