Thinking of the kids at Christmas (page 3)

franklin J

yes, I remember all too well being the only kid in the class to have to go to the library during a Christmas party and having to excuse myself in a class grab bag of contributed presents . The pain and humiliation stays with a child of having to be different. I have overlooked and forgiven much in the turbulent wake of my JW childhood, but I cannot forgive the anguish of having to be "different" in school, among my peers..

And now, at 47 years old, with my own 3 wonderful children ( who will never know that pain) I still think back 40 years ago and--the sting is still there! 2 years of therapy and deprogramming could not clear it away. Despite whatever success I have achieved over the passed 20 years ( my 3 kids being my proudest --achievment? accomplishment?...my wife helped) I suppose I am still that small boy still uncomfortably explaining to the teacher that it is against my religion....and knowing that I would then have to face the class as the " one who could not go to the christmas party".

Special K---I related to your effort to help those little charges who came to you in Library to sit out the Xmas concert. You have brought happiness and comfort to those little souls, I am sure. The elementary school child trapped in my psyche thanks you! ( weird, I know!) I hope this holiday brings you much joy!

Frank

Princess

As for my kids, it breaks my heart to remember all the things they missed out on. I just can't dwell on it.

You know, I just don't think about it that way. It wasn't really that big of a deal to me. I was different, I accepted that and dealt with it. Like I said earlier, I hated the days after Christmas more than anything, when everyone was showing off their new stuff.

If I had not been raised a JW, I would not have met Steve. I would not have my kids. I'm grateful for what I have and I refuse to dwell on what I missed out on. It's nothing compared to what I've gained.

franklin J

Princess,

You are right. I have much to be thankful for, and despite that early turbulence, there is much joy in my life.

Thank you for the jolt. A positive attitude CAN be infectious!

regards,

Frank

Angharad

If I had not been raised a JW, I would not have met Steve. I would not have my kids. I'm grateful for what I have and I refuse to dwell on what I missed out on. It's nothing compared to what I've gained.

Excellent point Princess. I agree.

Although it was hard sometimes, I dont personally regret what I missed out on I just feel bad when I see other kids like the boy in Liam's class going through it now, because I remember how it felt being in that situation when I was a kid and sometimes not fully understanding the reasons behind it all.

Joyzabel

*sigh*

just when I think I'm getting over this JW thing, you bring up a topic like this and very graciously think of the JW kids that are suffering and don't know it.

I sit here with tears streaming down my cheecks thinking how my kids have missed out. Me, I'm too old to lament over my wasted childhood walking home from school early while others had parties. I guess there will always be a part of me that will hurt when recalled memories of the past come up.

Thank you Angharad for showing how great it is to think of others and pity them. Maybe someday those pittiful people will wake up.

Hugs,

j2bf

safe4kids

Hey (((((Harry))))) Nice post, but I've come to expect that of you

I feel sad for the little witness guy in my neighborhood, too. It makes me remember what it was like growing up a dub kid. I'm so incredibly glad that my kids don't have to suffer like most of us here did. I'm also learning, though, that it's not just witness kids that have it bad this time of year...for some families already battling dysfunction of one kind or another, this is a very stressful season for them, and especially the children. It should be a magical time for kids but unfortunately for some it isn't. So remember folks, when you see the Angel trees or holiday meal packages, et cetera, while you're out shopping, remember that buying a gift or making some type of donation can make all the difference in the lives of kids who aren't able to be home with their families right now or whose parents can't afford to give them something special.

Dana

starfish422

My sadness about Christmas isn't so much for myself, it's for a lack of understanding of how my parents could stand to do this to us. If I had to tell my son that we couldn't celebrate Christmas, it would literally break my heart. I don't know how my mom and dad justified telling my oldest brother, who was five when they stopped celebrating, that they simply weren't going to have Christmas any longer.

I'm also astounded that they didn't seem to have any compassion at all for me, a small child, where it concerned my disappointment at not being able to celebrate Christmas. As though I, at 3 or 4 or even 9 or 10 years old, should feel joy at being "separate from the world" and should gladly keep myself away from the Christmas celebrations at school and so on. It was as if they honestly didn't understand why, when they gave me the reasons we didn't celebrate, I didn't jump up and sing Hallelujah or something.

Nosferatu

Haven't read all the comments yet, but yes, hugs to all the lonely JW kids.

It wasn't all bad, I was able to miss a lot of school during Christmas time, but still, there was the feeling of being singled out. I remember when all the other kids would be doing Xmas crafts, and the teacher would make alternatives for me to do. For example, when all the kids were doing Xmas trees out of construction paper, the teacher would say "well, you can make a regular tree".

One thing I wasn't incredibly happy about was my interest in music being surpressed. My mother hated the music teacher because she was of a different religion. The music teacher saw my interest in music and was always arguing with my mother. I wanted to join the choir, but my mother wouldn't let me because of the holiday songs that would be involved during Xmas time.

However there were a few years where I wasn't the only one. There was another JW my age and I was often put in the same class as her.

Mulan

remember that buying a gift or making some type of donation can make all the difference in the lives of kids who aren't able to be home with their families right now or whose parents can't afford to give them something special.

Hi Dana, I contributed to the leukemia foundation, to provide a Christmas gift basket for the kids at Children's hospital here in Seattle. $25 provides one basket for a child. I do it every year.

Also, lots of the stores around town have huge boxes to donate toys. You giftwrap them, and write on it whether it is for a boy or a girl and an age range. I did that too. Just a few dollars here and there can help lots of kids who wouldn't have much of a Christmas without it.

Angharad

(((((Joy)))))

Dont be sad, this is one of the reasons I was in two minds about whether to post this, I really didnt want anyone to feel bad for the choices they made with their kids. I personally do not blame my parents at all, they have always had and still do have the best of intentions for me and my childhood was happy and I dont regret how things were at all. Its just school sucked at this time of year, and I feel bad when I see kids going through it now, I think more so because we have left and now know what we know. (That last bit sounded like Rumsfeld speak )

So remember folks, when you see the Angel trees or holiday meal packages, et cetera, while you're out shopping, remember that buying a gift or making some type of donation can make all the difference in the lives of kids who aren't able to be home with their families right now or whose parents can't afford to give them something special

Great point Dana.

Thinking of the kids at Christmas

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