my heart hurts.

by flower 54 Replies latest jw experiences

  • flower
    flower

    Can I just say something here? .......

    You people rock! I hope that you have peeked in on this thread Nickey. I was feeling like crap after I talked to my sister yesterday but today I am back to being determined to recover from the stupidity that was my life.

    I cant thank you all enough for letting me vent and for all your kind words of support. I wish I could reply to each post separately but there are just too many! Thank you thank you thank you! For helping me feel better today.

    I have my life plan in the works right now and have gained new ideas from your posts as well, even you Grace..although you know I wont say another prayer again in my life, I still LOVE you to death.

    For those who could relate to my feelings I am so sorry (((((((hugs)))))))). Least we got each other right?

    anyway....ya'll rock!

  • Outaservice
    Outaservice

    Remember the night I scared you to death? LOL

    Well, I guess if you're never going to pray again, some of us will have to pray in your behalf!

    E-mail me with your mailing address as I would like to send your son a Christmas present.

    Outaservice

    PS Take up Mouthy's offer for a visit, she's a great cook and very hospitable.

  • flower
    flower

    LOL Yes I remember...that was so long ago!

    Awww you are so sweet to think of my son! Did I ever properly thank you for all the stuff you sent me when I first came round here?

    THanks YOU!

  • Outaservice
  • bebu
    bebu
    What I have done is try to make friends with my neighbors. Even that was hard because for so long, I didn't do things with the neighbors, but slowly, after inviting the neighbor-girl over for movies, she became a friend. Then another neighbor got a lovely wife and we became friends. Then I moved into a new neighborhood! Starting over again.

    Well, I go for walks with my daughter. Play in the front yard with her and see the other neighbors. Wave at people when they drive by. Go to people's house when invited even when I'd rather stay home. It takes effort but slowly I am making friends.

    You have such a great attitude, Sally! You are a great neighbor and friend, I'm sure.

    I've found that whenever we've moved, that there is someone really interesting but SHY nearby. Taking the initiative and inviting someone over for coffee has led to some of my most cherished friendships. I recommend this approach, too.

    (((Flower)))

    Sorry you have had to deal with immature people at work, and a slap from your sister. You will find people who love the things you do; I think you've already met many of them here. I'm so glad you are feeling better already.

    Have a great day today!

    bebu

  • Redneckgurl
    Redneckgurl

    Flower,

    It's good to hear you are feeling better, that we were able to pull you up on your tosies again! I am sure I will be where you were the other day, feeling pretty crappy about my life and and to see that I will have somewhere to go and be given kind words is awesome!

    As I am on here longer, I hope to get to know you all better.

    Redneckgurl

  • outnfree
    outnfree

    I am so pleased that by the time I got here to hug your achin' heart, so many others already had, and you were already feeling better for having vented!

    It IS tough to make friends now that we've left the cult. We are all so determined not to be so small-minded and petty as we were as JWs. And yes, ignoring office gossip does make one out to be either unfriendly or snobby. But I have found that people appreciate the fact that you're never taking sides, and after a while co-workers will become confident that their confidences are safe with you, and your relationships can move on to a different plane. It takes time, though.

    The hurt of shunning just doesn't quit, does it? I am blessed to have found some nice people at the ex-jw meetups, and we are slowly developing one on one friendships. This afternoon we will be sharing tea. Next week I have a lunch date with a woman who cannot attend today's tea, and who is going to share her artistic talent with me. Then, I am blessed that Rhonda/pettygrudger is willing to let me and another friend of ours share her hotel room, because I couldn't afford the trip to Toronto for the fest without it.

    You are right, flower, people here ROCK!!! And that includes you! I'm glad you're feeling happier.

    outnfree

  • Aztec
    Aztec

    (((Flower)))

    Your username is apt! I know we haven't always gotten along perfectly but, I know how you feel. What helps me, especially at this time of year, is listening to upbeat music and talking on the phone with people that care about me. Take good care of yourself, you're no use to anyone if you haven't put the time into making sure that YOU are okay. I wish you much love and happiness!

    ~Aztec

  • CruithneLaLuna
    CruithneLaLuna

    I didn't read everyone's reply, nor did I count, but I see that a lot of folks responded with fellow-feeling. Unfortunately, there isn't a lot in life that's "easy," including making friends ... but there are fantastic opportunities of all kinds that pass by us everyday, near enough that we could grasp them if we would only believe they're there and open ourselves to them. I not only hold that as a "metaphysical" belief, I've experienced the reality of it to an extent. (I know that for every opportunity that has landed in my lap unexpectedly, there must be ten or a hundred out there that I've remained completely unaware of.) "Keep on seeking [with an optimistic, enthusiastic attitude] and you will find." It's hard to be all cheerful and expectant when you're NOT getting what you want, but know that it's out there (because it is), and go find it.

    Cruithne

  • SheilaM
    SheilaM

    Flower I am sorry about what your going thru. You have a PM sweetie

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