Personal Goals......

by flower 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • nobody told me
    nobody told me

    The first 42 are all good reasons never to go back. Thanks for reminding me of what I used to be enslaved to.

  • Stacy Smith
    Stacy Smith

    I couldn't find the goal where I finish college, get a good job and don't have to rely on anyone to support myself. Did I read over it too fast?

  • freedom96

    If someone were to work on that list, it leaves no time to do anything, much less go to college, or to support oneself.

  • czarofmischief


    (1) Help one (1) person out of the truth.

    (2) Form a committee to help dubs recycle their old magazines as birdcage liners, firestarters, and toilet paper.

    (3) Hack WT website redirecting all "hits" to pornographic site.

    (4) Set up Sister Slut's website, dedicated to fulfilling all those naughty dub fantasies like "Backdoor Witnessing" and "Two at the Door, Three on the Floor" and "Fleece of the Sheep" and "The 'bate Crowd" and "Pimping Overseer" and "What Sister Sally Saw" and "JC Sausage Party".

    (5) Become the "False Prophet" of Revelation fame.

    (6) Compile all of JCanon's writings into a handy-dandy reference that can easily fit into most SUV's.

    (7) Start a rumor that the UN is moving its headquarters across the East River into the Brooklyn office buildings of the WT, thus fulfilling the prophecy of the disgusting thing standing in a holy place, and all the Witnesses will have to "flee to the mountains" or carefully measure their elevation in feet above sea level and never come down below a "generally Biblically acceptable standard" of what constitutes a "mountain" or a "mountainous elevation" set by the Society as being 14,000 feet.

    (8) Walk around behind Ted Jaracz repeating everything he says in a voice like Linda Blair's in the Exorcist.

    (9) Smurf-a-palooza at the next District Convention.

    (10) Seduce a CO's wife. Bonus points if she's married to a GB member. Receive a medal for your efforts from his majesty the Czar of Mischief. If you are Stacy Smith, you get a medal anyway.

  • MrMoe
    Become a more submissive wife, showing more respect.

    Flower is right, this one makes me sick, too Sicker thing is, I and lots of others used to be that way

  • Stacy Smith
    Stacy Smith

    Submissive wife? I glossed right over that one.

    What kind of wimp would want to marry a submissive woman?

  • JeffT

    God, that list was depressing. He could have listed goal one as "sell my soul to a publishing corporation and let them tell me everything else" and been done with it.

  • flower

    LOL thats good stuff Czarofmischief...

    Whats does one get for seducing a CO? I might need to make out a new list of goals

  • DanTheMan

    I can't stop doing this lately, it all just jumps off the screen when I see towerspeak, either directly from the source or elsewhere, it's so sad how thoroughly WT has burned certain words and phrases into dub minds:

    Become more regular...Improve preparation...regular...Improve...Improve...Improve...Improve...doing more...Become more...Make more...regularly....Strive...Keep up...Read more...Read more...Do more...Send more...Qualify for greater responsibility...Show more...Fellowship more...Make more...Become more......applying Bible principles...Cultivate more...Pray more...draw closer...Become a more...Become a more...Become a more...Reduce time spent...Spend more time...
  • iiz2cool

    I like these goals better than the society's.

    My Personal Goals to Pursue
    (1 Walter 4:15)


    [ ] 1. Become more regular in apostafest attendance.
    [ ] 2. Come to X-JW meetups earlier.
    [ ] 3. Comment at each X-JW meetup.
    [ ] 4. Improve preparation for de-witnessing activity.
    [ ] 5. Enroll in a college course.
    [ ] 6. Prepare daily posts for JWD.
    [ ] 7. Become a regular apostate by posting on JWD each day.
    [ ] 8. Eliminate field service
    [ ] 9. Improve de-witnessing activity (make 6 posts a day on JWD.)
    [ ] 10. Improve de-witnessing activity (make 10 posts a day on JWD.)
    [ ] 11. Improve de-witnessing activity (make 40 posts a day on JWD.)
    [ ] 12. De-convert a pioneer.
    [ ] 13. Reach out for the office of Overbeer
    [ ] 14. Burn your watchtower magazines.
    [ ] 15. Burn your awake magazines.
    [ ] 16. Do more to work on and keep the kingdom hall defaced.
    [ ] 17. Divert financial contributions to the kingdom hall and send them to funds for victims of abuse.
    [ ] 18. Send more financial contributions directly to me.
    [ ] 19. Drink with the District Overbeer on his next visit.
    [ ] 20. Get better acquainted with the moderators.
    [ ] 21. Get better acquainted with new apostates.
    [ ] 22. Show more hospitality by inviting other apostates over for beers.
    [ ] 23. Fellowship more with apostates at all times.
    [ ] 24. Visit and help the sick and elderly apostates.
    [ ] 25. Make more tavern visits.
    [ ] 26. Become less interested in applying Bible principles.
    [ ] 27. Cultivate more fruitage of spirits in my personality.
    [ ] 28. Increase gossip and idle talk in my life.
    [ ] 29. Pray less and rely on yourself to get things done.
    [ ] 30. Become a more sexy partner, giving better head.
    [ ] 31. Increase time spent on the computer.
    [ ] 32. Increase time spent watching television.
    [ ] 33. Spend more involved in sexual activity.
    [ ] 34. Spend more time reading pornographic literature.
    [ ] 35. Other:____________________________________________________
    [ ] _____________________________________________________________
    [ ] _____________________________________________________________
    [ ] _____________________________________________________________
    [ ] _____________________________________________________________

Share this