Can we talk confidentially?

by wheelwithinwheel 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • wheelwithinwheel
    wheelwithinwheel

    The Lot video shows what most elder’s offices are like. Actually it a pretty well-equipped one and with the video context is, without a doubt, org-approved.



    But let’s face it. There’s a big problem. Any discussion in this office is not confidential.


    This family is well off compared to what ours was. My elder dad would just pull the telephone cord into our hall closet. I think we would have felt it was sinful to glue our ears to the paper-thin closet door but we didn’t have to worry about it. We overheard most of the conversation as if we were in the same room with the elders. Our whole family knew pretty much everything going on in the congregation, or at least all that was discussed in my dad’s ‘office’.

    I remember being quite traumatized when I once overheard dad delivering a 6 month committee’s menace to the father of 2 very young girls who I considered my friends. The family had immigrated to Canada and bought a bakery. Dad’s conversation indicated they had been reported to have sold cakes decorated with pagan icing and chocolate Santa Claus’. The committee was giving them 6 months to sell. It was the reasonable and loving thing to do. They were already missing a lot of meetings just to keep the bakery going. Now they missed even more. I worried as the clock ticked. The family didn’t sell. The reason isn’t clear. It wasn’t discussed in dad’s ‘office’. Perhaps there were no buyers. Probably it was their only income. The mom and dad were disfellowshipped. The family stopped attending the Hall all together. I felt really bad but asked Jehovah to help me harden my heart against the wicked.

    The lesson, which I’ve shared over the years…refuse to discuss anything you don’t want overheard and repeated over the phone… and don’t meet in an elder’s ‘office’.

  • cha ching
    cha ching

    Very smart, wheelwithinawheel..... I do not think you are alone in your 'ventures' ;-)

  • stuckinarut2
    stuckinarut2

    Confidentiality amongst Elders? Hahahahahaha........

    Elders and their families are often the biggest cause of unbridled gossip.

    Sister elder finds out something, and says to her friend while out in service "shh... I shouldn't say anything, BUT because you're a good friend, I can share this...."

    yep...that's how it goes....

  • dogon
    dogon

    I doubt a third of elders did not mouth off to their wife's and others about confidential shit. You can not trust these assholes as far as you can spit.

  • millie210
    millie210

    I remember once when a big case was "going down" in our Hall when I was growing up.

    One of the elders involved had (among other children) a handicapped son with cerebral palsy and learning disabilities who had been in a wheel chair his whole life.

    This was a very loved young person and one was never sure what he really comprehended and what he didnt...

    the night of the big shocking announcement, this boys father went on stage to begin making the announcement. Meanwhile in the audience, the handicapped young man (at this point in his 20's) turned most all the way around in his wheel chair in order to better watch the family this this impending announcement was going to be about.

    All other eyes were on the "and now we have a special announcement by Br. ________."

    Not that young man! He wanted to see the reaction of the family TO the announcement.

    Draw your own conclusions.

  • steve2
    steve2

    It was JW organization that put the "con" in confidentiality.

  • Chook
    Chook

    I remember as a catholic kid their confessional system made you feel good and the priest couldn't tell his wife. JW elders ALL talk to some degree to their spouse. When married couples guilt tripped in to confessing oral sex in the seventies and got the Jw legal divorce , who going to pay for the wrecked children. Abuse of celestial privilege is rampant in JW land.

  • smiddy
    smiddy

    The thought that Elders dont speak confidential matters with their wives ? I almost choked in my beer.

    OK ,some dont ,but I believe they are a minority.

  • sir82
    sir82

    If you don't want something known, for gawd's sake don't talk to the elders.

  • dozy
    dozy

    Confidentiality was always a joke when I was a JW. In every congregation that I was an elder the body leaked like a rusty colander - you knew that at least half the elders would discuss any interesting information and juicy gossip afterwards with their wives and mates in the congregation. The Society knows that it is a serious problem in virtually every congregation & it is invariably an item on the agenda at KM schools and the subject of many elders letters - not that it ever makes any difference - human nature , I guess , and one of the perks of what is a rather miserable job.

    I made the stupid mistake of when I was fading having a "chat" with an elder and I stressed that I was only having a conversation as we were friends & he assured me that everything would be kept private between him and me. He promptly went home , blabbed everything to his wife who then spoke to my extended family about my "apostate views" and it caused me no end of problems. I phoned him up & tore a strip off him , but frankly it was my fault - I should have known better.

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