Shunning & separation from family

by CJxfarmx 24 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Giordano

    CJx there is another side to this situation.

    In my case my wife and I left. Basically we faded away and happened to move twice and lost all contact with our JW friends. That was not a problem........ our family was..... especially my side. Our Moms and our sisters did not shun us it wasn't required back then.

    So the other side of the coin is that whenever we visited that 800 pound gorilla was always sitting in the living room with us, at the dining table.

    We wouldn't let it crawl into bed with us lol but there was always a fresh WT and Awake next to the bed. I could smell them and despised the circle reasoning.

    Our families interests centered around 'the friends' lite, assemblies and so forth.

    The End was always coming.

    We couldn't leave our son unattended as we had no trust in them making the decision to allow blood if he was in a serious accident. Nor would they respect our request not to bring him to meetings or study the Bible JW style.

    The mistake we made was to try to stay close to our family......... to try to be a family.

    Every visit could become toxic.

    CJ Your Dad had no reason to shun you....... it wasn't even required by the WTBTS.

    But now I have no relationship with him because of that.

    He was a drunk, abusive and an adulterer. He choose to be that way. The odds are you would not have tolerated him around your family or exposed your friends to a person like that.

    He's the one that lost out.......... you have your own family. But yes we know that it still hurts.

    I'll end on a brighter've just found your lost tribe......... hang around and get reacquainted.

  • Sail Away
    Sail Away

    Giordano, beautiful, truthful post.

  • Island Man
    Island Man
    I'm sorry for your loss, though really it's his. You have a family, he has a cult a cult has him

  • CJxfarmx

    Giordano, wow thank you!

  • Landy

    Perhaps if you're still suffering after 30 years of estrangement professional counselling may be the best way for you to move forward.

  • CJxfarmx

    Thank you everyone who replied. It's been a landmark day for me. To finally be able to talk about this has been amazing and eye opening.

  • Disassociated Lady 2
    Disassociated Lady 2

    I left the JWs at 16 and have been shunned most of my life since then, my parents didn't really know my children and I have not had much contact with siblings either. You can find genuine people who will be more caring than your family and will help fill the gap. :-) xxxxxx

  • zeb

    his loss not yours. Keep this in mind; shunning is a two edged sword. When he comes to you after money for health or age care or anything else, tell him he must write to the elders or the gb.

  • JWdaughter

    Your dad is a jerk. Had he stayed in any kind of contact with you, it likely would be to harangue you and assault your ears with his theocratic speeches. You haven't lost much in that man. I"m sorry you were orphaned.

  • CJxfarmx

    JWdaughter, yup he sends me a watchtower magazine every once in a while. I can't even stand the feel of the paper it's printed on much less the content and the bizarre imagery.

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