First time here - My Story (Spousal Abuse)

by Centaurus A 15 Replies latest jw experiences

  • pale.emperor

    First of all, welcome! And it's great that you've found a good decent man for you and your boys.

    I developed a severe anxiety disorder. It wasn’t just being anxious all the time. It was severe panic attacks combined with Emetophobia (fear of vomiting or seeing vomit). Looking back now, it all made sense as Emetophobia is about fear of losing control. I was quite ill with this disease as it lead to anorexia. I was afraid to eat too much because I felt a full stomach could cause me to vomit.

    THIS! /\ - I had exactly the same thing! I never realized until you said it was probably fear of losing control. The emetophobia vanished when I left the JWs.

    You're the second person I've read about this week who's left. This is good news indeed.

  • Diogenesister

    Don't have too much time but just want to say two things:

    Welcome, first of course, and secondly you are a very courageous woman to get your boys out of that situation despite being so indoctrinated. Many don't or rather can't, and their boys suffer for it. I'm incredibly impressed. I'll add some stuff later. Dio xxx

  • truth_b_known

    Welcome and thank you for sharing your story with us all.

    As Jehovah's Witnesses are being exposed more and more for their practice of hiding child abuse, domestic violence is another example of secrets kept from the public by the organization. Many women are being physically abused by their spouse who are also Jehovah's Witnesses are treated as you were by leadership in the organization. Rather than help you, elders make the problem yours by recommending you be more humble or kind to your abusive spouse. Heaven forbid they actually get educated and learn that domestic violence is about control and it's never about the victim. Whatever happens they will never get the authorities involved. They put the reputation of the organization above the physical well being of those in danger.

    I also find it appalling that the only recommendation for marital problems is attend more meetings and study the Bible more. Millions of happy married couples have never walked into a Kingdom Hall or read the Bible. I fail to see how that is a cure-all for marriages.

  • jamiebowers

    Well, it sounds like things haven't changed much in Watch Tower world. I made a similar escape from an abusive jw husband about 30 years ago. Keep reading and thinking, and your cult induced phobias will eventually cease.

  • jp1692

    Welcome and thanks for sharing your story!

  • steve2

    Hey there! What a fantastic story of recovery and getting back on your feet. Your step Mom sounds like the pits and as for that first husband of yours - he sounds like an out of control kid - the kind of “man” who fits in well with the JW patriarchy. How blind are these JWs who put the blame on the woman? That’s what patriarchies do. The man disciplines, the woman is subservient.

    Glad you are now married to a decent man - no surprise he’s not a JW. May you continue to prosper and thrive!

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